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"A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." — Proverbs 15:1
Several women have emailed me or messaged me lately about how exhausted, weary, drained they feel in the warp and woof of life. And then, often comes, “And I have been so harsh with my loved ones.”
Then follows self-condemnation, guilt that weighs heavy hanging over thoughts and hearts.
Committed motherhood is a long marathon of life with constant demands, draining, endless tasks. Yet, over years and seasons, I realized how much choosing, practicing gentleness brings peace, provides comfort of being loved unconditionally through all circumstances.
A hormonal teen, an exhausted toddler, a school-aged child, or a husband who is angry, a depressed or critical friend—all of these, long to be treated with focused attention, an understanding heart, a loving gentle response.
As we all know, it is natural to react in like—anger to anger. However, it is supernatural to give a gentle gracious answer from the Spirit of Him who is love that leads us to react in love. And yet, as the Spirit lives through us, we will see His power and fruit drawing others to Him in us, when we choose to remember bits of truth he has left for us to follow. A gentle answer, turns away anger.
Gentleness grows stronger with practice. It comes with humility. It grows as wisdom and takes root in the heart that values the ones she loves.
“Always to be gentle toward everyone.” — Titus 3:2
Perhaps before I became a wife, or parent, I assumed, I would be able to be mature, healthy, loving, and successful at these relationships. Conflict in my own heart and life, the stress of living with so many needs and so many constant demands showed me my selfishness.
I longed for mercy, but especially for gentleness. I wanted to be understood—that I had a heart to be good at these relationships but sometimes I just couldn't—my own selfishness got in the way. I meant to be patient, giving, loving, but I had my limits. As an idealist and “feeler” heart, I wanted compassion and sympathy, but especially a gentle response—not anger and condemnation.
How can you practice gentleness today?
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