Encourage one another........!

So many letters and emails I receive are about the "battle" each woman is experiencing. Sometimes it is a marriage problem, being overwhelmed with little ones, an anger issue, a stray child, exhaustion, inadequacy. We all have one life in which to stay strong in our story of faith. Today is our opportunity to show our faith in Christ by how we live each moment--to love as He loved, to speak words of life instead of killing those in our pathway with our words, to give generously of ourselves as He gave daily.  Yet, this life of extending ourselves can become very draining. How to keep going? Encouragement! Help from others. I keep going in our ministry and traveling because Clay and I feel that we need to be a voice of encouragement, inspiration, strengthening to stay strong in a world that doesn't have our values or spiritual foundations. To give courage--to help someone be faithful because they feel their life matters---that is the basis of encouragement.

Yet, Clay and I keep going because of the encouragement we receive from those who take time to speak words of strength into our own lives. 

I thought I would list a few verses that specifically remind us of the importance of encouraging and giving strength to those in our lives--our husbands, children, friends, family. So take initiative to encourage loved ones in your life today--and those who you know need those words of life! 

Ephesians 4:29 Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, that it may give grace to those who hear.The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life, But the mouth of the wicked conceals violence. 

Proverbs 10:11

1 Thessalonians 4:18  Therefore comfort one another with these words. 

Hebrews 10:25 not forsaking our own assembling together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another; and all the more, as you see the day drawing near.

1 Thessalonians 3:2 and we sent Timothy, our brother and God's fellow worker in the gospel of Christ, to strengthen and encourage you as to your faith, Romans 15:4 For whatever was written in earlier times was written for our instruction, that through perseverance and the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope.

Acts 15:32 And Judas and Silas, also being prophets themselves, encouraged and strengthened the brethren with a lengthy message. 

Hebrews 10:24-25 

And let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds, not forsaking our own assembling together as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another and all the more as you see the day drawing near.

We must consider, think about, ponder, take initiative as to how we might stimulate our beloved to love and good deeds.

As God always initiated His love, we are made in His image to be givers and initiators. You can make a difference today. Blessings of His grace to you today.

Sisters and Friends make for healthier women! Girlfriends are essential!

 Joy and Sarah enjoying being pals.

When I was a young single missionary living in Poland, I had my precious pal, Gwennie, to live with under harsh conditions. Poland was under the communist rule of Russia during those years. Not much in the way of food to be found--rarely could we find meat. Fruit was scarce except in seasonal times. (Remind me to tell you my banana story sometime!) Life was hard. We were living subversively seeking to lead people to Christ and share Bibles in a country where it was illegal.

However, Gwennie and I, being women created by God to be nurturers,  took care of each other. We spent almost every waking hour together. Walking a couple of miles to school where we struggled through the Polish language. Scouring the market square for some fresh food of some kind. Inviting girls from all over the country to stay with us to learn the Bible, we were partners in everything. 

If one of us was sick, the other took care and made a cup of tea. Every night we would light candles on our little coffee table (didn't have a dining table), put on music, eat dinner (usually one more kind of eggs as it was one of the only things we could easily get), and have a lovely time of fellowship. After dinner, we would read a chapter of a book out-loud. It was where I first read, Treasures of the Snow, by Patricia St. John. What a delight to be with a sister-friend, over candlelight, entering the world of Switzerland, children, and a rousing story, with a cup of coffee and celebrate some moments together.

The single men missionaries, however, did not fare so well. Many times they got sick more often, they became lonely and often returned from the mission field earlier. Why? I think it was because men didn't nurture each other! Women did. 

Years ago, I decided that women did better long term as missionaries because they were made to be help-meets. They knew how to take care of people--even their roommates.

I found this article below, very interesting, because of my theory all of these years that women, nurturers, are better able to sustain life, as they were created by God to do so. Celebrate womanhood at its best--nurture another woman in friendship, love and memories.

 

My girls and I with Gwen in a "girl's club" memory last year. She is an honorary member!   

But for those of you who don't have sisters or daughters, I believe you can adopt them! I don't have a sister, but I have my sweet friends. I make time with them, meals, outings, phone chats, visits to far away sisters (Gwen!), because they bring affirmation, love, fun, care and nurture in ways that only girlfriends and sisters can. Sarah, Joy and I even have what we call "Girl's club" where we make time only for the girls!

So, plan to find a "sister"-friend that you can share life with. It will make you healthier and happier!

Article:

Having a sister can be good for emotional health!  

Developing Souls Alive vs. De-personalizing of technology

  Build an appetite for your children. Go outside and play!

 Cell phones, facebook, blogs, websites, tv, ipods, game systems, etc. 

None of these were mediums were prevalent when I was raising my three older children. They were beginning to develop, but we had one computer for the whole family and the kids could spend a half-hour a day on computer, with weekends occasionally being an exception. We had lots of family friendly videos, but used them as a special occasion, not an expectation. Couldn't have done early life without Winnie the Pooh.

However, now, this technology has developed so rapidly, that it is literally changing relationships, brain structure. It is Joy's world with her friends. But, it is essential to understand the ramifications of technology and the importance of limiting it. 

