Integrity: Knowing what is right and living outwardly by these Internal standards

http://youtu.be/ekcdy9fO2oU

Teaching children to know what is right and then to have the integrity to do what is right.

The word integrate comes from a root word which means undivided. The moral sense of integrity, then, insinuates teaching our children to know and understand what is true and right and then to live accordingly, without a divided heart.

24 Family Way # 21: We do what we know is right regardless what others do or say.

Right is always right even if no one is doing it, wrong is always wrong even if everyone is doing it.

Memory Verse: Psalm 1:1-2

"How blessed is the one who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked, nor stand in the path of sinners, nor sit in the seat of scoffers! But His delight is in the law of the Lord and in this law He meditates day and night."

When we teach our children moral and spiritual integrity, we give them foundations of strength and wisdom to face any issue that may come up in their lives.

We teach them not to walk--move, travel, follow the road of righteousness--not to walk in the counsel--the wisdom and advise of the wicked. The voices of the world, wicked and some just short-sighted and immature, are coming out of media, the internet, television, movies so quickly no one even notices anymore. But if our children want to have a way "not" to walk in the counsel of the world, they must have the counsel of the Bible in their minds so they can walk in the path of the righteous.

Standing in the path of sinners---often, we see Christians standing right at the point of compromise--in the path of sinners--maybe not sinning or being immoral, exactly, but certainly not distinguishing themselves as holy and set apart for God's purposes. They want to be liked, to be like the world, fit into the world because it is not easy to stand alone. Yet, the godly cannot, may not stand in the pathway of sinners and dwell there without becoming compromised.

Not sit in the seat of scoffers. We are also not called to point fingers, cast judgement, criticize others as we sit passively by pontificating. We are called to redeem, to bring light, to counteract the messages of culture.

But His delight is in the law of the Lord. Delight insinuates pleasure, something I seek gladly, something I greatly enjoy. The godly person seeks with all of his heart and with gladness, the wisdom of God, the truth of God, the ways of God.

For our children to have integrity, and to live undivided, they must understand the strength, sure foundation and nuance of the word of God. And then, this child will be secure and blessed.

A letter from me to you--and catching up on life as I have been living it!

My bed and breakfast in the Alps

Every once in a while, I feel the urge to report what I am really doing in life and what I am really thinking about. It is not that I haven't really been engaged on my blog and with my friends out in the internet world. I have made some "live" forays into my world of friends, (attempted Google hangout, launching 10 Gifts, writing some articles now and then)---you! But mostly I have been busy with life, my children, out of town company, writing 4 projects at once (oh my poor brain--ideals always get me into trouble.), leading my local Bible study of 180 women, and enjoying life on my own terms.

I have been wishing to write more about growing convictions, deep convictions from times gone by, and other articles that I feel could be life-changing for many. But I am unwilling to give up what I consider my life priorities just to spend time on the internet, which must rob me from some of the building life part now.

So what have I been doing?

Austrian Flower Market

I took a 3 week mission/pleasure trip to Vienna and Poland and spent time in my old haunts, met with old friends, shopped, drank lots and lots of coffee, hiked in the vineyards and mountains, ate amazing meals with stimulating people--(I love the international world where many of my friends read broadly, travel world-wide, live by convictions and ideals and have a bigger picture than their local world.) This is the place I cut my teeth on life-values and life-foundations, so I must go back once in a while to feel a part of my true self, that sometimes gets lost in the local. And so a part of my soul began to come back to life that had gotten lost in the mundane for a while.

 Sukiennice, Krakow, Poland--just down the street where I attended University Classes and near my apartment..

Important conversations there: My friend and I talked about how living by faith and taking risks had made all the difference in our lives in seeing God work in amazing ways. One must live to serve Him and go wherever He says in order to see Him work in a supernatural way.

 

I flew Joy home from college because we will all be apart from each other for Thanksgiving for the first time.

Important conversations: The foundations that are invested in a child's mind and soul, inform how excellently and deeply they live when they are making decisions as a young adult. Children without a broad understanding of the Bible, without having served many people, without having read and thought and discussed and owned convictions, do not have the moral, spiritual or emotional strength to stand on their own when it comes to living a set apart (holy) life of excellence for God. (Joy is an RA over 40 young women and is in leadership every day with them, and in speech and debate and is growing like a weed in her walk with God.) This from her living with them the past 3 months. (Thus--more impetus for me having written 10 Gifts of Wisdom---so so so important to train your children in Biblical virtues in this day and time.)

Flew Nathan home this week because I wanted one last shot at him alone before he gets married.

Important conversations: The foundations of reading scripture every day when he was growing up speaks to his life every day that he is living in Hollywood and has guided his steps to walk with God, to follow wisdom and to live for the kingdom. He says foundations have made him the man he is. (Again, he validated the 10 Gifts--he sees so many compromising every day, wounding themselves.)

