We are human beings with needs, emotions, desires, personality. We learn little by little to grow stronger. Maturity is a long process. You will never, ever be perfect, but you are loved for who you are right now in the process. And God loves you so dearly and wants you to know His mercy and understanding of how you feel.
Read more about this in Well Lived.
I can rest assured that the same gracious God who entrusted four precious, fragile lives into my hands, will be faithful to keep those children in his hands.
He will build a home through me, and a testimony through my children, that will stand here on this earth and throughout eternity.
Read more about this in Seasons Of A Mother’s Heart.
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When I was almost 42, my precious daughter, Joy entered the world. Celebrating her birthday by attending a concert by Paul Simon found us walking arm in arm, as close friends, sharing secrets, ideas, dreams. She wrote all about it in her latest Substack post—I know you will love reading it.
We came upon a bakery with her favorite pastries. Fortitude it boldly proclaimed.
Fortitude: the mental/moral strength to, persevere, withstand fear, difficulty.
Does it matter? The days of messes, children bickering, forming beauty out of chaos? One more sleepless night only to find more demanding hours awaiting our attention.
Endless, relentless days of cooking, cleaning, serving, correcting, repeating it over again?
Working through relationships with beloved adult children, issues bubbling up, difficulties abounding, the risk of being misunderstood, unnoticed.
After 45 years of marriage, 43 years of mothering, I know that every kiss, tender, gentle moment of talking, being patient, every late night feeding, midnight discussion with my bewildered teens and adult children, all matters profoundly. What would a world hope for if there were not great women committed to serving, civilizing, bringing beauty from chaos and believing courageously in the truths of God, during dark times? Courageous women are building a legacy of faith, love, goodness.
I know your faithfulness matters, because serving my children, giving my imperfect best, gave them an opportunity to ponder God, to grow beyond my meager offerings into their own potential for living truly in their generation. There is a sacredness of marriage, family, faith, life of human beings born into the world as tiny, dependent babies. We give worth to these truths by daily fortitude.
Your choice to trust God is ringing out cheers in the heavens because it is so rare. No formulas, no guarantees of exact results. We do not control our adult children’s choices. But they are more likely to follow truth if it has been lived out in myriad moments of serving, loving, feeding, listening, praying, teaching faithfully over years. Faithfulness happens over thousands of days, years, of laying down our lives. Today, you are writing your story of faith and faithfulness. Podcast today!
Rather than judging each person’s individual attributes according to our own standards of what is good and acceptable, how important it is that we look at the heart of who a person was created to be.
Accepting differences and learning to understand heart motivations for antics, behavior, or actions is of profound importance to validating a person’s worth, or indeed all people’s worth, as a masterpiece crafted by God.
To respect each person’s uniqueness is to worship God for His wonderful design.
Read more about this in Uniquely You.
When we learn to look and listen and ponder, our everyday moments can be transformed by the knowledge of a God whose companionship brings joy, “wind to our wings,” and the possibility of a miraculous touch at any moment.
And when we convey this vision of God's powerful presence to our children, we give them the gift of joy in each moment and the knowledge that even in the tedium of commonplace chores the Lord is looking out for us, ready to give his help and strength and presence.
Read more about this in The Ministry Of Motherhood.
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“And Abraham went out not knowing where he was going.” -Hebrews 11:8
“How do we make the commitment to give the area of motherhood over to God as a sacrifice of worship to him? We yield our personal rights into his hands. We give up our time and expectations to him—and also our fears and worries about how we will manage. We trust him to take care of us and our family. We let him redirect our thinking and expectations and adjust our dreams. And we wait in faith to see the fruit of our hard labor in the lives of our children, knowing that he will be faithful to honor our commitment to him.” The Mission of Motherhood, p. 54
There is a depth of love and a sense of “belonging to one another,” a completeness, when I can be with my adult children and grandchildren.
Do I wish they lived next door to me? Of course! But I champion their choices, believe in their aspirations, because I raised them to flourish in the world God allowed them to be born into, to live a story of light.
The past week I have been with my 5 grands. Playing, holding them in a fond embrace, admiring their crafts and bouquets of flowers, and whispering I love you messages as often as possible deep into their hearts.
I have enjoyed meals, coffees, long walks with Joel. Taken Sarah to an extended several course meal for long private chats, hearts shared. And visited Joy in London for days to be friends sharing life. I can’t wait for Nathan and Keelia to greet me and to go out for brunch to catch each other up on the last month’s events.
More on my podcast.
Making a choice to resist stewing and fretting over all the issues of my day gives me the ability to delight in each moment as a gift. I give each morning into the Father's hands and picture myself more and more at rest against him like a weaned child.
By faith, I take my place next to him, counting on him to care for me and protect me and to accept me as I am—even with my limitations—because of his grace and because of my role as his daughter. My responsibilities have not changed, but my relationship to my responsibilities has.
Read more about this in Dancing With My Heavenly Father.
Accepting the limitations of life in general, was an essential step for my learning to make peace with life as it is, as it comes to me every day.
Allowing God to unfold my fingers one at a time from my tightly held expectations for order and fulfillment led to an ability to celebrate each day for whatever it brought.
It gave me an understanding that the divine love of God filled each moment, His companionship attended to me through each trial, and His care would cover every concern.
Read more about this in Different.
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Wonderful friends, wish you could be here with me on my three weeks of adventure. The highlight of my trip has been getting to cultivate new friends, listen to their hearts and their needs, and dreams, and enjoying a community , and having them listen to my heart as well. I realized in the midst of our week that I need more downtime with friends. It is a sort of healing to our hearts to be listened to and understood.
One of the most fun times I had was taking a French cooking class and creating the delicacies with my friends. Here I am taking my turn at whipping egg whites until they were so hard they stood up at attention.
Creating new recipes like this and asparagus risotto gave each of us a new scope for how the pros do it. I would love to know what some of your best recipes are as I need a little bit of creativity added to my cooking these days.
I will be gone for one more week, but I will keep trying to make at least short podcast to tell you where I’ve been. Have a great week! And be sure to make something new and creative to delight yourself and your family.
Learn to be the conductor of your table. Set the rhythm and the rules of your conversation. Make sure the quiet are heard, make sure the talkative are loved. Through your example, teach your children to be “quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry” (James 1:19). Let your table be the training grounds for graciousness and consideration.
When I look at the adults my children have become, I do not regret a single ounce of the effort I put into shaping our family dynamics.
Our dinner table became what I had dreamed it would be—a place of sharing and of growing. As I look back, I know that this has been one of the most formative parts of my parenting and discipling and my life in general—watching Jesus, the Word made flesh, bring life to all of us through the gift of words.
Read more about this in The Lifegiving Table.