When a child becomes addicted to these mediums, the cyberspace world becomes more reality to him than personal relationships. Children who spend time on violent video games are likely to become more violent. That shouldn't surprise us. What we sow we reap. Guard your heart for from it flow the springs of life. Whatever is true, honorable, just, lovely, ..., think on these things.

Scripture is very clear about the profound importance of being stewards of our brains. Without personal relationships, time to read and ponder, time to observe creation, we cannot as easily imagine and relate to God. When all time is taken up with media, there is not time to pray, plan, think, talk, build brain pathways. 

A child's deepest need is for love, purpose, well-being, health. A machine cannot give any child or human being these essential things. Technology  can pacify temporarily, but eventually a person craves for more and more and more, more entertainment, more stimulation, more numbing of the hunger and longing that lives inside, for real life, real love, real attention and time spent.

The home should be a place of authentic life, not virtual life.

Reading out-loud a half-hour to a couple of hours a day provided lots of food for their brains. Dress up clothes from Good Will, capes, swords, provided them with lots of tools for acting out the stories they had taken into their hearts. Playing outside, hours of capture the flag, rox-a-boxin pretend cities in the back yard, writing books, playing shopkeeper, tea times, meals together, designing lego towns, drawing with colored pencils, painting with water color, shaping play dough, cooking, gardening, playing an instrument, doing chores, having lots of people over for lunch, dinner, going to concerts, hiking, and a multitude of other activities gave us as a family a foundation of health--mentally, physically, spiritually, emotionally. 

We shared life, discussed issues, told stories, lived fully in creativity and personal relationships. This real life tied an invisible string from one heart to the other, holding us together in a corpus of morality, faith, love, and purpose.

Now, as I raise Joy, I have to be very intentional at keeping life personal, life-giving, relational. The time it takes to provide her with relationship and life experiences, automatically means I have little time for working on my computer. But the stewardship I have for her mind, body and soul are more profound than all the ministry and influence that I can have outside my home. So my emails pile up day by day, but my family's souls are prospering and growing.

Technology is raging because people are lonely and looking for meaning and relationship online. But it is destroying their brains, their consciences, their ability to think deeply, to build a vocabulary, to take time to be outdoors, to build a real, deep relationship with a friend by talking, instead of having virtual reality of life on a screen. The idol of technology is replacing a love for God for a hunger for those who might be looking for me or who can validate me in cyberspace.

As moms, we must protect our children from developing an early appetite for technology if we want them to have deep, healthy brains. One side of the brain is so passive when a person watches tv, that it slows down to a rate slower than when one is asleep. The brain cannot take in so many images and so it shuts down to protect itself. A brain developed over years of shut down will atrophy.

So much could be said about this, but don't want to keep you on a screen too long!

Two interesting articles on media this week. 

If your kids are awake, they are probably online!

Your brain on computers: the need for downtime.

Have a great weekend--hopefully outdoors in this lovely fall weather!

A Story of giving and becoming rich....Eugene Peterson

Eugene Peterson author  

For you know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that though He was rich, yet for your sake He became poor, so that you through His poverty might become rich. 2 Corinthians 8:9

 Clay and I have been in the mountains at a retreat center for the past two days hearing one of our favorite writers, Eugene Peterson, review his most recent books. What a privilege it was to soak in the conversations, the wisdom and experiences He and His wife shared their stories and their lives with all of us who attended. Eugene is 78 and his wife Jan, 75 and they have given their whole lives to ministry. 

Most of those in attendance (only 90), were seasoned church leaders and pastors. At a gathering early one morning, the women were pouring out their hearts to find wisdom and encouragement from Jan. Subjects covered:  "Did you ever doubt your call to ministry? Did you have problems in your marriage? How did you deal with the work load of your husband? What about financially difficult times? The pressure on children can be hard to handle. I get so depleted that I just want to run away from it all." And other heart cries. 

There is something true about misery loving company. When we see that others struggle, we also find comfort that it is not just us--and that we are not neurotic, that others are experiencing the same thing, and that it is possible to live through our common trials in life. It was great to be in the company of so sweet a couple who had given--had spent their lives for others, and held on valiantly to Christ.

What struck me the most, was how their lives, messages, books and compassion for others came out of their failures, the messes of life, the dark times, as well as years of faithfulness and seeking God. Rhythms of "A Long Obedience in the Same Direction." (the title of one of his books.) 

They had 7 years they called the "badlands" because life was so very difficult and depressing. And yet, it was from this that the core of Eugene's books were written. 

There was a time they had even had difficulty buying groceries for their 4 children, so they reverted to powdered milk because it was cheaper. (a little side story that Jan shared--but so like the details of life issues that are ours every day.)

 Pondering my own life, I could see similar patterns of Gods work even in the small daily grind. From being humbled, I learned compassion for others. From being in the dark, I learned that God was in control. From being needy, I learned that I could live without. From being in pain, I found HIs comfort and love. From living in the limitations and fears of the times I am living in, I learned to long for heaven.

Oddly enough, there was a verse in my quiet time while I was there that seemed to tie into the days of thoughts.

One verse really pulsed through my mind again and again, "For you know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that though He was rich, for your sake He became poor."

