Loving Like Jesus Did

"In the twilight of our lives, we will be judged on how we have loved."St. John of the Cross

Trying to love people the way Jesus did can be intimidating. It can push us well beyond our comfort boundaries. Yet as we make this effort our children will learn what real love—and real ministry—is all about. The flame of inspiration may well be lit as our children observe our love in action—and begin to see the results in people's lives.

On Tea Time Tuesday today, I speak of 5 ways to practice love in our relationships near and far.

When our family first moved to the Colorado Springs area, we discovered a wonderful little restaurant that served a "proper" British tea, complete with scones and clotted cream. Since "teatime" is one of my favorite experiences, I frequented the little cafe often with my children in tow. Over a period of time, we befriended one of the waitresses who became dear to us. Each time we visited, we learned more about her life. And each time we returned home, the kids would have new excitement about praying for her.

"Mom, maybe we can have her to our house for tea and have a chance to be her friend and help her know the Lord."

The Lord did open up an opportunity for us to share a couple of our books with her, to talk about the Lord, and to become even closer to her before we moved away. And when we drove through the area recently on a trip, we stopped by the restaurant for a surprise visit. Our waitress friend threw up her arms in surprise when she spotted us coming in the door, and she treated all of us to lunch. Tears filled our eyes as she told us how much we had meant to her. I feel quite sure we will talk about our friend and pray for her for years to come.

So often in the context of our family routines the Lord has given us opportunities to reach out to others. It might be a checkout clerk at the store, a lonely neighbor, a nurse at the doctor's office, or a pesky neighbor child who hangs out at our house every day while his mother is at work.

Wherever the Holy Spirit places us is exactly where he can extend this special love through us. As we are faithful to take these opportunities to minister, our children will gradually get the idea that God wants to use them, one person at a time, to change the world by reaching out to people who need his love.

Romans 5:8 tells us that "God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us." It wasn't while we were praying for him to come or while we were being godly but while we were deeply involved in our particular brand of selfishness and sin that Christ saw our need, reached out toward us by coming to earth, and gave himself up to death for our benefit.

When we seek to inspire our children, we need to model for them this initiating principle. That means we put out our spiritual antennas, so to speak, wherever we go, looking for people in need. Then we take steps to reach out to them in some way, whether or not they are people we would normally feel comfortable with or people we think are good "prospects" for accepting Jesus. Even as Jesus died for us when we needed it, following him means befriending others who, like us, are in need of his grace. Then, once a relationship is formed or a friendship is started, we seek opportunities to share the truth of God's love and forgiveness as gently and attractively as we are able.

"Day by day continuing with one mind in the temple, and breaking bread from house to house, they were taking their meals together with gladness and sincerity of heart ... " ~Acts 2:47

Can you think of someone who might be in need of your hospitality today?  Invite someone for a meal or coffee, and love the way Jesus loved.

Why Education Should be Happening in Every Home & A Giveaway

Sarah's book embodies many of the ideals I held when I was homeschooling. A wonderful book!

"Sally, would you please, please start speaking and writing on Home Schooling, again???"

This was the most often received request at our Mom Heart conferences this year. Because I love all mamas and love just encouraging them in their roles, I have, perhaps, neglected writing articles on home schooling. But, if you have been in my home or have read some of my books, you know that I think all mamas are educators and trainers.

Each of us, no matter what school choice we make for our children, should be doing some educating of our children from our homes. Discussing important ideas, reading stories, teaching scripture, building character, are all areas moms should be practicing every day. 

Learn to inspire yourself.

Wise women learn from wise women. I have a sweet friend who is a kindred spirit--and she is wise. Sarah Mackenzie is gifted at communicating how to live through the whirlwinds of life and still be able to deeply impact your children. Her book brings heartfelt inspiration while granting freedom to live in peace every day, through all the circumstances of life.

We should all be reading great books to inspire ourselves in the direction of our ideals to fan the flames of our ideals. Teaching From Rest by Sarah Mackenzie is such a book.

  I loved, loved homeschooling my children and love who they have become. I home-schooled all of them from birth till they graduated from high school and pursued their own careers and school. By God's grace, they all love us, love God and have found affirmation and favor in their careers or educational pursuits, so I suppose I can now speak with some authority about how we did it in our home.

