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But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
~Romans 5:8
It is such a gift to know we are loved.
One day, I was playing with Darcy Dog and throwing her the ball, scratching her back relentlessly, feeding her. As I was pondering her, I realized that she made messes, chewed up things around our home, had accidents on the carpet, barked at deer and woke us up at nights. Yet, no matter what she did, I accepted her limitations. We never expected her to behave to perfection. We love her ridiculously. As I was playing with her, it was as though God inspired a thought. “That is how I feel about you. I absolutely love you through and through and find pleasure in you because you are mine. Even when you mess up, make demands, need my constant attention—I love you as you are, every day, all they time.
The first time I really came to understand that God loved me with no demands, no expectations, no wrinkled brow over disappointed eyes, it was such a relief. I remember the great sense of relief and gratitude that overwhelmed me after so many years of striving and feeling like I could never measure up to anyone’s standards—not even my own. Finding that I was completely known and completely accepted by God won my heart completely and set my intention to serve Him forever.
As mamas, we must view our children as God views us—we love them because they are our very own. Many of us find that our children were not as we expected. We love them, but as mamas, we see different personalities, iimmature behavior, inability at times to sleep and all sorts of issues that tax us. And sometimes it is just the noise, the personality differences that rub us raw. Like us, they are messy.
But we know that all of our children, need a foundation of unconditional love as we do, no matter the issues. A child who knows he is loved will have a foundation that allows for growth as well as movement, as he doesn’t have to spend energy or time on striving for acceptance. Love settles the heart, offering warmth and light that encourages giftings and talents to grow strong and straight. Of course, our children know they have flaws and imperfections, that they stumble and choose unwisely at times. It’s in those times our love is most needed, as their own disappointment as well as flares of accusation from the enemy may tempt them to give up or sink into self-judgment. A mama who reaches out in love when a child expects condemnation will not only combat that tendency, but paint a powerful picture of the good shepherd’s always-reaching love in her child’s heart. That goes for older “children,” too!
Of course, we will probably have to make progress in admitting and accepting our own imperfections as well as God’s forgiveness of our personal sin if we are to offer this sort of unconditional love to our children. We can only pass on what we have learned for ourselves, and so we must dedicate ourselves to growing closer to the Lord and coming to know His love. It is the work of a lifetime—the best sort of work anyone could ever pursue.
I hope you will enjoy and be encouraged by today’s conversation with Misty Krasawski as we discuss loving our own imperfect children!
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