Eugene and Jan gave up everything in their lives to follow Jesus. They pursued him during dark times, they served others and gave themselves, that those they served might become rich. They took in 4 children whose mother died of cancer. They visited people, ill and needy and stayed committed in ministry to the unattractive who needed love, grace and patience. 

Through their faithfulness and holding tenaciously to Christ, their story became a testimony that enriched our own lives. 

Jesus, God incarnate, became poor that I might become rich. Gave up supreme heavenly authority and splendor, to become a fragile, vulnerable baby in a wicked world. Became a man of sorrows, acquainted with grief by entering personally into the conflict, pain, and suffering of strangers in his life, to bear them up, to heal them, to champion their cause.

Dirt on his feel from walking dusty roads, hunger from preaching too long in the hot sun; Tickling, embracing, blessing the wiggly children running into His arms, thrusting tables and cages in wrath that overcame Him from conniving, thieves taking advantage of the naive, sincere worshippers; putting up with foolishness and arguing of His followers, experiencing rejection from those he had created. 

So, is it too much to ask that I spend my life, abandoning my rights, pouring out my time and love on the needy and undeserving, as He did to me?

This concept of servant leadership is the foundation that fueled my own understanding of being a mother, modeling Him in my home. It became a picture of what He wanted me to do in marriage---spending my life so that Clay could become richer. It is for Him that we serve--and in serving Him, our hearts are filled.

So, this week: Calculating and evaluating, "To whom has He called me to give up myself, my time, my love and prayers, my words of life, my service, that they might become rich? 

My children, my husband, my friends, those sweet moms in my ministry that I want to shepherd and encourage. I expending my life--giving it away, that others may become rich--this is what I am learning this week as I seek how I may better understand my precious Lord. 

And yet I have found that it is in coming to that point of deciding to give when He asks of me, that I, in the end, become more filled in my heart with the assurance of His love and presence. "He who loses his life for my sake, will find it." 

Thank you, Eugene and Jan for becoming for me this week a living picture of a real life lived out in giving yours away.

My own personal favorite books of his: Christ plays in Ten Thousand Places; Running with the Horses; Eat This Book.

These books are more theological in nature, focussing on the life of Christ and the life of Christ in ministry. Widely read by pastors (and those who like these kinds of books--like me!) 

Cultivating a Message that moves people

I was talking to a precious friend yesterday who has a significant influence on thousands of people. She longs to find out how to become a better writer, speaker, and mom. In this time of history, women have deep hunger and longing  for more meaningful lives. Our children find themselves in a culture that promotes emptiness and lonelineness and they also long for direction and spiritual food that will deeply satisfy their soul's hunger. Answering these deep needs, as those who are called by God to bring hope and truth and foundations that will hold comes at a cost. If a mom wants to significantly influence her children--or if she wants to truly shepherd other women, she must put herself on a course of seeking God with all of her heart.

God's ways, we read in Isaiah, our not our ways. His thoughts are so far above our thoughts--as high as the heaven is above the earth, so far are His thoughts from our thoughts. And so, when we seek Him and want to be filled with His excellence and holiness and presence, we want it now or at least by next week. We pray in the name of Jesus and like a toddler who wants his cookies now, we plead with God again and again to do our will.

Yet, God, in His mercy and wisdom, is not threatened by our pleading. He loves us so much that Hs takes His time to build that which we long for--true love, true wisdom, true intimacy.

He has never, not once, worked according to my timetable. I am not patient by nature, and He has required much patience from me. But, as I look back at a life of wrestling with Him and holding on for dear life and seeking, straining to understand Him, I see that He was doing soul work, deep down heart work, to give me more of a value for heaven, for His kingdom, for eternity.

Learning that what He is doing right now, in these circumstances, is what He wants me to learn so that I will have wisdom and depth in my heart for others to draw from. Leaning into Him by faith, even when I do not understand, has been the reward of coming to see more of His ways. I am still learning and still straining to hear.

I loved this devotion this morning by David Wilkerson that got to a little of what I have been thinking about soul deepening life--that then gives us messages to share. Enjoy and then pray for David Wilkerson--I love to pray for those who fill my soul.

BATTLE SMART

Whenever opposition arises, God’s grace thrives in us. Think about what

happens to a tree when a great storm beats violently against it. The wind

threatens to uproot the tree and carry it away. It breaks off branches and

blows away its leaves. It loosens its roots and blows off its buds. And when

the storm is over, things look hopeless.

Yet, look closer; the same storm that opened crevices in the earth around the

trunk of the tree has helped the roots go deeper. The tree now has access to

new, deeper sources of nutrition and water. And it has been purged of all its

dead branches. The buds may be gone, but others will grow back more fully. I

tell you, that tree is now stronger, growing in unseen ways. And just wait till

harvest—because it’s going to bear much fruit!

Maybe you’re in a storm right now. The wind is blowing hard, shaking you

violently, and you think you’re going down. Beloved, don’t panic! You’ve

got to know that in the midst of the tempest, you are putting down deep

spiritual roots. God is developing in you a deepening humility, a greater

mourning and sorrow for sin, a heightened hunger for his righteousness.