Also, how people seem to think "professional Christians"--those in full time ministry, are the ones who are supposed to be about God's business in the world--or that leadership and stewardship is just a personality issue (a rationalization of course) but how few people he knows live purposefully and how few in his life have vision and passion for living for Christ. (seems all of my kids feel strongly how hard it is to find kindred, godly friends who share their values, but still they have a vision that keeps them moving forward and how much our family's constant gatherings help give accountability to keeping going--family is the glue.)

(must admit I am so very sweetly and humbly blessed to see my children all coming to this conclusion--the power of family culture to keep them growing as Christians.)

Blogs I wish I had time to write:

The pace at which we lead life and the adrenalin we expend is simply ridiculous

Compartmentalizing Christianity--and compromising life every day amongst believers--you can't say you love Christ and then neglect your children or get divorced without just cause or commit adultery and then just hope an apology will do or sleep with your boyfriend in between weekly church services or engage in pornography or have an appetite for sexually explicit movies and just count on grace, etc......... (I go to church, I give my ten percent, I study the Bible and pray---and thinking that is enough, when God wants people who are alive with His kingdom purposes, those who have a heart for redeeming the world, those who will bow their knee to do His will whatever it takes--like serving children, staying married, choosing to seek to be excellent and not compromising morally, and determining to become a speaker/teacher/leader because so many are lost. God will not  be compromised--He is holy, He wants us to walk with Him and honor Him--He is sick of offerings without heart.

Teaching your young adult children that morality is not an action to be defined but a heart issue of purity to pursue--a roadway to walk upon. 

For this is the will of God, your sanctification; that is, that you abstain from sexual immorality; 4 that each of you know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, 5 not in lustful passion, like the Gentiles who do not know God; 6 and that no man transgress and defraud his brother in the matter because the Lord is the avenger in all these things, just as we also told you before and solemnly warned you.  For God has not called us for the purpose of impurity, but in sanctification.  So, he who rejects this is not rejecting man but the God who gives His Holy Spirit to you. I Thess. 4: 3-8

That if a man or woman is asking you or giving you permission to compromise and go down a road of lust, passion, then that person does not walk with God. Of course I believe people can be forgiven, but there is a lot of foolish understanding about this area (what is too much? how far can I go?--These are not the right questions--sex is reserved for marriage for all of the great purposes of marriage and family.   One walking with the Lord should be moving toward a pure heart, possessing his body in sanctification and honor----someday when I have time, I would love to write more about how to build a vision for marriage, family, life, sex that gives strength, hope and purpose instead of just conforming to the "world's values."

Idolatry of any kind: Cherishing anything in your heart that you think will bring you fulfillment apart from God Himself, is a false hope. Supposing that getting a child married, or having popularity in the blogging world or having money or the right husband or different children, "or or or" will ever fill that large vacuum or fear in your heart that makes you long for more--only God and His will and ways can fill those longings--anything else you talk yourself into justifying, will, in the end, bring you unhappiness and emptiness--and often then, people blame God for ill-consequences when God would never have led them to make such pre-emptive decisions.

The power and influence of a godly home--why having lots of children is God's idea and such a blessing because my kids are my best friends and such a blessing to me personally, why marriage and family is the way to preserve life and righteousness--getting back to the design, and how not to listen to the voices of  Christians and to the world-unless there is integrity, history of life, and context of historical scripture---laws do not define spirituality.

But, if I keep my priorities centered, (God, Clay, my kids, my family and then ministry), I do not have time to accomplish all that I wish or to do what it would take to be more popular or successful as a blogger, writer, leader---first things first--my priority people and God always, always take precedence.

Westminster Abbey

Next week, I am so very excited because I will go to England with Joel and Sarah to a 2 day C.S. Lewis conference in London where C.S. Lewis will be placed with honor in West Minster Abbey. (I will be gone for 10 glorious days.) The church will be closed for 2 days for the conference and if you have never been to Westminster Abbey, it sings with history and heroism and faith. I had a free plane ticket and free hotel points and so I cannot wait to be there with two of my favorite people in the world. (And I have the best husband in the world who blesses me to go while he stays home and remains responsible to hold the fort and the conferences and ministry down.--Thanks for being my husband, Clay.)

So now you know a few of the ways I have been living my life--along with great mountain walks, always books, homemade meals by candlelight, lots of visiting and sharing life with kindred spirits who stimulate me--most of all, Clay and my sweet children, sweet movies that bring tears, always, 24/7  music we listen to, and being outside with the wintry stars, changing leaves, traveling through the Alps, looking at God's handiwork, and thanking God for my life.

Too long, I know, but wanted you to know some of what is really going on in my life. Have a great weekend!

*used blog 11/4/21 Favoring The Broken Child

blessed

“Blessed are you who are poor,for yours is the kingdom of God.

Blessed are you who hunger now,for you will be satisfied. 

Blessed are you who weep now,for you will laugh.

Blessed are you when people hate you,

when they exclude you and insult you

and reject your name as evil,

because of the Son of Man.