There is a way to homeschool that cooperates with the way God designed a home to be--and it will prepare them to flourish in life and give strength to your children. (A lot of the principles of helping adults and children to flourish are in The Life Giving Home book.)

This year, Sarah, my daughter, will be finishing her degree in theology at Oxford. Joy is getting her Masters at St. Andrews in Scotland, after being accepted to a Master's program at Yale,  Joel is completing his Masters in Cambridge, England at a wonderful Choral Music and conducting program. After having produced his first movie, Confessions of a Prodigal Son, and having it in Netflix and selling in many places, Nathan has been writing a book with me and working on a new movie.

Because all four of my adult children are thriving in their own fields of interest, and have been able to flourish in academic settings, many women ask me all the time, "How did you do it? What curriculum did you use?"

I was not a perfect mom and rarely in one year accomplished my educational goals with my children. But almost every day, we had devotions and read-alouds--sometimes at night, sometimes in the morning, sometimes at tea times, but I kept baskets of books everywhere--in every room, in the bathrooms, in their bedrooms. And each year on birthdays and Christmas and other holidays, they all received books as gifts and I helped each of them build their own libraries.

Yet, even as you plant seeds in a garden, protect the plants, fertilize them, water them-you should expect them to grow healthy and strong, so should all children grow healthy and mentally strong if the right seeds are planted, watered and cared for. 

I understood early that education, the acquisition of words and messages, faith and the ability to think provided a power and authority to people so as to give them an advantage in every field of study, every profession of life. And so, I focused on these as priorities--faith and reading and discussion.

We begin to understand the value of communication and messages by looking at scripture and even by looking at the one word definition God chose to use about Christ's name.

"In the beginning was the Word (Jesus's name--the word) and the Word was with God and the Word was God." John 1

If God's name was "word" then words and foundations of words are so very important.

So, if you do one thing right, read, read, read to your children. It is what was the foundation of the minds of all of my children.

There is so much pressure today, (as always), to conform to cultural norms--and to try to keep up with the Joneses and all the blogs and articles that everyone else writes about what kind of curriculum to use, when to put pressure on your 5 year old to become academic, what you have to complete in the teen years. But I did not follow or listen to the voices of culture. Even as I made a step of faith to educate my children full time at home, so I made a step of faith that we would follow life as God gave Clay and me our own ideals--not as the school system, or any other "authorities" told us to do. We were quite free to follow our own inclinations from reading and researching about what we thought would best build our children within the time limits of our own lives.

But really, really, really--the key to giving your children mental muscle power and an advantage in any kind of education, is to read out-loud to that child. All research complies with this, all teachers and writers say this, Clay and I say it emphatically in our own book. Read first--read daily---turn off media and put away work books and before you do anything else, read out-loud to them--and read out-loud to them until they are 30! Do not think that just because they can read at 6 that you should make them read to themselves and stop reading out-loud. Read to them because you get to share in mentoring, discussing ideas, your vocabulary is bigger and you can explain things and they develop better skills in thinking and writing and communicating when you read out-loud.

Here is another quotation that explains the culturally rich soul and the impoverished souls because of literacy and reading. Hope you enjoy these articles.

The poor and the affluent are not communicating because they do not have the same words. When we talk of the millions who are culturally deprived, we refer not to those who do not have access to good libraries and bookstores, or to museums and centers for the performing arts, but those deprived of the words with which everything else is built, the words that open doors.

Children without words are licked before they start. The legion of the young wordless in urban and rural slums, eight to ten years old, do not know the meaning of hundreds of words which most middle-class people assume to be familiar to much younger children.

Most of them have never seen their parents read a book or a magazine, or heard words used in other than rudimentary ways related to physical needs and functions. Thus is cultural fallout caused, the vicious circle of ignorance and poverty reinforced and perpetuated.

Children deprived of words become school dropouts; dropouts deprived of hope behave delinquently. Amateur censors blame delinquency on reading immoral books and magazines, when in fact, the inability to read anything is the basic trouble.” 

Peter Jennison

My sweet friend, Sarah Mackenzie, has written this great book, which embodies so many of the ideals I carried through my years of home education. Celebrating life with your children within the limitations of your own life puzzle. Reading great books. Giving a vibrant faith lived within the moments of life. You will love this book.

