I am gentle and meek, learn from me. Jesus
Gentle---Considerate or kindly in disposition; amiable and tender. Soft and mild: not harsh or stern or severe.
Grumpiness and harshness have become a warning sign to me that I am too busy. Overloaded schedules, frenzy over the commitments I have made in life that are not the priorities God has called me to, bring a spirit of harshness that makes the work of discipleship of my children null and void.
Last year, fretting and feeling overwhelmed was a common occurrence. because of advice from my publisher and others working with me on my new book, Dancing With My Father, I was counseled to join 17 networks, have a facebook fan page and tweet and write article every day, and and and..............
My plate overflowed with what I thought was too much to do. The heart of my voice for all these years, emerged from thousands of days being faithful at home, investing hours being with my children, not answering the phone, not being on computer, not being consumed with something bigger, constant, demanding all the time when my computer talked to me and went "bing" one more time.
It happened that I was away at a hotel--I had a free night. Joy had joined me late at night, after a meeting, and was snuggled up in my bed. My eyes popped open at 5 a.m., and I realized I had knots in my stomach and already feeling, again, like I couldn't get it all done!
Escaping to hotel lobby, I nestled into an overstuffed chair and whispered anxious prayers. "Lord, what do you want me to do? How do you want me to deal with all of this? I feel like I am taking away the center of my life."
Sitting in the semi-darkness of dawn, the sun peaked over Pike's Peak. Snow capped crystals sparkled on the rising pink sun. Majesty spoke to my heart, beauty calmed my soul. "I am here--these are my fingerprints. Why do you fret over pleasing everyone else's expectations? You have a beautiful 15 year old daughter today, waiting to be with you. You follow me and my priorities for you and put the expectations of others away, and all will be well."
Peace overtook me, the spell of a moment of silence wrapped in grandeur spoke deeply to my heart. I closed my computer on the table beside me, went back to my hotel room, put back on my gown, and snuggled down in the warm covers, and spent a delightful, memorable, memory making day with my real live flesh and blood Joy, who is here now for just a year or two more.
But most of all, my gentleness returned, and we cherished the Lord in our midst and celebrated life together.