Rejoice in that day

and leap for joy 

because great

is your reward

in heaven. "

-Luke 6:20-23

It always blows me away that our God has such a compassionate, loving heart. He counts each of our tears, keeps a record of our heartaches, knows our battles, and cares deeply for all of our hurts. Not only does God love those who face trials, but He favors them.

It is easy for us to misunderstand the idea of God favoring any of us. We all wish to be His favorite and hope that He understands us, but often we shrink back as though he is somehow put off by our inability to "be perfect.. As a mother, you have probably at one point or another had your children ask which child is your "favorite." Of course, we don't have a favorite child. We love all of our children so very deeply, and our love for each of them is so unique as no two children will be the same.

However, think back to a time when one of your children was really sick. Possibly battling a bad cold, the flu, a stomach virus, or maybe something even more severe. When you have a sick child in your home, where is the majority of your attention? Who are your eyes glued to? Where is your heart's love and concern? Our immediate attention favors the child in need. This doesn't mean that we have a favorite child, and it does not diminish our love for the other sweet ones in the home. It simply means that we must focus in on the broken child. Our thoughts are of this child.

God is the same toward us.

When you are struggling financially and don't know how your family will make it through, God is favoring you, because you need his special attention and care. When you are hungry (physically, emotionally, or spiritually), God is waiting to bless you, because as a good Father, He wants to meet your needs and care for you. When you are weeping, God is weeping with you and He is anticipating the day when you will laugh again. When your heart is broken, God's eyes are focusing in on you.

Don't become overwhelmed and consumed by fear in the midst of your difficulty, but remember that God is favoring His broken children.

And understand, He will never, ever forget you, no matter what. As Isaiah tells us:

"Can a womanforgether nursingchildAnd havenocompassionon the sonof her womb?Eventhesemay forget,but I will not forgetyou.

1"Behold,I have inscribedyou on the palms[of My hands];" Isaiah 49-15-16

God favors you, because you are HIs, and His heart is towards his

God favors us and cares for us, even when we fail, because it is the sick who need a physician, and  because we are His own, He will always be deeply concerned about our welfare. Today, He has His eye on you, and if you are broken, He is there to feeling compassion and care for His child who is ailing. His eye is on His child in need. Look for him to care for you as a mother cares for her own. He will never forget you.

Tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes in it!

Tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes in it---at least I hope so!

Disaster! Last night was not at all what I hoped for us to be able to talk. Tempted to give up---but I shall keep going and finding a better server and host for our sweet mamas who gathered!

Please forgive me!

I am sooo sorry about last night! OOOohhhhhhh my! What difficulties we had. About 4 people were accepted to Google and then it started crashing. We didn't know that we would have 1100, as many signed up at the last, and  women coming for the hang out and I guess that if everyone registers at once, it causes the server to crash.

I didn't know we were on so that everyone could see us, fumbling and bumbling around---another part I was not expecting to be recorded for life! So if you have the Google hangout, you get to see us figuring it out, and all sorts of antics!

Please forgive us for all who were disappointed! I was quite disappointed, as well, as I do not want to waste anyone's time. But, someone told me it was on youtube and so I just started in and talked and talked.

We had our 6 topical areas and verses all arranged, but I just decided to jump in as my host was distracted with all the technicalities. And so I quickly tried to say many things I had prepared in the middle of the technological difficulties. Hope some of it blesses!

For those of you who didn't get to see it and want to watch it, you can go to the connection below, and I will embed it to my blog tomorrow after I get some sleep.

Tomorrow is another day with no mistakes in it.....yet! Said Anne of Green Gables! I thought of her tonight! We shall try again and have people sign on 15 minutes early next time.

Again, I am sooo sorry this happened.

Fast forward to about 31 minutes and that is around where it starts!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AC6f7YiNFAA&feature=share

Remember--it officially starts at around 26 minutes! Hope somehow this is encouraging!

Hangout LIVE with Me Tonight!

UPDATE LINK - Click HERE

Motherhood matters because we are the ones being used by God to form the foundations of heart, mind and soul of our children--and their story will be told through out eternity.

Raising godly children in your home has never been more important. Join me tonight (November 4th) for a discussion about how to build a home, an atmosphere and a message that will shape your children's hearts for eternity.

For many years, I have hosted studies, leadership intensives and Bible studies in my home. I cannot host everyone in my home, so I thought I would bring my home to you! Join me and tell all of your friends about our evening to discuss these where to start in becoming a mom who passes on wisdom, and how to last in this demanding role of motherhood. We shall have a grand time together.

UPDATE LINK - Click HERE

The Transforming Power of Graciousness: Mentoring Monday Way #20

http://youtu.be/aW7ozuscefE The video above was recorded almost 2 years ago. Women all over the world tell us they are sad that they can't go to a mom's conference because we do not have them in their areas. For several years, Clay and I have been trying to figure out how to reach more women with e-conferences, materials, videos--and tryig to figure out what is sustainable for us and for you. I have gotten so much great feedback from the webcast we did last week, so we are trying to figure out how to do more. But I may even try my hand at some podcasts soon. Let me know if you like these ways of our reaching out.