Giving Away 3 Books!

Sarah has generously offered to give away 3 books to my readers. Please leave a comment below and either tell us about yourself, your questions or why you would like to win the book. And if you already have it, we are happy to send one to the friend of your choice. Be inspired today!

But it HERE

Freedom To Breathe Starts with the Knowledge That You Are Forgiven

“Mama, do you still love me when I make such stupid mistakes?” My sweet teenager, many years ago, was curled up on the couch in an almost fetal position, deeply regretting something she has done and condemning herself over and over again for not refraining from the foolish behavior.

“I love you if you had made 10,000 mistakes. I love you because you are mine. I love you even in spite of  the mistakes you will make the rest of your life. You are so precious to me, I can hardly refrain from kissing your sweet head a million times right now.”

A tiny smile curled her lips. I stroked her hair and told her that God’s love became more precious to me each day, because the older I got, the more I sinned, even when I wish I could be good.  And this truth made me love Him for His gracious love given freely every single day.

The truth is, all of us know that deep inside we are broken. We want to be good, to practice patience, to be generous of heart, yet, our petty selves accuse us of countless ways we fail to live up to our own standards on a daily basis. And we know we fall short in a thousand ways of God’s ways for us. But now that I am 63, I have learned that His love for me is beyond measure, His forgiveness already extends to every day of my life. His mercy is never ending. This truth has changed my life. No matter what I do in a day, he still loves me, forgives me, wants to be in relationship with me.

Just this morning, I was awakened by a sunrise outside the bedroom window. Pink and coral shadows danced on the clouds and seemed to say, “This day id holy, a day to celebrate, because I am here. My love and mercy are the starting points of your day. Remember me and live in my joy.”

 And then I remembered one of my favorite verses that speaks to me every time I see a beautiful sunrise.,

 The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;[a]
    his mercies never come to an end;
 they are new every morning;
    great is your faithfulness.

Lamentations 3:22-23

The Steadfast love of the Lord never ceases, His mercies never come to an end, they are new every morning. Every single morning when we awaken, God’s mercy sees our frailty and provides for a covering of grace through every moment we fall short of perfection. Every day, we can live in the freedom to know we are forgiven.

This profound truth is so vitally important to being able to love God fully, and to live in the deep joy and freedom He wants us to experience every day.

The truths of His forgiveness written in this book will transform your life every day. His life exchanged for your life means you will never have to feel separated from Him again, but every day, you can curl up in His abiding love, walk in His gracious mercy and breathe free from the burden of guilt.  Our heavenly Father waits to show you His goodness because it is at the very core of His heart.

It is my hope and prayer that everyone who studies these profound truths will understand and experience His complete forgiveness of every sin you will ever commit, every flaw, every imperfection and that you will live in the peace His spirit brings to carry us through every day until we see Him face to face.

I’m so excited to announce that Angela and her Love God Greatly team have recently released another book…this one called You Are Forgiven. If you enjoyed, You Are Loved (which Angela and I co-authored together), then I know you will enjoy, You Are Forgiven! This weekend I’m happy to announce that I’m giving away 10 copies of Love God Greatly’s newest book: You Are Forgiven.

We all need to read this book because in a broken world everyone needs to know that there is love and forgiveness to be found in Christ for every single person: for you, for your offenders, for your spouse, for your children and friends..

 Enter this giveaway today and make sure to share it with your friends! The You Are Forgiven Giveaway begins now and ends Sunday morning.

 Ways to enter the giveaway:

1.    Share about it on Facebook or Instagram and add your name in the comment section.

2.    Share one of the many images for You Are Forgiven, tag LoveGodGreatly so they can see it.

3.    Comment on this post why you struggle with forgiveness.

Buy it HERE

 Don’t forget, Love God Greatly’s next Bible study begins on August 29th so grab some friends and join them at LoveGodGreatly.com!

Building the Last Homely House & Podcast

Building the legacy of Home, marriage, a godly legacy requires Owning Your Stewardship of those god-designed roles.

Helen Allingham

“Frodo was now safe in the Last Homely House east of the Sea. That house was, as Bilbo had long ago reported, ‘a perfect house, whether you like food or sleep, or story-telling or singing, or just sitting and thinking best, or a pleasant mixture of them all.’ Merely to be there was a cure for weariness, fear and sadness.” 