God is making you a seasoned soldier of the cross—battle-scarred, but

battle-smart and courageous. You may get down on yourself at times—but the

Lord never does. The fact is, he could have acted sovereignly at any time to

pluck you out of your struggle. But he didn’t—because he saw it producing

in you a greater thirst for him!

Romans 5:3 says, “Tribulation worketh patience.” The word worketh means

“to accomplish.”

In 2 Corinthians 4:17 we read, “For our light affliction, which is but for a

moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory.” The

word worketh in this verse is the same as in Romans 5:3.

Read this devotion online: http://www.worldchallenge.org/en/node/9880

Sermons By David Wilkerson

Shopping, dressing-up, and totally fun, irresponsibility--just what I needed!

One of my beautiful outfits! Sweater-shawl, scarf, bracelet, necklace, earrings!

Whew! Weeks of responsibility and giving out--my intensive, company, adult children with myriads of needs, still home educating Joy, dinners, dishes, financial struggles, little sleep, giving, giving, giving.......

And then He interrupts my life--with delight.....

The Lord is so very thoughtful at times, that I truly feel like His beloved. Arranging personal, focused blessings just for me so that I stand back and see that He knows, He knows my loneliness for my mother, even when I am not aware. He knows I miss being mothered, I miss being noticed. He sees what would delight me even when I would never have thought to ask.

For many years, my mother would go shopping with me each fall to pick out two "speaking" outfits. I would then wear them all year to every place I would speak.   "You need to be beautiful in all the places God has opened for you to speak. You have always been my little dolly and we will go out and make a celebration of it--you and me! That is my part in your ministry.

Adult time, spoiling me with lunch, little trinkets, talk, talk, talk,  buying me things that as a young mom I  could not afford, or would not afford because of all my little ones. Pretty dresses, or professional, classic outfits for meetings and interviews. Shoes to match and of course a new necklace or earrings.  A lunch and coffee and sweets at the end,  framed a special memory each year---just mama and me and the sharing of our hearts. "And you might just need this for a little something, as she tucked a $20 into my coat pocket." 

Mother-love providing, encouraging, nurturing, embracing, guiding, empathizing,  and listening--and that is what my sweet mom used to do. Sometimes I don't even realize how deeply I miss being "mothered."

I didn't realize how much I missed those yearly outings with her. The past 7 years, she struggling with an aging disease, has turned me more into an adult, little by little, who must call, write and send my love and care, while she stays day after day, needing help, care and pushing through it all, seeking to maintain a good attitude through the constant pain. I,  sometimes lonely and longing, in my consuming adult life and ministry, but rarely have time to stop to think about it.

Fast forward to this week. I left for 3 days to do ministry, to be with friends, to set up conferences. Life has required me to be so responsible, so task oriented, learning to go without needs being met. Little "me" time.

Ministering in California

Flying there for 3 days with meetings, personal  and strategic lunches, breakfasts and dinners, arranging conferences, teaching about communication skills, answering questions about mothering, leadership, guilt, books, education, the Lord, problems.

So often my life is fueled by adrenalin, searching through mind-files to engage with the question being asked, expending energy like money in a carnival, seeking to guide with the light pouring out of my soul with what He gave--and so serious, talk after serious talk, intentional conversation, all setting a standard my soul seems to follow obediently, step by step--one foot in front of the other. Always I enjoy these precious ones and enjoy hearing the stories. But sometimes I don't even know how drained my brain and body and heart have become amidst the path of my life.

Sometimes, sharing of dark, heart secrets that spill out slowly like a mist billowing slowly on a mountain pass in private meetings. Ideals passionately espoused amidst a call to intentional living. Disappointment spilling over through tears from misunderstandings amongst those they thought were most likely to love--fellow Christians. Divorce, abortions, anger, insecurity, failure, or inadequacy or fears--sometimes stories of redemption, love, growth, encouragement, inspiration. These the topics of my interactions, with precious ones I meet, hour upon hour. This my life in ministry. And yet....

How I love my California girls! Jeanna, one of my angel friends who dressed me like a dolly! Vicky and Lisa were her cohorts.

Yet, during a break, I was talking with three dear ones who have become sweet friends to me amidst ministry over the past few years.  "I love your necklace. What a cute shirt that is with the roses! I am so glad "feminine" is in style again. You all are so darling and fun--you need to tell me how I am supposed to dress!"

Conversations drifted to clothes, styles, contemporary expectations.

"You won't believe it, but we got a lot of what we are wearing at our church's bookstore! They have a section of clothing and jewelry that supports women in poor countries, where we have missions, so that they can be independent. All of it is produced there! We are going to take you over to the store and buy you an outfit."

And so, for almost two hours, they dressed me up. I felt like a little girl again. And I felt so very loved and blessedly noticed and  cared for! It was so much fun-necklaces--short or long, earrings dangling or studs, myriads of rainbow scarves-- maroon, navy, floral, solid, knit, silk, "That looks great." "She looks like she is sick in that color--get her something else." "Oh, that style flatters her! Let's get her two outfits!" Giggles, playing, talking-sheer fun, nothing serious, only playing and being girlfriends. I didn't even know how much I needed it. Water for my thirsty soul.