I am excited to pursue more ways to help, inspire and encourage women--especially in this time when babies and mamas are not affirmed for the amazingly strategic role they have in the lives of future generations through the sweet ones in their home. Pray for us as we develop new ways. We are hosting our last Mom Heart Conference--celebrating year 20. But we have plans for more conferences up our sleeves--if God works  it out with us.

This fall, I will be going through the study guide and issues of the Own Your Life Book by using the planner as a guide, alongside the book Own Your Life. I will have both audio and written articles to inspire. Hope you will join me for this. Thanks for the great mail I have received about the conference and the study guide. So glad it is helping and you have enjoyed it. Below is another look at way 20 because I wanted you to have the video to see that we have been working on more media for a couple of years. It is coming!

And oh, the picture below--wouldn't it be great if we all met in a beautiful old castle and had tea and talk together. Not quite my life, is it yours? Blessings today!

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John Robert Dicksee

Gracious: characterized by kindness, thoughtfulness, and warm courtesy.

Tea-time-relationships: serving someone thoughtfulness, time and kindness has opened many hearts in my life-time.

"Graciousness is that quality in a person's behavior towards others that shows them their worth, their value in God's eyes and honors them based on God's image and imprint on their lives. "

Sally C.

WAY # 20: We choose to be gracious, even when we do not feel like it! 

Memory Verse:

"Let love of the brethren continue. 2 Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for by this some haveentertained angels without knowing it." Hebrews 13:1-2

Deep throated shouting, the shrill screams of a woman, dust flying, crowds running to see the spectacle, left the terrified woman fearing for her life. The Pharisees were bringing a woman caught in adultery and were attempting to test Jesus to see just how liberal He was--to see if He would defy the law and extend his hand of grace to a woman waiting to be killed by the stoning the law required.

Perhaps this woman was poor and had stooped to make money the wrong way. Perhaps she was abused, or deeply wounded and lonely. Or even just selfish and caught in lust. But, in the crowd of men, screaming, jeering people, she must have felt terror, shame, fear and grief all at once.

Jesus, the God who had formed her, looked into her eyes, saw her heart, knew all of her days and acts, and knew her deep need for forgiveness. I imagine Him giving His hand to her to pull her off the ground, helping her brush the dust off of her garment. And then, he extended a gentle but authoritative voice of graciousness.

"Straightening up, Jesus said to her, “Woman, where are they? Did no one condemn you?” 11 She said, “No one, Lord.” And Jesus said, “I do not condemn you, either." John 8: 10

Jesus, the perfect one, who "while we were yet sinners, died for us." Jesus, who, "although He existed in the form of God, did not regard equality with God to be grasped." Jesus, "while being reviled, did not revile in return, but kept trusting Himself to God."

When Jesus looks into the eyes of my heart, He invites me in--to know His love, His wisdom, His truth, His admonition, His correction. Always, He is gentle and meek, as that is His way. Being in His presence does not call me to want to sin more, quite the opposite. His example of dignifying me and all of us of His children by seeking us out, redeeming us, being gentle and long-suffering with us, causes me to want to be more righteous, more sacrificial, more generous, more of a servant. His life transforms me. But His life is one of gracious behavior.

How many people are in our lives who have felt the sting of condemnation, criticism, abuse and we might be the only ones who show them the gentle, gracious, humble love of God.

When we teach our children to be gracious, we are teaching them:

Not to judge but to see themselves as those who extend the supernatural forgiveness of God

Teaching them not to think about themselves but others

Training them to have self-control over their emotions--to choose to be gracious as a part of the values that inform their behavior

Showing them how to face the world as Jesus did--not as a legalistic Pharisee, but as the servant King

When someone is king or thoughtful or honoring of me, it ministers to me greatly. In a world of cynicism, easy judgement on facebook, (I cringe every time someone easily criticizes me--especially when many of my critics have never even met me.), and a world of back-biting and gossip, the graciousness of God which honors a person because God has honored them, is transforming and will draw others to Christ.

And so, we treat our children with respect, serve them in humility, choose to use honorable words to our husbands, to friends, because when they learn this attribute of God, they will become those who win the souls of others who are so longing for someone to validate their worth.

This is something we practice, we grow in. If you are like me, you blow it and lose your patience. But God Himself, humble, bowing His knee in the dirty ground, asks us to do as He did. The more I practice and ponder this attribute of His behavior, the more amazed I am that He would ever forgive me--but in knowing His gentle, dignified and generous honoring of His very own children, I have come to love Him more and appreciate my salvation more deeply because I understand each day how much I do not deserve it.

May God give each of us the strength today to behave in a gracious way, so that the world may see what Jesus is like through us every day.

**************************************************************************************

Here is the study guide that I will use this fall.

Order HERE

*used blog 10/30/21 Home is about the art of life, Not about the perfection!

Joel, my song boy. Let the music and laughter flow.