The Fellowship of the Ring by J.R.R. Tolkien

As a lover of great literature, Rivendell, in Lord of the Rings, captivated my attention and Sarah's and Joy's attention. Picturing our home as a place that remembers all the great life from eras gone by and that captures its beauty, has been one of our goals, that has given us hours and years of collecting and crafting and nurturing over the years.

Kristen is thinking about building Home this week because she moved to Portland yesterday and is pondering how to shape a new part of her story for her family in a new place. As you read this, I will be flying with my family to Oxford, via London, with thoughts of helping Sarah put together her new home as she marries and begins a new part of her history. Kristen and I both cherish the same sorts of ideas for building a place that holds a legacy of faith, a marriage that holds fast through all the years and all the seasons, or a single mom who creates Life through her own planning and creativity, a holding place for the reality of Christ to be lived through all the moments. We all know this requires planning and a conductor of such a life. It is the theme of my newest book, released last year with Sarah, The Life Giving Home

Buy the book and the Planner to give yourself fresh ideas. HERE

Building a Home Requires Imagining it as a Place of Resource for Life:

A library that holds all the great books of children's literature and classics and great thinkers, biographies and writers is a must. And now, due to Clay's kindness to move his office to the basement, I have our library as a tea room of sorts. With comfy chairs, a tea set, art and paintings from my background all over the walls, with candle light and music--it is a lovely getaway where I can share heart-to-heart with all in my wake.

A well-stocked kitchen with all sorts of home-made recipes crafted over years of testing, with all the holiday food; food for those who are ill; birthday fare; winter-cold-night soups and breads and all sorts of healthy variety in between.

Fireplaces where stories are told and ideas discussed and children are cuddled.

bedrooms with comfy chairs and piles of books in baskets to encourage reading and quiet times and of course candles galore.

Piano, guitars, drums, flute, dulcimer--all collected over the years--some more used than others, but all for practicing producing music of all sorts.

Games and book baskets and art books and cd's and Pandora and dvd's from all imaginings to instruct, inspire, soothe, comfort and to stoke the imagination.

Clusters of chairs, grouped together to encourage great and close conversations--rockers on the front porch; setees and big chairs on the back deck; gatherings of chairs in 2's all over the house to make a close meeting and discipleship time for all who are there.

And of course a bookshelf in every room, with each child collecting his own library.

A suitable place for traditions celebrated and momentous occasions retold and the Bible read, over and over and over again--to remember Him and stories of faith and heroes and courage and holiness.

This is what I have had in my heart to shape--a home that breathes life and truth and love into all who would enter--

To make sure my home, for my family and friends, is indeed the last homely house and that all that has been excellent and worthwhile over the ages is celebrated in its walls--

because everyone needs a place to belong and a home where welcome is always fresh with all who cross the doorway.

We hope you will enjoy our podcast today. 

Kristen and I will be taking a break from our podcast for a few weeks as I spend 3 weeks away in the UK with our sweet children and as Clay and I celebrate our 35th anniversary! Kristen is settling in and she will be giving birth to her precious baby boy. We have some great plans for a new series for our podcasts coming this fall. 

And please save dates on your calendars and plan to join me at a whole new kind of conferences that I will be hosting this year. We plan to come to Denver, Colorado; Orange County, California; Dallas, Texas; Raleigh, North Carolina; and Portland. The conferences will be late January--early March. I hope many of you will be able to join me. 

It will be grand. 

Blessings and blessings in your days ahead. 

Don't Forget to Encourage One Another!

"Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful; and let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds, not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another and all the more as you see the day drawing near." Hebrews 10: 23-25

One morning, in our small group Bible study, a sweet mom came in feeling so overwhelmed with her children that when we showed just a little tiny bit of interest and sympathy for her, she burst out sobbing.  Choking the words out, she told us what an awful mother she was. We all shook our heads knowing this wasn't true--and as the story spilled out, we found she hasn't gotten any sleep for several days as she has a small baby, plus three other children under seven. No wonder she was falling apart! She is tired and weary. She has had no help or relief in the past weeks, and just needed some love and prayer. I was so very happy she came to our group that day, because the Lord was just waiting to encourage her through lots of others. What if she had not come? She would not have felt the fellowship of the Lord, His love, His words of encouragement, or His direction--because the sweet mom would have been alone and as a person alone, we become especially vulnerable targets for Satan's arrows of defeat and discouragement.