When my hostess and dear friend picked me up for dinner after our shopping was all finished, we had a leisurely few minutes together before our next meeting. All of a sudden it hit me--my mom wasn't able anymore to help me pick out my two outfits, but maybe the Lord knew deep inside I needed to know that someone still wanted me to have fun--not just responsibility--but fun, love and a memorable light-hearted afternoon. I now have two darling, speaking outfits, but I also feel noticed, cared for, and had a whole lot of unexpected fun.

Thank you, my angel friends for taking time with me for fun and for love. I love each of you so much.

Fall ~ A New Season for Heart Work--focusing on the eternal

Julian Aiden Weir  Autumn Rain The leaves are starting to turn from various shades of green to vibrant oranges, golds, and reds. Crisp morning air greets us as we close the bedroom windows, before heading downstairs to brew a hot cup of tea! A fresh, new season is just around the corner! As many families prepare to go "back to school," our hearts wonder what God has in store for us next, what classes He has enrolled us in. Is it "Patience 101" again?! Will I learn more about His love? Grace? Discipline?  I am in his school room of holiness as I model and teach my own how to walk daily with Him.

Fall has always felt to me like the real "new year" and I have great anticipation to have a new slate, with, as Anne of Green gables said, with  no mistakes made yet, all new possibilities. So it is exciting to see how the schedule will come together and what we will pursue in the way of commitments and activities.

Fall is also a strategic time to reflect on our children's character and our own. Making sure my calendar is not so crammed with activities and lessons that the only time I have with Joy  is in the car is a filter for the commitments I am willing to make.

Fall is a reflective season in which to take some time to pray over each of my children, asking the Lord for wisdom in how to help each child grow in their faith--those who are in my house and those who are far away.  I ask God to show me their potential, their gifts, their temptations, the areas in which they need to grow. Wisdom comes from the Holy Spirit, who has access to my children's hearts, minds and souls. As I read the word and pray, He impresses me with those thoughts that lead me to be a more intentional leader and mentor of each of them with their own unique personalities and needs.

Joy will finish her formal schooling in May. It will mark for me the end of my commitment to homeschooling, which started 26 years ago, so I want to end well. As an extrovert, she would like to be busy every day, every minute! Participating in a 3 practices a week drama troop, with many performances this fall (The Importance of Being Ernest), will keep her quite busy. Added to that is dance, her history group, Inklings group, piano lessons, voice and small discipleship group, and we are pretty booked--let alone my own ministry schedule which I fit in between her commitments.  She wanted to take some more outside classes (she is a driven personality--easy to finish on!)

But this will be my last focused opportunity to really drive home the deep messages of Christ, to read the last round of great books, to cultivate discussion, to build into her heart, to have those last cozy tea times, just Joy and me, and watch the Holy Spirit turn our time into memories that will feed her soul for her whole life.

So, I limited her from signing up for college pathways, the two classes her friends were taking. Why? Not because they were not good classes, but they would have robbed me from the chance to intentionally use this year to touch her heart for eternity! Probably, for me it would have been easier if she could have taken outside classes that I didn't have to teach, and I have certainly loved so many of our coop classes that she has taken.

But, I prayed about my schedule and really felt the Lord tell me to "Make time for building into her life." And so I am planning and choosing books and arranging some social gatherings in our home that will make this a great year for her and for me.

In light of this, I thought I would share with you some of my previous thoughts about my own children as I was discipling them through the teen years. Chapter 6 in The Ministry of Motherhood is devoted to inspiring a sense of purpose in our children's lives. In that chapter, I tell about how then sixteen-year-old Joel and I discussed his possible career choices. Here is an excerpt from pages 72 and 73:

Jesus' work in a person's life has always begun with a call to leave behind the goals, purposes, and distractions of this world and to say yes to a whole new life, a new way of thinking. "Follow me" is what he told the disciples as he recruited them. And they did, abandoning their fishing nets, their tax-collector's moneybags, their permanent homes, their everyday duties and pleasures. And they never went back. Sure, they still did a little fishing from time to time! But once they made the choice to follow Jesus, their lives were forever changed. They never returned to "normal."

I think this is vital for us to keep in mind as Christians and as parents. We know we are called to follow Christ, to take his message to the world, to raise our children to heed Jesus' call. But  sometimes I think we fail to consider that following the Lord might mean leaving behind the ordinary and the familiar. It means exchanging a temporal view of life for an eternal goal. And this may mean leaving behind things we really care about -- involvements and pursuits that seem important and worthwhile but may not be God's best for us.

Part of giving the gift of inspiration is helping our children understand this -- and perhaps reminding ourselves. To fulfill God's design for their lives, our precious children must at some point determine to give Jesus allegiance in every aspect of their lives. There is a cost to discipleship, and that cost is everything!