A few years ago, we were  visiting a family and everything in the home--I should say, estate, was perfect. A garden without weeds, a home in perfect order, a meal with no mess as all pots and pans had been washed and all put away. Yet, something about the environment seemed sterile and stiff to Clay and me and to our children. We did feel that the children were quite stiff and formal, and seemed  afraid to move out of the context of "reserved politeness."  The atmosphere seemed sterile, and there was something uncomfortable to all of us--like a mysterious air of performance and judgment. The mom repeated three times, "I am so exhausted, all the time."

We all felt the strange atmosphere of stress and strain, even in the midst of perfect order,  and we talked about it as we left in the car because it was all so right and yet felt so wrong--the atmosphere of strain almost palpable.

There seemed to be form without art or life.

I am not condemning order, how i love it! Or high ideals! I am guilty of high ideals. But if the ideals consist of performance and not heart, all will be lost.And that is what it felt like to all of us while we were there. And frankly, we all felt a subtle pressure to perform and not say the wrong thing!

What an attitude we sometimes carry about God in our hearts, as though he is some kind of cross, angry man, terminally disappointed in us for not being more perfect. He is not crossing his arms, looking scornfully down His face at us saying, "Well, I was going to encourage you today and tell you how much I love you. But I can't--look at that pile on your desk, shocked at that pile laundry, I am suspicious because you are laughing too much today!"

Instead He is saying, "Woohoo! You sat with your child and watched me paint a sunset! You were patient with that spilled milk and fuss one more time--you listened to that weepy teen and didn't even get correct him, even though you were exhausted! You are my precious one and I love  that you are doing your best. I love you. I am with you, I am proud of you for keeping going!"

A home is a place of life filled by a mother whose life is contagious because of her sparkle in the midst of messes, her laughter in the midst of duty, her song pervading the whole place--the music, feasts, art, joy of life--flowing out of a heart that has found this joy in her God.

‎"To build a home of ideals means a life of sacrifice. It means a lot of work, and it's never going to be over. These ideals don't come easily to anyone; they come through battle. It's an illusion to think that building a place of beauty ever happens naturally to anyone; it happens little by little ... through hard work ... when we cultivate our souls, our kids will have something to draw from .. the house with the life of God isn't a perfect house, it's a redeemed house! It's not a home without sin, or without messes or without spilled milk, but we redeem one more moment, in the joy of living with Him, and that moment becomes a memory, an unspoken message that lasts for life... " Mission of Motherhood

Sally Clarkson

So, today, it is not about perfection, but about peace, hope, life, vision and love. Today, in the midst of all the messes, smile, laugh, sing and dance to the rhythms of God's singing.

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We are living in ponderous times and sometimes it is overwhelming. Monday night, I will be talking about some of the things that make us feel so desperate and the ways we can keep going and move to hopefulness. There is hope ---and hope keeps us moving ahead, one day at a time. Mentoring Monday night--also, developing habits of excellence in your children's lives. http://www.hangoutwithsally.com/?whw_hangout=6®ister

If you register, you will get an email telling you the information you need to be with us live. Joining us costs you nothing--it's just to make it available to you so you can watch it online. Hope you can be there!

Casting a Vision that Captures the Heart

"Education is not the filling of a pail, but the lighting of a fire!"

William Butler Yeats

Today, so many youth and college students regularly leave their faith behind, as they confront the world and its messages. Why, when so many good families have taken the time to build the messages and love faithfully?

As I ponder this dilemma, I think there are two reasons. One is that religion cannot just be indoctrination of thought. It must be a real, contagious message  about the reality of God that captures the heart, because there are so many messages screaming out to them in media.

And the second, is that we were born for community--aunts, uncles, grandmas, grandfathers, neighbors and friends--close by and living in common purpose and belonging. All of us, young adults especially, were built for relationship--love, affirmation, encouragement, belonging. And so we must build these two components as a visual and actual reality in our lives as much as possible--even if we have to build our own community with friends or those in our lives.  As we reflect on the life of Jesus, ...,

Dusty, rutted Roman roads were filled with clatter of wagons of market goods for sale, donkeys carrying burdens of farm vegetables, caged fowl squawking  and  horses mounted by  menacing Roman soldiers, mulling around in the noisy marketplace of Jerusalem. And yet, it was here, in this oppressed, unknown, seemingly insignificant hamlet that a worldwide revolution would begin that would rock the world forever.

An obscure teacher, rabbi over common fishermen,  tax collectors and mere women, would spark a fire in the hearts of those hungry souls that would turn the world upside down.

Those caught in the fray of mundane life longed for something more, to be a part of a life that held meaning besides grasping day to day for enough to eat, a way to pay bills.

And so, the secret, underground movement was ripe for the times in which it was birthed.

"Follow me and I will make you fishers of men."

Always, Jesus' message was about casting a vision that would capture the hearts and imaginations of men and women, their hearts were stirred and their fellowship around what gave them meaning together.