I remember once when we had just moved to a new city and I was feeling quite alone,  a lady at the check out stand of a grocery store very kindly and unexpectedly asked how I was doing. She said, "You look like you just need to know someone cares." Well, I didn't even know that I was close to tears, but her kindness brought them to my eyes immediately. She gave me a hug, I gathered my many bags and headed to the car.  That kind woman became an angel to me, as it was such a blessing just to know that someone in the world cared!

We all need sympathy, love, help, and encouraging words. We all feel inadequate at times, and just knowing we are not alone is so important. I have also realized lately that all of us moms who are believers have the Holy Spirit working in us, and He drives us to want to be involved in ministry.  What we can tend to forget is that the ministry of being God's voice, words, hands, touch, and help to those who are in our personal lives could be the ministry He wants to use us in today!  Some moms are great at meals, some are practical, some are encouragers. But all of us who decide to initiate life-giving to those around us--including our children--can be the difference between them being faithful and having hope, or instead giving up or giving in to despair. I see this especially in young twenty-somethings; when they feel alone, they are most tempted to give up their hope and foundations.

Perhaps its the common trait of not getting enough sleep that makes this also true of young moms! That is why I am so committed to starting small groups all over the world, to give grace and strength to those who are called to ideals. It is in praying for one another and loving one another that we will build community and love and friendship.

Think for a moment about who you know, who might be especially in need of encouragement today, and consider how you might offer that encouragment.  (Hint: it may be someone or several someones in your own home!)

Passing On a Vision for Life to Our Children

Now, best friends, kindred spirits, confidants and mentors to each other....forever!

As thoughts of my sweet daughter's wedding are dancing through my many thoughts and as I prepare to travel to Oxford, in my mind, this memory is especially poignant.  Much of Sarah's life, she dreamed of the husband God would bring, the home where she would shape souls of friends and children alike, the ways she would embody God through all the moments of her life in her own arena. And now, these years later, as Sarah waited for her prayers to be answered, she will enter into the dream and prayers she has prayed for so long.

Recently, when my sweet Sarah was home, we sat together again, on our porch, sipping tea. Mother and daughter, and talked of home, children, marriage and building a legacy out of her life. How sweet the time, how short! 

Take note, young mamas ... the time passes much more quickly than you might ever imagine, but right now you are shaping the God sized dreams your children will need to store in their heart, to build a godly home and to shape generations to come. This memory was when Sarah was just beginning to grow into young womanhood..

Sarah sits cross-legged across from me on our king-sized bed, sipping a cup of hot tea, obviously savoring the adultness of the moment. Tonight, we'll read a chapter from Beautiful Girlhood, a lovely book by Mabel Hale from 1922. We only read a few chapters because we always created books as a diving board from which to explore other subjects and I even found other books to read with her through the years. We'll talk about it, turning topics that might seem mundane to other girls today into matters of serious discussion. Chapters on propriety, purity, beauty, marriage, building a family and a godly legacy and femininity. All are starting points that take us down various trails of mother-daughter heart to hearts. 

On other nights like this one we might study the Bible together, share secrets with a whisper, or just giggle a lot. It's our Monday night "girl talk," a special time when we meet privately in my bedroom, just Sarah and me. Although it is supposed to be mostly for Sarah, I sometimes can't help but wonder if the greater impact is on me. As I try to distill, in just a few words, a lifetime of reflection and experience, the Spirit of God reminds me of my responsibility to redeem the time with my children, to make the most of every opportunity (see Ephesians 5:15-17). I think it was taking time alone that built us into such close friends.

As I look at my precious thirteen-year-old firstborn, her spirit and body showing the first blush of womanhood, I realize there won't be enough Monday nights to tell her all I want her to know. These days will pass all too quickly in the torrent of time that sweeps away the weeks, months, and years in a rush of living. When we pull away from the current onto our little Monday night island, though, I catch sight of the changes that I have missed in the rush. I see her slowly shedding the cloak of childhood, tentatively trying on the mantle of young adulthood.  All too soon, we'll sit on this bed and talk, not just as mother and daughter, but as two grown women.

