God is Out of the Box--And So Are We!

One cold, snowy winter's day, Nathan, then 14, and a budding philosopher,  was drinking a cup of hot chocolate in our kitchen. He said, "I'm so glad our God is out of the box in our home!"

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Well, a lot of people we know act like God is mad or disappointed with us when we are not perfect. I'm even afraid of some of your mama friends and I sometimes feel like I might get in trouble just for being with them."

"It feels to me like lots of people we know think that God is more concerned about a rule to be kept and behavioral standard of quietness and respect to keep--knowing all the rules and keeping them."

"I am so glad the God we believe in is the One who created chili peppers for fajitas, Celtic music to dance to, puppy dogs to be snuggled, jokes for giggling, and stars to enjoy when we sleep out on the deck. We enjoy Him and celebrate Him in our home and look for his fingertips in creation. We don't just work for him—that's what I mean."

I was so thankful that is what he perceived in our home, at least at this time,—a personal creator-God, filled with infinite ideas of ways to fill our world with things to enjoy. And a place where he could feel he belonged with all of his bigger-than-life personality.

Many Christians tend to defend fervently their theological underpinnings and argue rigorously the tenets of doctrine. Yet often I have observed that in choosing to live only in a cerebral world of "what I know intellectually about God," they miss so much of his personality and nature, which can be observed through his role as the Artist.

Please know that I am an avid student and teacher of scripture and love the foundational truths that fill my mind and soul that I also upheld through the years in our home.

Yet because we live in an isolated, somewhat cerebral time, we define our worth by what we know or what kind of a degree we have or by the work we accomplish. Our spirituality is often expressed by the theological philosophy we claim—charismatic or reformed or Baptist or Catholic. Data, facts, and knowledge as reflected by scores on academic tests are often the measure of a person's worth.

God condemned the pharisees for being men of law and no compassion for the downhearted or heart for the true God. They were more concerned about keeping law than loving God.

Why do I keep on writing articles about beauty, creation, the boundaries of God's life being bigger than we can imagine? Because I live in a world of young adults that are leaving the faith by the droves. Children who are raised on the dry bones of rules rather than on the vibrant love, beauty and goodness of a living God are not captivated in their hearts to follow God. Rules do not engage the heart or imagination of living a great story for God's glory.

God is interested in us engaging with Him through our days, in prayer, worship by serving Him in the many moments of our daily life. Our children will believe in God when they see that He influences, fills and inspires our behavior and attitudes through out all the seasons of our lives because He is real to us--both through His word and through His spirit living through our lives.

Life is fast-paced, efficient, impersonal.

We regularly shut God out of our lives to center our attention on worldly achievement or efficiency and then wonder where He has gone.

Such an overemphasis on the academic and technological determines that a relationship with God will be dryly intellectual or clever but obviously absent of feeling, awe inspiring reverence as at the beauty of a snowflake and delight in the colors and variety that also express his personality.

It would be like writing or defending a long treatise on the role of a father, his character, and the history of fatherhood—separate from relating personally and intimately with him. No "report on fatherhood" would ever satisfy our need to experience life with an actual father, the life that comes from engaging in the personality, friendship, and companionship of a real live person.

God intended that we become witnesses of his beauty, design, color, and pleasure so that we could gain a more intimate, real, and personal knowledge of him. God does not want to be just a thought to know, but a personally engaging friend and Father whose relationship with us is filled with memory, delight, and moments to be experienced and enjoyed.

Is your picture of God, his transcendence, HIs joy, His beauty, His love and affection a part of the design of your home? Your home is a workshop to reflect the many facets of the jewel of His reality. What three things can you begin to change in your home so that everyone feels they have come into contact with the Living, vibrant God when they come through the doors of your home?

Be inspired with new ideas and ways to bring His reality in your home through The Lifegiving Home.

Also, don't forget to sign up for our live webcast next Tuesday night where Nathan and I will be sharing more about our thoughts of giving all of our children, especially our out of the box ones, a place to belong and become all that they were meant to be.

Information at the link below!

Don't miss an evening, up close and personal--Your Out of the Box Child

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My Nathan is home!

Sequestered alone in Sarah's room, where for the moment, no one could find me, I began to read the chapters of the book Nathan had sent to me. We had embarked on another unique journey for us to write a book about what it was like for him, and for me, to go through our journey as a mama and boy through the years of our home with him, the out of the box boy, (clinical ocd, add, a spectrum of autism and a few other tiny issues), and me the mama who had to figure it all out.