Exchanging a temporal view of life for an eternal goal. Our lives will not reflect the world's values. As mothers, we are life-givers. Our culture encourages us to live for the moment. But how does that give life? How can being selfish bring about an eternal goal of holiness? Many times we allow a behavior to continue, thinking we will "get back to it" when it is more convenient, but does that time ever come? We want to give our children every possible opportunity to be creative, to find their strengths and weaknesses. Do we ask why we are involved in so many activities? Will this produce eternal fruit? Or just weariness? Sometimes we need to take a break from our normal routine to see just how out of control we are. Sometimes the Lord allows something into our lives to slow us down, to help us focus on what He really wants us to do.

As Christian moms, our hearts' desire is to follow the Lord and do His will. We want to set a godly example for our children. God has a plan and a purpose for our lives, but we need to make ourselves available to Him. When we surround ourselves with busyness, we cannot hear His still small voice. Let's look at some Scriptures that remind us of who He wants us to be.

Some Biblical Wisdom

Philippians 1:6 says, "For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus."

What will God do in your life? When will He finish that work? How does this encourage you in your walk with Him and in your children's spiritual growth?

Meditate on these words from Isaiah 55:8-9: "'For My thoughts are not your thoughts,

Nor are your ways My ways,' declares the Lord.

'For as the heavens are higher than the earth,

So are My ways higher than your ways

And My thoughts than your thoughts.'"

Can you think of a situation where God's ways were not your ways? Why are His ways better than our ways?

Ephesians 2:10 is a great reminder that the Lord has a plan for our lives:

"For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them."

Who are we? We are created in Christ for what? Who prepared the works for us to do? What work has God created you to do? Does God know why He has given your child his or her particular personality? Does He have a plan for leading them to their life's work? How can you encourage each child to pursue what God has uniquely prepared him or her to do?

Application

Put together a puzzle with your children. Leave a couple of pieces out so the puzzle cannot be completed. Use this to explain:

• How God has specific good works He wants each of us to do. If we do not do those works, there will be "holes" in our ministry to others? What will be the holes in the lives of others that could have been filled if we had followed God?.
• How God wants us to surrender our entire lives, not just certain pieces. He wants us to be complete in Him.
• If our life was a puzzle, God would keep working in our life until it was complete. He would not give up!

As you pray over your children, take time to listen to God's voice. Is this the school year to simplify and focus on things of eternal value instead of trying to do it all? Is this the season to fall into His arms and just rest? May the Lord give you wisdom as you seek His purpose in your life!

Whole Heart Mom's conferences coming soon!

This Month at Whole Heart

This time of year is always the most visionary at Whole Heart, as we try to envision and plan the coming 12 months of ministry events, books, speaking, and more. We have to jump in with both feet and all hands on deck (that sounds a bit awkward, but you get the picture). It's all we can do to keep up with God as he leads us forward. In all honesty, though, this is also our most challenging time of year financially when we need, more than any other time of the year, partners in ministry who share our hearts for Christian parents and families (see "Learn More" note at the bottom of this letter). We appreciate your prayers and support.  

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Whole Heart EVENTS...

The Mom Heart Conference season is coming together. We'll have online registration pages up early in October, but here are the dates and states so you can make plans to join us. We also have some one-day Mominars and speaking events on the calendar:

2010 October 8-9: Chicago, IL, Apologia Live, Sally October 12-21: Northeast speaking trip, Sally (* see below) October 21-23: Relevant Blogging Conference, PA, Sally November 6: Nashville, TN, Mominar, Fellowship Bible Church 2011 January 22: Colorado Springs, CO, Mominar (tentative) February 4-5: Irvine, CA, MH Conference, Mariners Church February 18-19: Irving/DFW, TX, MH Conference, LC Marriott March 4-5: Raleigh-Durham, NC, MH Conference, Hilton RDU March 18-19: Open Date, MH Conference, To Be Announced* Sally will be traveling in the northeast with her history group in Philadelphia, Boston, and New York City. She is speaking in Boston and New York, and is willing to speak in Philadelphia, or meet with your group one of the evenings. Please send her an email to let her know if you would like to have her speak to your group!  

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Whole Heart ONLINE...

We're still navigating a major online makeover. For those who care about such things, we're moving all of our online ministries to the WordPress platform--websites, blogs, and pages. The primary website at WholeHeart.org has already been moved, but we still have a lot of work to do on it (graphic updates, new pages, and more). A new website for Mom Heart Ministry at MomHeart.org will launch very soon, and a Mom-e-Net social network for mothers at MomHeart.net is under construction. Sally's blog, ITakeJoy.com, will move to WordPress this month, and we'll launch Disciplinology.com and other new blogs throughout the fall.

The main websites will also get a full e-commerce makeover, with upgraded webstores. We hope to have all of Sally's messages since 1996 online soon for ordering as single CDs or MP3s. We'll also be updating our Facebook presence for both Whole Heart and Mom Heart, and coordinating our blogs and social media. All that to say, stay tuned...we're getting there.  

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Whole Heart PRESS...