I know I'll never be completely ready for that time, but I pray with all my heart that Sarah will be. I look at the world I am preparing her to enter, and I shudder at the distortions and perversions of true femininity that will vie for my little girl's heart, mind, and soul.

And following close on Sarah's heels are two boys who want to become men. Clay will shape their ideas and ideals of masculinity, but God has given me as their mother tremendous influence over their lives. How I handle their transitions to manhood, and the lifelong connections of mother and son, will have a profound influence on the shape and direction their lives take. And then, when most other mothers I know will be facing the "empty nest," sweet little Joy will be entering young womanhood, just as her older sister Sarah is now. And I'll do it all over once again.

So I find myself praying more than normal after my Monday nights with Sarah. And later I did with Joy, The words of the proverb ring in my heart:

"The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down." ~Proverbs 14:1

They set my heart to questioning my own efforts to build the house God has given me. What am I doing? Is it enough? Am I building my house or, God forbid, tearing it down? Is the foundation strong? Will the house stand? Do I know what to do with the few short years God puts these children under my care and influence? Will I be the wise woman? In Sarah's case, will she accept the mantle of biblical womanhood as she becomes a woman, wife, and mother? Will she imitate my life? Will she pick up where I leave off?

And now, today, after years of mother-daughter talks, many seasons of wondering how it would all turn out, seeking to hold fast to dreams and ideals, Sarah is engaging in all the ideals we ever talked about together through those many nights.

Now, we are best friends forever.

Perhaps it would be good to ask these same questions of your own house.  Many blessings to you today!

All They Need Is Love: Cultivating a Culture of Love in Your Home

"Mom, if there is one place in the world where I fit, it is in our family--wherever we are, whatever we are doing. It's not about the place, it is about belonging to each other, "getting" each other, accepting each other, and celebrating life together. That is what I most miss about being at home."

~an unnamed child in our home :)

As I pack Joy's bags with her and ready Joel to move to Oxford, we have been having long, lingering talks on the front porch after our evening walks.  

"What has meant the most to you about home and what made you feel loved?"

These are some of the things we have pondered. 

Their answer, "The time you spent talking to us, like this, every night, friend time in the summer.'

*Laying with us in our beds talking at nights.

*Dinnertime every night, together, talking, shaping our souls around the same conversations."

*Listening to me when I had things I needed to talk to someone about.

There are so many ways we have discussed the past days. But I think most of all, it is the time invested over and over again, when it requires patience on our part and no one sees.

It is the service of making meals, changing diapers, getting up with a child who cannot sleep or has an ear infection, getting on the floor and playing a board game or helping a girl find the right gift for the birthday party for a friend, drying tears, staying up late with a teen past, you past exhaustion, and listening to their despair of loneliness and assuring them they will indeed find kindred spirits, . 

The way of love is not only a commitment in our hearts that says, "Of course I love you, you are my child."  But a giving of ourselves day after day, so that others might feel His love, His grace, His hands of comfort and His words.

Every child needs and longs for a place to belong, a people to be a part of, a place to feel at ease, affirmation for who they are as they are, amidst all their failures, all their flaws--

a sanctuary that gives abundant life and love and protects from all the evils that lurk outside the walls of that home.

Love should be the very air that our children breathe, the atmosphere, the foundation from which all other character is trained, from which all instruction comes.

LOVE, FIRST.

That kind of love pervading the atmosphere of life requires one who conducts it intentionally through all the moments of the days and years. And then when love fails, nurtures hearts of forgiveness, grace and freedom and picks right back up again.

So often, we want to just have life be defined by formulas to keep, rules to follow, neat patterns by which to live. Or perhaps we want to give love in one fell swoop--a present at Christmas, a card and candy at Valentines day. But that kind of love cheapens the love that Jesus modeled when he came to serve, gave up his rights and them died for us quietly, generously.

I even think many parents are suspicious about the idea of loving their children too freely. We hear the admonitions ...

"Well, you don't want to spoil them and flatter them too much!"

Jesus loved His disciples so well that they were willing to give their lives for His cause.

I am not speaking about false flattery. I am speaking of generous, committed, serving, sacrificial love--which was the basis of God's love for us.

Shouldn't it be the basis for our love for our children?