I had never really asked him how he had felt being different than the others--a more different kind of different. But now, here were his memories all tied in a bundle of words. His heartfelt issues that followed him, made his "fitting in" harder, finding home a safe haven have all opened up memories and a new world of understanding into his heart.

I know so many of you have children who are "different" in their own ways--perhaps harder to reach, carrying some mysterious issues that you are trying to figure out, or just wanting to know how to reach the hearts of all of your children who are different from one another.

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Nathan and I are working on the final parts of the book these next two weeks, so we decided that since we were together, we would do a live webcast and share some of what we have discovered through the years of his life in our home. I hope you will join us if you need encouragement, hope, inspiration or just sympathy in your journey of motherhood. You can sign up for the webcast HERE or by putting your curser on the box below. 

We all love children who are easy to train and quick to learn, but what does it look like to love the kid who is mysterious, challenging, and outside-the-lines? How on earth do you even begin with your child who just can't quite be tamed? Tune in to this dynamic conversation between Sally Clarkson and her own "superman" son, Nathan, and gain an understanding of what it means to cherish the unique person that God has created your challenging child to be. Learn how God has particularly chosen you for the task of seeking out their gifts, understanding their different voice, and learning to see the image of God within them. Sally will give her own unique insight and practical suggestions about how to help your children grow and flourish, even those with special challenges and setbacks. Nathan will share from his own heart about his experience as a child with a different personality and a unique mind, and give you rare insight into how an outside-the-box kid might operate.

Included topics:

- What could possibly be going through my child's mind?

- Reach the heart, not the behavior

- Love them for how God has created them, not how we want them to be

- Unique Children Require Unique Paths

And much more!

Please join us for this very special conversation, and gain a deeper understanding of how to love your own "different" children! 

Great News! Our friends from Dallas have invited us to an evening up close and personal with me and my son Joel for a Life Giving Home Encounter. We would love to see you there and have an evening of meeting and talking to many of you who we communicate with every day through the blog and podcasts. Join us and bring your friends for beautiful evening together. Register HERE

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Intentionally Learning to Own Your Life

 

"Mama, I just can't wait to talk to you. After all of these years, I am seeing so many elements of my life dove-tailing into a focussed purpose and a really happy life. I can see how God was using all of the years of waiting on Him, being faithful, studying hard, living through years of faith and loneliness to prepare me for a time when I would flourish."

As I rolled over sleepily, yawning, stretching and trying to get my eyes to open, I grabbed my phone to check the time. The darkness of night was fading away into the early freshness of a Monday morning. The little "ding" had awakened me to tell me I had a text and I knew it would probably be one of my kids--either Nathan in New York or Sarah in Oxford. Both sent texts before I was out of bed on lots of mornings where it was barely 6 in the morning, my time.

As it happens, this time it was Sarah. What an amazing season this has been for her. Working 20 hours a week while studying in Oxford was a rhythm she had to practice and grow into, as the labor for her job and for her many thousands of pages she had to read and the papers she had to write were an uphill challenge. Falling in love with a kindred spirit, wonderful man, who had also been practicing faithfulness his whole life was now culminating into a "blessed by all" engagement. Sarah was beginning to become recognized in areas of writing, thinking and ideas by her professors and leaders in Oxford that she had been working on for years. This had given her one of the most productive years of her young adulthood.

At almost 33, she was seeing the many years of prayers coming together to answer beyond what she ever imagined. But without the years of practicing faithfulness, waiting on God, studying and writing books, learning to live a life thad had seasons of perseverance and  loneliness, she would never be suited to the challenging life God has taken her to in Oxford. Her period of waiting on God and enduring through many difficult years with very little promise of what would come, caused her to seek God over and over again. It required faith in what she hoped for, conviction of things not seen. She had dreamed of studying in Oxford for years, but always there were obstacles that seemed impossible to overcome.

Most of us must wait through years of growth and training to begin to see the work of our lives starting to come to fruition. Through these years of challenge, how important it is that we Own Our Lives by walking them in faith and obedience in our Father, God.

Sarah and me recently when I went to Oxford to help her plan her wedding. :)

Over a decade of one challenging year after the other, as she prayed and waited for God to open doors, I encouraged Sarah to keep going, keep praying, keep working. But as a parent I could not remove her from the stress she had to live through as a young adult. She had to build her own spiritual muscle one day at a time. And yet, now I see the fruit of an adult who is entering into perhaps the greatest years and most abundant work of her life. Without the faithfulness in the hard years, the fruitful years would not have been possible.

