Writing and speaking, for me, is the means through which I most grow. There is something about having the responsibility of telling others the true concepts of God's word and seeking to pass on a love for Him, that changes me in the process. And so writing Dancing With My Father changed me deeply, and is still changing me. I might have changed even more since I turned in the manuscript, which was an exceedingly busy and demanding time in my life, than I did as I was writing it.
To live, fully alive, aware, sensing the presence of my gentle, loving Lord every day, in the tiny moments of my day--knowing He is here with me, He will always love me and pursue me, forgive me, help me--these realities that I am taking time to ponder and to know and understand, are changing the very heart of me--and entering into His presence, consciously, intentionally---when I remember to--is giving me more joy--even in the midst of the many pressures of my life. I know so much more clearly now, that all of my days have purpose in light of eternity and God's desire to bring me more and more to freedom, to value those things of eternity.
And so today, I pass on just a few thoughts from my book that may be of some encouragement--it is for me like reading my journal and so speaks to me again of what He has taught me.
"One of the greatest obstacles was my response to disappointments, frustration, and the day-to-day interruptions of life. As I evaluated these things in light of my commitment to walk in joy, I could see that, in reality, God had used many of my difficulties to create in me a deeper, more compassionate heart, I could see that the hand of God had faithfully met me at my need and somehow sustained me instead of letting me go under. I also realized that he had used these challenges to loosen my grip on the worldly, temporal things I had previously looked to for security and stability and instead compelled me to rely on him and seek eternal answers."
And then, later, I saw a Biblical story of dancing with God from a person who had learned this dance of joy in the privacy of his own life, where on one saw but God. "Here was my picture of Joy: David, having faithfully waited through years of anguish, danger, and humility, never lost his true focus on his ultimate Source of joy, his God, who had been with David every day, through every circumstance. Over 25 years of running away from Saul, losing his wife, having his children captured, attempted murder on his life, loneliness through battles from within and without. When he came to be king, his focus was still on His God and celebrating HIs presence in front of all who would follow Him as king. And with his heart focused on the Source of his joy, David could leap and dance "before the LORD with all his might" (2 Samuel 6:14). This out of heartfelt celebration.
I believe that David saw in God great freedom -- that his God created pleasure, color, beauty, food, love, sound, taste, and deep happiness. David was not tied up in knots of religion and rules, pretense and performance. Instead, he enjoyed and delighted in the God whom he knew to be his close friend and Lord. His dancing was a genuine expression of what he felt in his heart for his most beloved and intimate companion.
Where had he learned this? Out in the field, alone and free to ponder and live before God without pretense, being in nature withthe stars and storms, seasons and changes. He'd been daily alone, living in the beauty of a world that displayed God's glory and handiwork. He'd spend many hours writing music about it, thinking about the Great Designer, and singing to an audience of one."
And so today, as I am living this day, in my own "field" of life, I may learn to hear the music of His voice speaking to me in my circumstances, through the miracle of a child singing, giggling, buds opening up on a tree, daffodils blooming, the heavy breath of an angel baby, fast asleep, the warmth of snuggling under the blankets on a cold, snowy spring morning with the companion of my life, the taste of hot coffee, with sugar and cream flowing down my throat, the crystal beauty of my snow covered world around me--all of these from His hand-- a part of His art in my life, to see His presence and to be aware of His provision.
All must be seen, observed, appreciated, engaged in, in order to feed the depths of my soul.
May the field of your life bring you the joy of His presence today.