Always, always the message of Christ was missional--Go! Influence! Bring light! Redeem! Become a part of a movement of the Spirit of God blowing through the lives of people all over the world. Take over the darkness with your light--become redeemers! Still, today, amidst the mundane, hearts long to be ignited with the passion, purpose and influence that will continue to transform this world of darkness into a place of light and hope--and all of us have a part to play.

These were the transforming messages, challenges, vision statements. And I would snuggle up on the couch, wide-eyed children squishing around me, Jesus has a special mission for each of you-Sarah, Joel, Nathan, Joy--to accomplish in the world. You will meet people that will need only you to be the hands, the words, the message of God's love. I can't wait to see how He uses you in your world!" And they would wiggle, touch toes or push a little for more room, but each one heard their name associated with God's love and their story to tell, and they would shake their little heads in affirmation when I would ask, "Isn't it exciting to see how normal fisherman did miracles and helped people--just like you will do!"

Jesus's words were sending ones, purpose-driven and fitting for warriors:

""Behold, I send you out as sheep in the midst of wolves; so be shrewd as serpents and innocent as doves." John 17:15

"I do not ask that you take them, (my disciples)  out of the world, but that you keep them from the evil one." John 17: 15

"Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, 20 teaching them to observe all that I commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” Matthew 28:19-20

13 “You are the salt of the earth; but if the salt has become tasteless, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled under foot by men.

14 “You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden; 15 nor does anyone light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on the lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. 16 Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven." Matthew 5:13-16

"When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. Then he said to his disciples, “The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field.” Matthew 9: 36-37

Will we pray for him to send our children, us, into the harvest field? Are we willing to go anywhere? Do anything? Are we arming our children with values for living for eternity and not just living for the temporal, this world, the material, that is corrupting as we live each day?

All children and all adults were made for a life of meaning and purpose. We were created to be message makers, healers, redeemers. There is a kingdom of darkness but we are people of the light and the light will overcome all that is evil, dark, meaningless and harsh. We are people of the kingdom and we are bringing that kingdom to bear every day in every act, every expression of our faith, every moment of our worship--because we have been adopted by the king!

If we find ourselves caught in mundane, boring, life-draining darkness, perhaps we have not been living in light of the kingdom purposes for which we are designed. You are not a mere human being caught in the despair of life---you are royalty, a child of the king, called to a purpose of bringing light to dark places, bringing love to the lonely and bitter of heart, of bringing forgiveness to those who feel condemned. You are announcers of a life beyond where the rule of Christ, our loving God, will rule forever and ever.

Often, people ask me, "How did your children stay strong in their faith in very worldly and  in challenging places? (New York City, Hollywood, Oxford, Cambridge, Boston) Of course, I must tell you, the basis of their strength is God and I was on my knees every day, praying, teaching about Him and cultivating to the best of my ability, a life of faith.

But truly, I think the secret was that their hearts were captivated by a vision--"Jesus has a work for you to do in this world! You are very unique and special, because you have a story to live--just like Daniel, David, Moses, Joshua, Esther, Ruth, Mary, Hannah, Abigail were all heroes in their generation, so you were made by God to be a hero in your generation.Only you can live a story worth telling, but I am so very honored to be your mom and to coach you and train you for the great story I know you will live. I am so proud of you! I love you so much!"

How will God use you, Sarah, to shape messages? Joel, to craft music for His glory, Nathan, to write movie scripts that will show greater stories, Joy to become a teacher and discipler of young women---I know that you will be bearers of light and God will use you in your lifetime as a part of the kingdom rule He is bringing on the earth.

When you capture the fire of your own significance in the kingdom of God, when you know that as a mother, you have the ability to shape generations to become powerful leaders for the cause of Christ, then that vision will fuel the energy of your life to serve Him every day, whispering the secrets of the kingdom of God. Your fire will be passed on to those who will carry on the torch of faith.

But first you must kindle the fire in your own heart so that you will pass on the fire to your children. And it is best seen in community--the family that laughs, lives, shares, invests lives and hearts around the same purpose and celebration of life, grow from mutual community and vision.

You will never be perfect and your house will never stay totally clean and there will always be more dishes, fusses, messes--but if today, you are igniting the vision, filling the heart, passing on purpose, then today, a work is being accomplished that will be your lasting glory---that you were a builder of the kingdom of God in your lifetime and you armed warriors for His cause to take over the world for His glory with His messages.

We are not called to send our children into their lives just to be moral, good people. We are to be senders of leaders who have "caught" the kingdom messages that will transform the world!

Your unnoticed, obscure home today has a capacity to be a place of revolution and redemption when the Rabbi, Jesus, takes His proper place and whispers the secrets of the kingdom through you, His ambassador, all the moments of your day. The vibrant life of your little community will capture a vision and they will become, in the footsteps of those so long ago, the ones who are light bearers in their world who will tell the story of their King.

It is in casting a vision that a heart is captured for the life-changing messages of the kingdom of God.

I host women in my home for leadership intensives, Bible studies and discussions but so many will never be able to come. So, Monday night, I am bringing my home to you! Please pass on this information to your friends and networks and we shall have a life-changing time together!