When I held Sarah as a babe in my arms, I dreamed of the Pollyanna perfect life I wanted her to have--all roses, good friends and happiness of life. Instead, as I prayed for her to become godly, the challenges of her life increased. Difficulty, illness, challenges seemed to accompany her wherever she went. When I was questioning God about his tactics, it was as though he whispered, "Make up your mind--do you want her to be spiritually strong and a shining light in her culture doing kingdom work as an adult or do you want her to be a happy wimp, without character and wisdom! I have a plan for her life that will lead her to great moral and spiritual strength, but it will require you to let me lead her through paths of training without trying to remove the difficulty along the way.

God has created us for a life that will be filled with His blessing and favor. Yet, as our parent, he wants us to thrive after we have allowed Him to build the emotional, spiritual and godly character muscles of our lives required for his work. Godliness is a process of maturity and strength that comes through years of preparing our hearts to follow Him, our wills to be obedient, and our life choices to be ones of integrity.

As we begin reading through and discussing Own Your Life through the podcasts and blog posts in the months ahead, Kristen and I hope that you will be inspired, encouraged and engaged to continue to lean into God's will and choices for your own life. Summer is such a great time to establish new rhythms and goals for life.

Is it possible that you are in a season of training grounds within God's purposes to build spiritual and emotional strength and character? How are you leaning into His plans for you? The puzzle you now find yourself living?

Below are some questions from the book that we hope you will evaluate this week as you begin this series with us. Take time to sit alone with a journal, or with the Own Your Life journal, and answer these questions as we enter into some chapters of personal evaluation.

***Am I living an intentional life?

***Am I making decisions based on Biblical values?

***Am I choosing pathways that will create deep, loving relationships and give value to the people who personally connect with me?

***Am I willing to take risks of faith to invest my life in the things of eternity?

***Am I listening to the world (peer pressure) or to the voice of God?

***Am I living with Christ and His life as the pattern of my own life?

***Do I see this day, these circumstances as a place where I can fulfill God's will for me?

Enjoy the podcast and share it with friends! It is always great to go through a book or Bible study with friends and then you build your own support system.

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Nathan is flying in today to work more intensely with me on our new book about different, out of the box kids and how God gave us a story of grace for him and for me. If you have a child who is difficult, hard to handle or figure out, or a challenge to your parenting, sign up for our webcast--next Tuesday, we will spend an evening together sharing our story in a live webcast. Hope you can join us. Sign up by putting your curser on the box below and you can read more about the webcast!

Hope you have a great week. I am praying for those of you who come to my blog each day.

Engaging Your Children With Story and History

"Sally, do you ever wish there were some men who could tell your boys stories of great accomplishments, or mentor them in godly character--maybe at a place of work, or in serving others in ministry? Or women who have sacrificed their lives to build a legacy of faith and love in their family? I feel like there is no one who can show my children how to be courageous, self-sacrificing, humble, strong.I just wish I had more real live examples."

This from a friend whose children are entering the teen years.

I hear this often--where are the men willing to disciple and mentor, the women who are willing to teach me how to be effective. I long for someone to talk to in real life."

I hear this all the time. How we need to see people--us--stepping up to the bat to be strong for God so others will have a model to follow.

The eleventh chapter of Hebrews pays tribute to men and women—Abel, Abraham, Sarah, David, and many others—who lived in the warp and woof of life’s trials but, instead of giving in to the cultural norms of compromise, kept their eyes on heaven and lived exceptional lives. They made decisions to trust God in all the hard places, and as a result “God is not ashamed to be called their God” (verse 16).

These are people who made the story of the Bible worth knowing, the men and women who set a pattern for us to follow. They are our spiritual heroes—and we are called to follow in their footsteps.

We hear a lot about heroes these days, mostly in terms of specific acts of physical or emotional bravery. We celebrate soldiers and firefighters and get excited about civilians who pull strangers from burning vehicles. We love to watch movies about “good guys” fighting “forces of evil” on a grand scale and superheroes with special powers. Such tales of heroism can be entertaining and even inspiring. But they often give a limited and skewed picture of what it really means to be a hero.

Biblical heroism starts with a passion to love and serve God through actions, stewardship, relationships, and obedience. Often, they go unnoticed. True heroes are in the habit of serving others because they are compelled to give of themselves as Jesus gave. They are motivated to endure and do good not only in big, climactic battles but also in the grind of everyday living. And when a sacrifice is required, when the need to lay down one’s life for another comes along, true heroes are not surprised; they have already been imagining this to be their service of worship to God.

 I fear, our culture is deficient in that kind of hero. I recently found myself in a meeting with a group of high- level business leaders.

