"In this world you have tribulation, but take courage, I have overcome the world." Jesus, John 16:33
Recently, when I arrived home after 5 weeks of being gone, I was looking forward to peace, calm, sunny skies. But instead we had devastating winds, and 6 more inches of snow, added to the other two feet that had fallen in the last month.
The distance between my ideals, the dreams I had of shaping a wonderful home, and the reality of messes, sick children, fusses and messes often took me by surprise. Just when I thought I had sort of subdued home , a storm of life hits and sometimes it can overwhelm.
Part of the problem is that we expect to control life, to tame the surprise winds and blasts of snow or rain, we will always be disappointed because the storms just keep coming.
Right in the smack dab middle of Jesus loving, teaching, encouraging, and training his disciples, they embark on crossing the familiar lake where they have lived all their lives, and suddenly a life-threatening storm overtakes them.
What could Jesus possibly be thinking? Does He want to lose all of His disciples at once? Is He trying to discourage them? After all, they had given up their whole lives to follow Him. Their hearts were dedicated to worshiping Him. They were busy serving other people. And really, now this? Is this any way to treat those who are following you?
Sometimes the "whaps" on our lives feel like this. Personal … invasive … too much.
Have you ever felt that way? I have cooked. I have washed dishes. I have lost years of sleep. I have loved and served and given--does anyone notice? Does it matter? --and now this? Another storm? Another problem? The relentlessness of life is about to drown me, Lord. "Do you not care that we are perishing, Lord?" the disciples asked that day on the lake. This is the same question that we, too, sometimes have on our hearts.
Just when we have the ideals of our lives in place, and have defined what the kingdom of home is, when we have determined to build our homes as places where the life of Christ will flourish, storms and battles begin to overtake us, and we feel that we will soon be overcome.
If you are experiencing weariness or discouragement, it just means you are engaged in the battle. The battle and its raging are not a measure of your success or failure, but how you respond to the battle will determine its outcome.
When we determine to make our homes a place of life, Satan is determined to thwart us. He knows the most precious treasure in God's economy are His children, His handmade creations--those who have souls that will last for eternity. And so the battleground for our future is at the soul level of life.
We are living in homes where the laws of thermodynamics can be seen every day-- energy is depleting at a constant rate and everything is moving toward disorder! Know this, understanding that it will never change, and give yourself grace. Do not expect perfection. Do not condemn yourself or become angry at your children because they are not perfect.
Walk in grace. Celebrate life. Look for joy in the corners. Find a friend to pray with, to share life with, who holds your ideals and values. Know that all moms have the same issues--just different puzzles to put together.
Our children are selfish and sinful, our husbands (and even we) are fallible and imperfect; things fall apart, get broken, cost money, people are unloving, we are challenged by the culture around us, and we lack support systems to support our ideals.
In order to know how to raise godly children, we must have a refined picture of the goals we are aiming for, but the second part of being productive in this venture of motherhood is understanding the battle. All our homes are broken, our children are broken, and without the grace of God, we will not be able to make it. But I believe and have seen that with God on our side, our labor is not in vain but is part of a story of His power and goodness throughout eternity.
Feeling weary or discouraged or inadequate or guilty from failing is a normal part of the process. Remember, You are in training, just as I am. Engaging in home life, marriage, ministry and the discipleship of my children was truly the main training ground where little by little I learned what it meant to become a more mature Christian.
Give yourself grace today, friend. I know God does.