If we really studied, pondered, cherished, and applied the ways of Jesus' love as it is shown in scripture, wouldn't the way we parent--especially the way we mother-- look different?

WHY IS IT WE APPLY SCRIPTURE DIFFERENTLY TO OUR CHILDREN THAN TO ANYONE ELSE?

If we were made for love, and if love is the foundational need in the deep places of our hearts, then knowing that our children have this need, should shape how we seek to influence them.

Jesus Himself said, "They will know you by your love for one another."

Not only the world will know us as believers by our love for one another, our children, our friends, our spouses will also measure and assess in their hearts the reality of God, by how much we display His love in our home.

How does this apply to the way we parent our children or love our spouses, or serve our neighbors?

I have written out many verses from scripture on loving today. If these verses go deep into our hearts, penetrate our very being; if we ponder Jesus and understand Him, then we will understand that deep, abiding love is the culture around which our homes should be built.

It is through establishing a "love culture" in our homes that our children will be taught what God is really like.

"Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails." 

~I Corinthians 13: 4-8

"Love is a perfect bond of unity."

~Colossians 3:14

"Love covers a multitude of sins."

~I Peter 4:8

"Love your neighbor as yourself."

~Mark 12:31

"If I then, the Lord and the Teacher, washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another’s feet. 15 For I gave you an example that you also should do as I did to you."

~John 13:14-15

"If I have done this to you," (girding Himself with a towel and washing the feet of His disciples before He also died for them on the cross) "so you should also do this to one another."

HOW DO WE MODEL SERVANT LEADERSHIP TO OUR CHILDREN? HOW DO WE LOVE THAT MUCH?

It is what reached the disciples' hearts, so that they gave their lives to His cause. Is this the secret to our influence over our own children's hearts as well?

One of the teachers of the law came and heard them debating. Noticing that Jesus had given them a good answer, he asked him, “Of all the commandments, which is the most important?”

" 'The most important one,' answered Jesus, 'is this: "Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength." The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.'"

~Mark 12:30-31

Perhaps we are to love our children as much as we love ourselves; to lay down our lives for them. Jesus surely meant that it was the basis for relating to all people-- not just others, but our own family!

“For God so loved the world,that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.

~John 3:16

Are we willing to give up as much for our children as God gave up for us?

 " ... but God demonstrates his own love toward us in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us."

~Romans 5:8

His love covered us when we were still failing, stumbling, wallowing in our selfishness. God, as our Father, saved us while we were still in our sin. What does this imply about us being parents to our own sinful children? That we show love while they are yet sinners.

"No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord."

~Romans 8:37-39

Is there any attitude or action that can separate your child from you, from your love, or is your love generous and consistent, forgiving, long-suffering?

"I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me."

~Galatians 2:20

This is the hardest--the giving up of ourselves as He did for us.

"See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are."

~1 John 3:1

Hope you enjoy our podcast this week. We so appreciate it when you share it with your friends. Your comments and letters have meant so much to Kristen and me!

For more encouragement on Shaping a Home Culture of Love, read The Life Giving Home! Check it out on the sidebar. 

What Does It Look Like to Inspire Our Children?

Sarah was putting the last artistic touches on a Christmas package. Always attentive to detail, she had adorned her gift with wrapping fit for a queen. Delicate snowflake tissue paper lined the shipping box in which she placed the foil-wrapped gift, making sure the curled ribbon wasn't crushed. Seven-year-old Joy sat licking a cinnamon candy stick as she watched Sarah finish her task.

"You must be sending that package to one of your best friends! It's so beautiful! I wish I would get a package like that in the mail from one of my friends!"

"No, Joy. Actually, I'm sending this to a girl I just recently met on one of my trips."

"Well, why are you taking so much time to make it so pretty, since you hardly even know her? I think you should send it to your best friend!"

Sarah sat down at the cluttered kitchen table to explain.

"The girl I'm sending this present to probably won't get any other presents from friends. She's had a lot of problems and has been rejected by a lot of people in her life. Her mom has been married to two different men, and she has been real sad and lonely moving from house to house. I thought I would try to brighten her life just a little bit by sending this. And I'm putting it in a pretty package because she needs to know she is loved even more than my best friends need to know it."

"I'm glad you're my sister, Sarah!" Joy said as she skipped away from the table, satisfied in her soul with the answer Sarah had given.