The conversation centered on new recruits from universities, many of whom were already in a position to make important decisions. I can still remember an elderly executive, an advisor for and recruiter of many of these newest team members, who shared his unvarnished thoughts.

The problem, he said, was that most younger college graduates who were applying for these positions were ill prepared to take on such responsibility. “They have not read broadly on many subjects and haven’t developed a strong worldview. Their image of themselves does not include hard work, sacrifice, or perspective from others who have gone before to lay a legacy of faithfulness. Their work can be sloppy, their initiative is non-existent, and laziness is a norm. As a consequence, they have almost no historical perspective of what character was in generations gone by.

“Because they are media dependent,” he added, these kids “are subject to believing popular views espoused by that media.

Because they have been raised on quick sound bites and insubstantial TV ‘wisdom,’ their opinions are shallow and reactionary. Thinking clearly, synthesizing high-minded ideas, developing an appetite for substantial literature, immersing themselves in the works of great, classical thinkers—not only are these things not part of their daily habits; they are as good as alien to them. Add to that a lack of character training and an inability to do hard work through difficult seasons, and you will find it almost impossible to find an excellent candidate for work who can handle such important responsibilities.”

I fear that this executive’s words are accurate about many young adults now emerging into broader culture. While there is more information available for the taking than at any other time in history, there seems to be less understanding of truth than ever before. Few young adults of this generation seem to have been captured by the call to be true heroes in their own lives.

Scripture talks often about the perils of neglecting to guide a child. Many are easily led as sheep to moral or spiritual slaughter, so to speak, because they have never been taught to examine their values or think for themselves.

Ignorance and mental weakness bring poverty of soul and set people on a dangerous course.

When adults lack character, their children have little chance of developing it themselves. But the opposite is also true. The home, in fact, is the ideal training ground for heroes.

Mother's roles are more important than ever. They are the hero shapers, those who guide the values of their children, inspire them with great stories, train them to have the character that perseveres through temptation and trials.

Scripture commands us to love God with our whole being—heart and soul and mind (Matthew 22:37).

Mothers train hearts to love God, to have a heart for others in need

Mothers fill souls with treasures of truth, wisdom, discretion from Biblical wisdom.

Mothers capture their children's minds with great ideas, classical history, strong world views based on truth.

Where mothers are committed to shaping children into biblical servants and courageous believers, there will be hope in every generation for those who will pass on righteousness, carry on Kingdom work.

Today, your labor has eternal significance. May God give you vision for hero-shaping in your home.

(Some of this was excerpted from The Life Giving Home Experience)

And don't forget, buy your Own Your Life Books today. I am starting a new podcast series for the summer on Own Your Life to refresh and inspire you in your vision for life during this season. Kindle edition is on sale through Sunday.

Making the Most of Every Moment (part two!)

Go here if you missed part one, yesterday! Walking up the red dirt trail in the gentle sun of a perfect mountain day, Nathan and I slowly wound around the green slopes, always climbing, and chatted about memories of our family stays at the Castle in previous years. Finally, we crested the hill and came to a bench perched on the pine-covered hillside. It peered over a beautiful vista of mountains, trees, skies, and the spire of the Castle, nestled in the glen below. There near the bench were the tombstones of Dawson Trotman and his wife, Lila, who died within a year of one another. We caught our breath and sat down.

"I brought you here because it is a favorite place of mine to pray," I began, as the wind cooled us off. "Dawson Trotman started this ministry as an outreach to young military men who desperately needed to know the love and grace of God. Through his ministry thousands of young adults and college students became Christians and learned how to study the Bible and minister to others. He was just a normal man who trusted God to do great things."

As I warmed up to my story, I went on to recount for Nathan the history of how Dawson, a young man of God, had a vision for Glen Eyrie as a place to teach and train Christians from all over the world, and how he dedicated his life to "knowing God and making God known" through the ministry of The Navigators. But he did more than give his life spiritually for others; he also gave his life physically. Not long after moving to Glen Eyrie, Dawson was on a trip to New York to visit friends. On a water skiing outing, a young woman who couldn't swim was thrown into the lake. Dawson went in after her, holding her head above water until she was safe again in the boat— but before the others could reach him, he went under and drowned. He gave his life serving and saving others.

"Dawson Trotman was a great man," I said to Nathan, "and I think that God is making you into a great man too. I'm praying that, just like he did with Dawson, he'll use you to influence many people for Christ. I don't know exactly how he'll do that yet, but I am confident he will." I touched my son's hand and said, "I would like to dedicate your life to the Lord here today, in prayer. You are on the brink of venturing out into the world to discover the work God created you to do. But before I do, I want to tell you some of the special and unique qualities I see in your life that I appreciate."