Whole Heart Press is caught in a publishing "Catch 22" for the moment. We have several core books that have gone out of print that need to be edited, redesigend, and printed. We need them for the ministry to make money, but we need money to make them for the ministry. Chicken...egg. We're believing God for the funds to put these books back in print. Here are the books waiting patiently in line:

Educating the WholeHearted Child, 3rd Edition (Clay) -- Anticipating a December release from Apologia Press. Heartfelt Disciplne (Clay) -- Needs to be edited and reset for a fall or early 2011 release. The Mom Walk (Sally) -- Needs to be edited and reset for an early 2011 release. Journeys of Faithfulness (Sarah) -- Being rewritten for a pending contract. Early 2012 release. Just David (Clay, ed.) -- Needs to be reset for a softcover edition for early 2011 release.

We are also working on new books, but you'll have to wait until they're farther along to hear about them. We also have many public domain titles we'd like to put back in print, but we need to hire someone to do that work. And, we're working on books for Mom Heart Ministry. So many projects...so little us!  

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Whole Heart MINISTRIES...

Whole Heart Ministries is an umbrella for different ministry efforts to encourage and equip Christian parents, which include:

Mom Heart Ministry -- This new small groups initiative for mothers continues to grow and expand. Although it is under the umbrella of WHM, it is swiftly becoming its own ministry. Sally's Mom Heart Mom-e-Letter will focus on developments with Mom Heart. Since you received this email, you will also receive the Mom Heart Mom-e-Letter. We recently had 50 women in our home in Monument for two days and three nights of Mom Heart Leader Intensive Training. Many of those women will help us develop Mom Heart Ministry with mom blogs, a Mom-e-Zine, the new website and social net, Bible studies, and more.

Whole Heart World -- Sally has encouraged parents and mothers in China, the Middle East, Australia, and New Zealand in recent years. Several of her books are in six foreign languages. We are looking into making ebook versions of our core books available to overseas parents. We are just one family trying to minister to other families, yet God is using us around the world.  

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Please remember Whole Heart Ministries in your prayers. We are trusting God to provide for our financial needs this month so we can continue to help Christian parents raise wholehearted Christian children. May God richly bless you and your children as we enter a new season. Wholehearted blessings in Christ.

Clay Clarkson

LEARN MORE: If you would like to learn more about how to help Whole Heart Ministries financially at this time, please let us know so we can add you to our Whole Heart Partners email list. If you click here to let us know of your interest, we will send you a recent email that was sent only to our Partners list.

MAKE A DONATION: if you would like to help now, click here to make a donation now by using Paypal. Thank you for partnering with us to encourage and equip Christian parents around the world. Whole Heart Ministries is a 501c3 nonprofit ministry, so your donation is fully tax-deductible. As a faith ministry, we depend in part on the generous gifts of supporters that enable us to fulfill the mission God has given us to strengthen families. We appreciate your partnership with us.

SEARCH AND GIVE: You can also help Whole Heart, and yourself, simply by searching on the Internet. Every time you do a search using Goodsearch.com Whole Heart will receive a donation. How easy is that?! You can search from their online site, or easily download their GoodSearch Toolbar and search right from your desktop (that's what I do). To get started, go now to Good. When GoodSearch asks, "WHO DO YOU GOODSEARCH FOR?" simply type in "Whole Heart Ministries" and start searching and giving. Easy. You can also use GoodShop.com to receive great deals and discounts, and the online site sends us a gift for us sending them a customer. GoodSearch.com helps thousands of charities and ministries, and has a sterling reputation. It's just a little bit from each search, but the more who use it, the more it helps. Thanks for helping!

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in times of trouble

Nicolaes Maes Dutch Painter Woman seeking God, as we have all sought Him throughout the ages.

Late Wednesday evening found us drinking hot chocolate, talking lively as somehow, stories and history of our past started bubbling out of each of our children. These stories focussed on a number of times when our family has been injured by other Christians or greatly criticized unjustly by others. It is painful at times to see the results of hurts through the eyes of my children when I know that they have been deeply wounded in our own journey towards the Lord.

From the beginning of scripture, we see that evil and tests are around every corner. Cain killed Abel out of jealousy. There are Ahabs; Jezebels; wicked and selfish kings, including Saul who was after David to kill him; giants in the land, Hamans who want to kill all the jews; Judas's and Job's friends who misunderstand; Pharisees--God's leaders--who become the murders of the righteous.

I did not know or understand this when I first started out in ministry. I was shocked by how very cruel people could be--poisonous in some cases. There have been trials in our lives that I will probably never write about, because I believe loyal love is an important standard in my life and there are those I am not willing to expose. Yet, the battles our family has been through are numerous and quite difficult.

And, in a few cases, the wounds are still fresh enough on our children's hearts, that I can still see they have been deeply hurt. "No wonder I have been tempted to wonder if God loves us or to doubt in people's ability to be faithful. If you look at our lives, it is amazing that we have even kept beileving God, with all that He has put us through!"

Yet, these have been the stories of our lives. It is in the midst of trial that our children really see what is is like to trust God. They will have battles if they intend to live godly lives. They learn how to live godly lives by hearing our words as well are watching our faith.

There are so many other ways to experience deep pain and sadness.  There are wars, illnesses, lack of money, wickedness seemingly going unhindered, no community, loneliness, heartache.

Yet, above and beyond all, there is God.

I love Psalm 22, the prophetic psalm that was on Jesus's lips when he died.