JOIN ME MONDAY NIGHT, NOVEMBER 4, FOR A TIME OF MENTORING AND DISCIPLESHIP ON GOOGLE HANGOUTS WHERE I WILL BE SHARING MORE ABOUT THIS MESSAGE and the reason for my writing of 10 Gifts.  

Sign UP FOR A FREE HOUR OF SPEAKING AND DISCUSSION ABOUT BECOMING A MOM WHO BUILDS A LASTING LEGACY.

SIGN UP HERE AND YOU WILL RECEIVE AN EMAIL IN YOUR INBOX WITH THE INFORMATION OF HOW TO JOIN IN THE Google Hangout.

So excited--we shall change the world together! A mama's movement!

Waiting Long Enough to live a Big story takes Patience & Lots of Time: Mentoring Monday

The legendary living old tree at our "ranch," in the middle of Texas.

Gnarly branches twist and turn all around the trunk of our mysterious ancient tree, that whispered to us of  old untold stories hidden. it held the mystique of the generations it had witnessed, but hid from our sight.  Surely, as it stood in a cattle tank and was well watered, it knew the lives of those living in the 75 year old farm house just standing amongst relative trees in the near distance. Standing in the hidden brush of some property our family owns right in the middle of Texas, it was a hiking point on our evening walks. Most of the trees on our 200 acres are small scrub oak--yet this is the grand daddy of all the trees! When the kids and Clay and I first discovered it for ourselves, we could not believe how amazingly large it is. With our whole family holding hands around the tree, we could not even totally enclose the circumference. It is much larger even than it looks in this picture that my brother-in-law, Wiley Clarkson, took!

The stories this tree could tell if it could talk! It has grown and given shade to many people through the years, but it is thought to have lasted generations. Yet, this gigantic tree, started out as a little spring of a tree, but with all the potential of becoming large, old and grand at its inception. But it took a very, very long time. This tree grew through storms, draught, tornadoes and lightening. The tree has a story to tell now, since it has lasted longer than all of the other trees that are long gone. But to tell this grand story, it had to be patient to live well and strong through all the decades.

At 60, as I have been reflecting on my life, in order, hopefully, to make the next 60 intentional. However, I have been quite blessed to look back on my life and see that God has taken all of the years and made them fruitful and productive. Most days, I could not see the growth, even months, I could not see the growth. Yet, over the years, God was building a legacy through our family, our children, our ministry and our writing and speaking--but each day was lived and invested one day at a time, waiting, hoping, that our faithfulness mattered.

There were seemingly desolate times of illness, loneliness, financial issues, emotional hurts and separation from other "Christians" that broke our heart. And yet, God kept saying, daily in our quiet times,

"Wait for the LORD; Be strong and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the LORD." Psalm 27: 14

Rare, if any,  is the verse that says, "Give up now--this is the time." or "Don't be patient with those immature, irrational people in your life--you deserve to quit since life is hard!"

Quite the contrary--wait, hope, work, be steadfast, cultivate faithfulness--wait and you will see God.

God, through allowing us to wait, is building faith, leadership, spiritual muscle, maturity, messages, and a platform that will become the messages the Spirit wants to teach us so we can be a blessing with others.

Patience is learned moment by moment in irritating circumstances. It is learned through seasons--(terrible twos, tricky teens, hormonal middle age, old age senility). Teaching your child little by little to be patient, to control His spirit, to exercise self-control, is training your child to learn to wait on God.

Contemporary culture gives us permission to compromise at every point--marriage, commitments, ideals, friendship--we want instant gratification--we are the generation of "I want it now."

Yet, God's will is to build the character of Christ in us and His way is to teach us to wait--to rule over our emotions and to be still and know that "He is God."

Patience leads to all sorts of strength--spiritual, mental, physical, skill acquisition, (musical accomplishment, athletic strength, academic prowess, financial security) so many blessings come through learning to be patient.

In the end, the man of medium skill and talent who perseveres is of much greater long term value than the talented, skillful person who quits and gives up.

So as we approach this important way, we must look for all sorts of ways to underline the importance of patience, ruling over our emotions, waiting on God patiently, practicing patience with those who push our buttons. Valuing patience is valuing spiritual maturity.

And so, as you instruct your children in this important virtue, be patient as it takes them time to learn this character strength! :)

Memory Verse: "He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who captures a city." Proverbs 16:32

WE CHOOSE TO BE PATIENT, EVEN WHEN WE FEEL LIKE GETTING OUR OWN WAY. WAY #19

What an amazing verse--a slow to anger person, one who controls his spirit, is better, stronger, more rare than a person able to capture a whole city--in other words, he who is patient, will win the day.

In what areas do you find it most difficult to be patient?

I am not naturally patient. I wasted many precious seasons of my life wishing them away, someone thinking the next season would be easier. God taught me slowly. Now, I seek more to pace myself and to see each miracle each day. It is still not easy as I am a "fast-paced" person, but I just wish I had not wasted so much time trying to hurry things that needed time to grow, and just enjoyed the process more.