I took the next few moments to remind Nathan of his many good qualities and skills—his fun personality and ease with people, his artistic and creative skills, his sketches and photographs, his ability to be such a good friend, his music, and his heart for the Lord and desire to serve him. "I can't wait to see what God does in your life," I ended. "Can we pray together to commit your life, dreams, desires for a wife, and your future work and ministry to the Lord?"

Nathan and I held hands and prayed together, yielding his life on this mountaintop to the Lord. It was one of those poignant, memorable moments that I will never forget. But it happened only because I took an opportunity to be with him and turned it into a moment to celebrate him and give his life to God.

Memory accomplished!

As we hiked back to the car, we talked and giggled and discussed lots of "stuff' that came easily to our minds. But my heart was full knowing that, whatever was ahead, we had together committed his life into God's hands, and that Nathan had let me, one more time, be a voice of truth in his life.

Be sure to click here to sign up for Nathan and my webinar two weeks from now--How to Love Your Outside the Box Kid!

Don't miss: Lifegiving Home Encounter live evening events!

Joel and I had so much fun visiting with several hundred amazing women when we traveled to North Carolina to host 2 Life Giving Home evenings with speaking and music. Many of you have invited us to speak in your areas and we are hoping to add more. But we are excited to tell you about two places we will be in the next couple of months. If you live in these areas, join us and tell your friends.

NASHVILLE AND SAN DIEGO FRIENDS: We're coming to your area! Joel and I will be providing exciting one-night events, including a workshop from me, a short concert from Joel, and an in-depth Q&A. Make sure you pick up your tickets soon!

NASHVILLE, click here!

SAN DIEGO, click here!

Making the Most of Every Moment

Rare is the day when I have even a couple of unplanned hours. My story has been one filled with my children going and coming home, ministry, people visiting from out of state, family commitments, cooking, cleaning, details of life--you know the story because we all share the scenario of too busy lives.

Because of always longing for more "me" time and just time to be and to breathe, I guard my time when I get it fiercely. Many years ago, I was looking forward to what appeared to be a clear-calendar day, allowing time to complete some work that really needed my attention--as well as time to just sit for a few minutes.

And then came the knock on my door.

In response to my hesitant "Come in," Nathan poked his head inside my room.

He had been busy all summer with his many friends who had just finished the high school portion of their lives. They had designated every single day of the summer as their "last chance" to celebrate and make memories before they went their separate ways to various schools, jobs, and internships. They banged in and out of the door almost daily, reminding me of hysterically bouncy and playful puppies frolicking, nipping, and growling at each other. Theirs was an endless circle of laughter, eating, talking, and "going somewhere"— not one moment was lost! Nathan worked as a pizza delivery boy in between and took the occasional weekend job for a local marketing company. I had given up any expectations of seeing him much during this busy season of life.

Yet, having had 2 before him, I knew that I still wanted to imprint Biblical values, messages of faith, foundations of love on his heart before he moved into adulthood.

"Hey, Mom, my friends are all busy today, and I don't have to work until tomorrow. How about you and I go out to lunch together today or go out for coffee or something since I don't have any definite plans yet?"

My mind immediately began to calculate what it would "cost"me to change my plans and give them all up for the whims of my persuasive son. I was so late getting this book written; there were just two more weeks of free time before I had to travel again; and Sarah and Joel would be back soon. Joy had spent the night at a friend's home. But, I had been praying that God would give me some alone, "discipleship" time with him. So, I made a spur-of-the-moment decision to not even contemplate the crammed agenda of the coming fall. Instead, I just looked up and smiled.

"Let me take care of a few details and make a couple of phone calls, and then my day belongs to you," I answered with as much enthusiasm as I could muster, by faith.

"Great!" he beamed back. "And I know you would just love to make me a piece of your cinnamon toast and a cup of tea if you're in the kitchen, and I would love it too. How 'bout I be your little boy today?"

I knew intuitively that someone would probably call Nathan to suggest a get-together by mid-afternoon, so I planned my time strategically. As he munched, I suggested going to Barnes & Noble for a quick look at books and music, followed by lunch at his favorite restaurant. Then I added, "And I do have one more place I want to take you that will be a little of a surprise and won't take too long. Okay? Drive to Glen Eyrie Castle," I said, knowing he knew the way. Having spoiled him for a couple of hours, I had earned a few moments to speak into his life. "I want to show you something I don't think you've ever seen."