"My God, my god, why have you forsaken me?"--this to the jews was the title of the Psalm as they knew the first lines to define what psalms were being addressed. And so Jesus had this as a comfort in his heart as he heard it all the years, because the first line did define for him the temptation he had at the cross.  Verse 2 says, "I cry by day, but you do not answer, And by night, but I have not rest,

but then the next verse says it all, "Yet, thou art holy, Oh thou who art enthroned on the praises of Israel, in thee our fathers trusted. They trusted and you delivered them. To you they cried out, and were delivered; In you they trusted and were not disappointed."

This is our hope--we call out to God. We call out to Him who is our Father and longs for us to come to Him. He is faithful. He is holy. He is deeply involved in our lives.

There are those battles that go on in our heart, when no one else can see--Is God really good? Does He really care? Can I really trust Him? Is He ever going to answer our prayer? Can He forgive me, again?

And then we are tempted to take things into our own hands--whatever that might be. Why do I know this? Because I have lived in this place many times.

Even now, our family is in a crisis. Yet, always we have a choice. Will we trust God. Will we celebrate His reality? Will we believe in the darkness even when we cannot see any way out?

Fatih is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. We believe, not in what is around us or what we can see. We believe in what we cannot see--God, His promises, His faithfulness, His ways which are different and above our ways--this is what His Word tells us. Will we listen to Satan's voice, the accusations that God does not see us? that God does not care? That God cannot help us this time?

Faith--This is the only way to please God. To trust Him. Without faith, it is impossible to please Him, we read in Hebrews. Faith is brightest when we live in the darkest hours--the most impossible time to believe.

It is why I began this blog, I take joy! Through all the difficulties of our lives, I did not want to be overcome by the darkness, I did not want to be a victim. I made a decision: I will take joy, I will choose light, I will live in forgiveness.

I choose to believe in His goodness and not look at the dark. I choose to celebrate life because I am redeemed and Paul tells me in Romans 8 that nothing can separate me from God's love. I choose to be gracious because God has been gracious to me.

God allows us these trials that we may live boldy before others to show that we are not those who shrink back, but those who believe.

But God also cares deeply for us--He was a man of sorrows, acquainted with grief. He understands your wounds. He cares deeply that you are feeling pressure, hurt, sadness or harm. He deeply loves you. But we must open the eyes of our heart and look for that love and wait for His strength and answers.

It is why I wrote Dancing with my Father. God, my father, is in charge. He knows what He is doing. He knows what He is building into our lives when we do not understand what is going on. I will hold His hand, I will praise His name, I will wait for His timing, because He will be faithful.

Though we are all tempted to trust in man or money or despair in our lives, may God be our hope today. May we bring Him deep pleasure as He sees us praising Him, loving Him, hoping in Him, so that when He has brought forth justice in our lives and answered our longings and prayers, we will have had the privilege of living a story which will indeed show His reality and His faithfulness to be true.

Hold on and worship all you precious ones who are living in the midst of great difficulties. He cares for you. He is with you. He loves you. May you and may I and my family always rest in Him.

We will be like Jesus in the prophetic psalm 22: 22 and following:

I will tell of Thy name to my brethren, In the midst of the assembly, I will praise Him, and stand in awe of Him, ..., For He has not despised nor abhored the affliction of the afflicted. Neither has he hidden His face from him; When when he cried to Him for help, he heard.

I am praying for so many of you today who are hurting. May you know His love, generosity, grace and peace and may you feel His abiding love. Grace and peace.

Amazing Music: The source of health and academic excellence!

Jean-Marc Nattier French painter

Every night at my dinner table when I grew up, my mom would light candles on the dining room table and put on some kind of music. My father used to play a "horn" as he would call it, and was of the Glen Miller sort of musician. He wiggled and danced and always whistled through life. A businessman in the day, but played at life and always loved having music around.

This is one habit I picked up and found myself providing in my own home: music every night--even if we had cereal or toast and cheese, we just made music and candles and talking an anchor in our day. Without realing it, this music had profound influence on my children's tastes and appetites on their lives. I then began to see that music helped in so many areas.

Giving my children Michael Card's lullabys at night (sleep sound in Jesus) when they went to bed, Steve Green's music to verses for children as they readied for bed; or Avalon or Rich Mullins or Josh Groban when we washed dishes or cleaned house, seemed to smooth the way.

Riding in cars on long trips to conferences found all of us constantly listening to and sharing music of every sort--from classical to celtic to Christian worship music to indy artists. We all got through so much of life with music as our companion. With Clay as a guitarist and both of us singers, we had melodies surrounding our home morning, noon and night.

Scripture tells us to, "make melody in our hearts to God," and he commanded the Levites to have those who played music every hour of the day. Angels sang at the birth of Jesus, David had an orchestra playing with choir singing when bringing in the arc of the Lord. Music honors God, and somehow is a mysterious part of life and beauty for us in His design and creation. Even the stars sang, Job tells us, at creation--melody must have been in God's heart from the beginning.

How fun it was to me to read these articles and see just how important music is to our brains and to helping cultivate happiness, well-being and even undergirds intelligence development. Enjoy these articles.

Amazing Power of Music Revealed

Classical Music: An effective antidepressant