When we consider how to pass on the gift of inspiration to our children, we often think of taking them to church or getting them involved in a children's program or youth group, and those activities can be very positive. But even more important, I believe, is doing for them what Sarah was doing for Joy and what Jesus did for his disciples: helping them develop a heart for ministry by showing them what it means to reach out in love and compassion to others.

Too often, I think, we are tempted to view outreach mostly in terms of missionaries reaching unchurched people in faraway lands or perhaps an evangelistic crusade for thousands or an enthusiastic youth-group rally. But Jesus gave us a very different model of ministry when he took the time to reach out to people he encountered in the course of his every- day life. He happened to go by Simon Peter's home after a trip to the synagogue, and while there, he healed Peter's sick mother-in-law (Mark 1:29-31). He went to a friend's house and scandalized the Pharisees by drinking and eating with the people he met there—"tax collectors and sinners" (Luke 5:29-32). He commended a Roman soldier in front of a crowd of people for his great faith (Matthew 8:5-13). Wherever he walked, he encountered people in need, he had compassion on them, and he helped them.

Have you considered what it looks like to inspire your children through your own actions?

Harvesting A Godly Character: Christians, addicted to mediocrity....why?

Rembrandt, The Money Changer

Needing grace in my life! How about you? As I approach a deadline for editing, a wedding in Oxford in two weeks for my Sarah, podcasts, deadlines, getting two adult children moved overseas, packing, living in between, I find myself needing space and time that I do not have. So, I covet your prayers amidst it all and leave you with an article of my days past--that gets to the heart of Harvesting a Godly Character. 

Meanwhile, I hope you are all enjoying your summer and storing up fun and great memories for the new season coming. Hope you enjoy my podcast with Kristen--we enjoy our podcasts and engaging with all of you so much.

”Excellence is an art won by training and habituation. We do not act rightly because we have virtue or excellence, but we rather have those because we have acted rightly. We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act but a habit.” --Aristotle

Rembrandt became a master of light and  a detailed painter, exquisite faces by training, practice, and years and years of painting, over and over and over again--practice. And so it is with any craft, skill, degree or accomplishment.

However, it is also true of character and a Christian testimony--the character that is habituated to improving, developing integrity by practice, stretching to work hard, to do the best, to exceed expectations comes from daily practice and personal integrity. Those whose ideals are set high and aim, each day to pursue those ideals will have the opportunity to become excellent in any field.

This comes from an inner grid, the way one learns to see life and expects himself to live. We called this "self-government," when we trained excellence of character into the very fiber of our children's souls.

I have been surrounded by mediocrity, compromise and substandard Christians in several public arenas and personal situations lately. I have asked myself, with the image of the living God imprinted upon my very being, shouldn't I, and all true believers,  be able to call forth excellence and integrity as a reflection of Him in my life.

"As a man sows, so shall he reap." Galatians

Yet, excellence and integrity is a personal issue. One can only become this way through a personal commitment, a vision of oneself, and a decision that says,

"Regardless of what is happening around me, I will be the best I can be, work the hardest I am able, pursue the highest standards--especially for my personal life where no one but God sees--because I have been bought with a price and have His Holy Spirit residing within. So my worship of Him requires that I pursue the standard of His Holiness as an affirmation of His reality in my life."

Whether as a mother training the character of children, filling their minds with excellent writers, artists, thinkers, or as a woman being a steward of every aspect of her life, one can only become excellent by stretching, determining to obey His still small voice and then using every resource to pursue bringing His light and imprint upon this world.

This labor of excellence, personally and in the lives of our children, may/will take many long years--but if we are not committed to pursuing whatever it takes to build this excellence, then what hope does our future have--and even more, how can we represent Him, who has given all?

Paul said, "Follow me as I follow Christ." We are called to become leaders that others can follow and emulate.With every year of faith, there should be more of Him reflecting through our lives.  It is not a choice, it is a call on our lives. We cannot say, "I am a Christian, but I think I will make "c's or d's" in my character choices. We aim high because the love of Christ compels us.

More in the months ahead--but have just been pondering--why are so many believers falling so short of His best?

Not talking about being a pharisee--talking about what we should expect as royalty--children of the most high God. What do you think? Have we set our standards far too low?