Glen Eyrie is the beautiful headquarters and conference center of The Navigators, an international discipleship ministry. The "Castle" was built by General William Palmer, founder of Colorado Springs, for his wife on one of the choicest foothills properties in the region, surrounded by pines and red rock outcroppings. He spared no expense in building the Castle, bringing in materials and interior decor from all over the world. But like so many other Gilded Age mansions, it passed out of the family and through several owners. In 1951, God enabled Dawson Trotman to purchase the Castle and surrounding property for The Navigators...

Join me tomorrow for part two!  And make plans to join Nathan and I on May 24th for a special webinar, How to Love Your Outside the Box Kid. Sign up here!

Also, Don't miss: Lifegiving Home Encounter live evening events!

Joel and I had so much fun visiting with several hundred amazing women when we traveled to North Carolina to host 2 Life Giving Home evenings with speaking and music. Many of you have invited us to speak in your areas and we are hoping to add more. But we are excited to tell you about two places we will be in the next couple of months. If you live in these areas, join us and tell your friends.

San Diego, Friday, June 24, 7:00 P.M.

Brentwood, Tennessee (Nashville)  July 14, 7:00 P.M.

New Live events, and a new online Webinar, "How to Love Your Outside-the-Box Kid"!

Friends, I am so excited to announce new dates for our continuing Lifegiving Home Encounter events, and to announce a special webinar with my son, Nathan Clarkson! We love getting a chance to have a real conversation with so many of you, and these events help us achieve that. We hope to see you at one of these upcoming happenings! San Diego and Nashville here we come! LIFEGIVING HOME ENCOUNTER LIVE EVENTS, WITH SALLY AND JOEL

SAN DIEGO, CA - Community Bible Church Mira Mesa: June 24th, from 7-9:30PM. 

BRENTWOOD, TN - Fellowship Bible Church:- July 14th, from 7-9:30PM.

There are a limited number of early bird tickets, so get yours early!

SPECIAL WEBINAR EVENT!

May 24th

Online Webinar Event

7PM-9:30PM

$12.99

REGISTER HERE!

So many of you have asked me to share about my experience raising Nathan, my special, "superman" child. With OCD, ADHD, and a unique and challenging personality, Nathan was my "different" kid. In this two-hour online webinar, Nathan and I will have a dynamic conversation, with Nathan sharing about growing up feeling different than everyone else, and me sharing about learning how to love Nathan and see him the way God did. It wasn't easy for either of us, but God has an amazing story to tell with Nathan's life, and He appointed me to guide Nathan in to the hero I knew he could be. Today, as Nathan works as a filmmaker and actor in New York City, we are both able to look back on an incredible story of God's faithfulness. Tune in to hear us have an honest and insightful discussion, and gain wisdom for how to love and guide your own "mysterious" children.

The event is on Tuesday, May 24th, at 7PM Mountain Standard Time. Your $12.99 registration fee will include access both to the live event, and to the video to watch again after the event is over. It usually takes us a week or two to prepare the video for viewing following the live event, so if you have registered for the event, but were not able to watch live, keep an eye out for an email update at a later point with that information.

IMPORTANT: The video is discounted if you buy it before the event. If you purchase the video after the event is over, the price will increase. Even if you aren't able to watch it on the night of, if you register ahead of time, you will still get access to the video, and at a discounted price.

We can't wait to see you there!

REGISTER HERE!

May 24th

Online Webinar Event

7PM-9:30PM

$12.99

Taking Charge of your Circumstances to Write a Great Life Story

Sitting outside on my front porch, facing the chill air of an autumn evening, dark thoughts whirling around my head, I seethed with anger and poured out my thoughts to God.

"I give so much. I love so much. I try so hard to do what is right. I also fail. But it feels like my life just keeps being so hard, so heavy, too much. I just don't feel like I can handle what you have given to me."

This particular memory came from the challenging years of one of my teenage children who was making poor choices. But it could have been during

my first year of marriage,

or when I had three children under five and was exhausted and hopeless that I would ever accomplish anything

or when we had money difficulties, again,

or when my son had all the letters I did not understand, (ocd, add, odd, slight autistic issues, a learning disability) and never gave me rest or peace in my days

or when family was just plain hard,

or when people hurt me, (especially fellow Christians)

and or I was lonely again amidst our 17 moves,

or or or.......

Though God created idealism in our hearts because he made us for a perfect world, and we can still imagine what our world should be like, all of us will be subject to the fallenness of this place, the challenges and difficulties of being alive amidst so many years separated from God's perfect will. And so often, our lives will be difficult because of our own unwise choices or because of the lack of wisdom or abuse of others. It is age old and historically true for all generations.