God is with you, God is building you and your children and your vision, God will be faithful when you wait on Him.

Sometimes you can't know you are lonely until you are loved...Plus a book you will love!

by Sarah, my daughter---for all of those who exist, lonely......

Sometimes, you can’t know you’re lonely until you are loved.

The heart is a thrifty housewife. In her hand a scrap of fellowship becomes a meal. Her grit keeps the spirit in life with the bones of a smile and the salt of occasional kindness. When her own house is bare, she gathers beauty from the fields for bread. When winter comes, she brews a little hope from sunlight and sets it in the soul’s hand like wine. She may not even know her strength is gone until another heart enters her home and sets a feast, a real feast, before her. And when that happens, she may be too stunned, and starving, to eat it.

At least at first.

I am used to doing life alone. Don’t mistake me, I have my precious family. I have priceless friends, scattered though they are throughout the country. In swift, bright bursts of time, I have known fellowship and I am grateful for every bit of generous love I have ever received. But for most of my adult and daily life, I have hammered out my local days, grappled with writing, worshipped, and hoped toward a certain set of ideals, alone. I have known rejection, yes, but for the most part the loneliness has simply been that of striving after a life that doesn’t  set me in the usual places for friendship. What I want and reach for with my minutes and hours takes me down an unfrequented road. My loneliness is my own doing and I get that. I chose it. I am used to explaining my life and not necessarily being understood. My dad, wise, beloved man that he is, once asked me if I knew that a certain idealistic decision would set me in a place of loneliness and could I live with that? I said yes, absolutely, yes. Because I’m with Rich Mullins. “It’s okay to be lonely as long as you’re free.”

The danger of that freedom is that it can become a forgetting. When you choose loneliness and try to love it you can forget that community, or worse, communion is possible. You can forget even to reach for it. I just looked up the word communion: “the sharing or exchange of intimate thoughts and feelings, especially when the exchange is on a mental or spiritual level.” I have just never known quite how to find communion where I live. I’m an introvert, I travel a lot, I hold extreme ideals – all good reasons why communion is hard to create. Life is, also, just lonely at times. I hate to feel weak, so I have met that lack with an uplifted chin. “I’m fine. I’ll read another book. I’ll take another walk.” I’ve done this for years. And though I have survived, a certain chill crept into my being. I found that I hoped less for friendship. I found that I began to suspect that who I was was just too much, to odd, for understanding. My heart spun life from scraps. And as the voices of others faded from my life, I found that my own voice rose to an uncomfortable pitch in my head.

Ever notice that the voice in your head isn’t generally an encouraging one?

When I stepped in the doors of Hutchmoot a few days back, my  inner voice, left for long months to its own devices, was especially loud. I’ve been part of the Rabbit Room community for several years and have always met a genuine love that set me in life whenever I came to Hutchmoot. But the last year has been particularly lonely. I made yet another decision that was right, but goodness, it was hard. And though I knew that I would find acceptance at Hutchmoot, I entered in a defensive, quiet stance. I didn’t expect special attention. As I walked in the door, my mind kept up its Eeyore-like narrative. Don’t expect too much. Just do what you can. Make it through. And then my inner voice was interrupted.

“You’re here!”

And my self-conscious stance was broken by warm arms around me and hands that pulled me in the doors. Within minutes, I found myself talking so quickly that the Eeyore in my head wasn’t fast enough to to break in. At every corner I turned on my way in, a face I knew from the year before met me and there was such brightness looking out at me from each set of eyes I felt almost dazzled. “How are you?” the questions always began. And when I gave the usual polite little answer, I found that the questioner waited. Stayed. “How are you truly?” I found myself telling the truth.  For the rest of this blog, go here!

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My sweet friend, Courtney Joseph with me at a conference! What a heart for God!

What adjectives would you use to define your life? If my journal could give voice, it would tell the story of my life. My friend, who comes with me everywhere, helps me to figure out my life. Often, since I was a young married woman, about every 6 months, I access my life. How am I doing overall? What is a drain? Can I do anything about it? How am I doing in marriage? Motherhood? Spiritually? Emotionally? Ministry? Home?

Life is so busy and confusing, that if I don't constantly take account of the drainers, distractors, fillers, and details, I can spin out of control.

That is why I so appreciate reading books that help me evaluate my life in light of God's best for me, so that I can invest my life--not just exist through the days.

I met Courtney Joseph a few years ago at a blogging conference. Immediately I could see that she was very intentional about her walk with God. Just this month, she put some of her thoughts into a book that does just what I said--helps women evaluate how they are growing and living their lives. I wanted to share this with you today, too, because it is a great way to review some poignant thoughts and then to evaluate where you are investing your life and how to live your life well! She told me she is happy to give one of her books to you! Just leave a comment below if you would like to enter to win one of her books!

You can purchase this book at Barnes and Noble, here.

or at

Amazon, here!