In these struggling places, it is natural to be sad, fearful, disappointed, disheartened, discouraged. And we need to give ourselves room, at times to grieve. Please know I feel so much for all of you who are in the midst of so much. I wish I had known someone to talk to through my difficulties. I do pray for you all.

Yet, it is in these very challenging places that our responses to our circumstances, to God and to others will determine the eternal fruit of our lives. It is when life is so very troubled that heroes are made. They may have the same feelings of fear, being overwhelmed, wanting to run. But they become heroes because they act courageously.

Even this past couple of weeks I have had about 5 amazing women verbalize defeat because of overwhelmingly serious circumstances--including a husband addicted pornography, a prodigal son going down a road of danger, issues with teens, a sweet one whose husband left her for another, and several just plain exhausted, burned out women who need a good rest and encouragement.

So often instead of learning to move beyond the chaos or threatening circumstances of our lives towards order or healing or productivity or Biblical solution, cultural voices give us every reason to compromise our ideals and values at these difficult junctures.

Often, we live in blame, (it's someone else's fault), or fear, (I don't think anything is going to turn out well--I feel so desperate and out of control), or bitterness, (this isn't fair) or defiance or depression (I will live in anger, I give up, I will be a victim of my circumstances, because I do not feel I am capable of getting out of this--I don't see any way forward.) or despair (I don't think things will ever changes.).

Courage and strength in a fallen world is one of the gifts Jesus came to give to us.  His heart was to bring healing in relationships, to provide hope when we are tempted to despair, to bring rest to our weariness, to give wisdom to our befuddlement and peace to our fearful hearts

One of my children was with a friend last week and they talked about how glad they had parents that were "Can do," parents. I asked her what they meant by this.

My child responded, "When we faced a challenge or difficulty or something we wanted to do, but couldn't afford, or had a dream that seemed impossible, you and my friend's parents all responded, "Let's see how we can accomplish your dreams, or make money to afford the costs of your activity. Or, I know that God loves you very much and this is a training grounds for you--let's trust Him to cause all of this difficulty to turn out for your good. Basically, you always gave us a way to live forward and to make progress or to find a solution."

We talked longer at the dinner table this week as a family about this concept and we came up with three basic responses to life we see in action as a grid for living life through many of our friends and colleagues.I can do it--we will find a way forward, we will trust God, we will take action, we will be obedient

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Philippians 4:13

I can do it grid of life.

--We will find a way forward, we will trust God, we will take action, we will be obedient.

I can't do it grid of life.

                     "There also we saw the Nephilim (the sons of Anak are part of the Nephilim); and                         we became like grasshoppers in our own sight, and so we were in their sight." Numbers 13:33

I give up, this is too much, I cannot overcome my past, I don't think there is a way forward, I just don't have the confidence of faith that I can overcome my circumstances or difficulties.

         (Becoming a grasshopper in our own eyes when facing giants happened to the leaders of Israel when             they faced the giants in the promised land.)

I won't do it grid of life. 

But Jonah got up and went in the opposite direction to get away from the LORD.  Jonah 1:3

I don't want to do it! I am not willing to pay the price of what obedience would cost me, I want to run my own life, I want God to do things my way, I am not willing to humble myself or to change

Of course these are simplistic descriptions of life and I cannot cover all the bases in one article. As you read this article, do you see yourself in one of these mindsets? Where are you in your faith-walk with God Midst your stressful journey of life?  Are you a "can do" or a "can't do" or a "won't do."

Jesus said, "In this world you have tribulation, (great stress). But, take courage, I have overcome the world." John 16:33

There is so much in scripture to address all of these attitudes--and perhaps we display all of these grids at different moments of our lives. But I believe that God wants us to learn, day by day, in all circumstances and relationships, to trust Him, to find courage in our hearts and to practice getting stronger in the power of His Holy Spirit, to live our stories faithfully, to move from chaos or fear to a place of order, productivity and peace of mind.

Because I have had so many letters, messages and emails lately about so many women's circumstances that seem overwhelming, I thought I would take the next few Monday's to go through Own Your Life on my podcasts. I will be taking one chapter a week and apply it to women's issues, marriage, motherhood, and a practical application for children.

Wherever you find yourself in life, whatever season, I will be including ideas about education, lots of scripture, applications to women in general and to moms alike.

My publishers even said they would put Own Your Life on sale on Kindle, and through all ebook stores so that those of you who do not have it could purchase it and study the book along with me--only one chapter a week. So I have connected this book below to a place where you can purchase Own Your Life on sale in all the places audio is sold. I have also included a connection to the physical book, as well  as the Bible study guide for each chapter with new stories, verses, questions and applications.

I hope this is of great encouragement to you. It has already been so very encouraging to me in the present circumstances of my own life as I have been preparing for this. Hope you also enjoy the podcast today where Kristen and I introduce this series which will begin next Monday. (We wanted to give you a chance to order the book if you do not already have it.)

Be inspired this summer to Own Your Life and to Own your life puzzle and circumstances in order to flourish right where you are. It is my hope that this series will refresh you as you take a break from the busy school year and breathe in God's grace right where you are.

The Book

The Study Guide and Planner

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Making Time for Delightful Play

The memory of camping out on our deck under an endless expanse of twinkling stars, aspen leaves shivering and whispering in the mountain breeze, staring into the vast canopy of space and squinting to see a fleeting shooting star, is still as vivid to me now as it was when our family experienced it so many years ago. Even in the midst of the overwhelming, nonstop craziness of our family life, those nights of sleeping out under the stars were transformative. The simple act of going outside and enjoying nature changed the entire tone of our life together.

In the bustle of a busy household, especially when people are overworked and tired, tempers tend to flare and unkind words are spoken. It happens to everyone, and it certainly happened to us— often.

In my urge to get things done, I would turn into a drill sergeant and the rest of the family, depending on their personalities, would rebel or turn sullen or simply disappear.

At such times, what we all needed was a vacation—time to rest, play, and escape the machine of busyness for a time. A vacation wasn’t always feasible, but we found that camping at home could be just the ticket to ease our stress and cool our irritations.

The night would invariably begin with pizza and root beer floats for the kids. We would take our meal outside and enjoy it in the cool, refreshing mountain air. Once done with dinner, the kids would take to our expansive yard, running wildly around playing flashlight tag as dusk descended. I would watch from the second- story deck with Clay, gazing out toward Colorado Springs. Our house at the time sat on a long ridge nestled up against the foothills of the Rockies, more than a thousand feet higher than most of the population in the city.

So when I looked out, I could see the whole metropolis spanning before me, the infinite lights sparkling below. Even after a few short minutes, I could feel myself relaxing, my spirit growing quieter.

(It was on one of these amazing evenings when four-year-old Joy said, “Mama, wif all dese lights in de sky sparkling, everybody can see Jesus is a good Artist.”)

My life in those days was hyper-focused on the mundane challenges in my immediate line of sight. But God wanted to show me that there was so much more of beauty, light, and life to be experienced just inches above the surface of my hectic life. I could not perceive it because the false lights of the world and the noisy voices of others had drowned out the beauty God meant for me. But He patiently waited for me with a world of beauty prepared to overwhelm my senses and transform my perspective.

Do you remember the story of Jesus’ friend Mary, who loved to hang out with her Lord, and of her hardworking sister Martha, who bitterly resented it? Martha complained, “Lord, do You not care that my sister has left me to do all the serving alone?” (Luke 10:40).

Jesus immediately understood what Martha needed most—and it wasn’t help with the housework! He answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and bothered about so many things; but only one thing is necessary, for Mary has chosen the good part, which shall not be taken away from her” (verses 41-42).

I have spent far too much of my life in Martha’s place of workaholic anxiety, lost in the maze of my worries. I always intend to enjoy each day, to enjoy time with my husband and children, to memorize the golden moments that make the love in our home so special to my heart.

But all too often I have just kept on trudging forward, obsessed with getting things done. By the time I begin to question whether I have truly captured the essence of God’s presence in a given day, I have already lost what could have been the joy of the Spirit moving in my life. How easy it is for me to focus on the to-do list and to miss what could be experienced and enjoyed.

The Ministry of Beauty in Your Home when Rest is Needed

Bumping through the clouds with the turbulence of a spring snow storm irritated my frazzled nerves as we neared the airport in Denver late Saturday night. With blowing snow, icy roads and streams of light flashing from hundreds of headlights, I prayed, "Please, Lord, let us get over the mountain pass without a wreck."

Though my spirit had soared through 3 speaking gatherings with precious, generous hearted women  in North Carolina, getting to bed after midnight each night had left me moving ahead slowly as we traveled to Philadelphia and two more ministry meetings. I had been home less than a week from England before this trip.

Watching my heart and mind from inside my spirit, I could see that I needed a rest and a couple of days to fall apart. We all have to step back some days in order to keep going forward.

Lighting several candles, the gas fireplace, (10 inches of new snow outside!), sipped warm coffee and had a tray light snacks to nibble, I settled into my couch covered in a warm blanket and snuggled up with a book, while my favorite music playlist wandered across my mental landscape. Somehow the beauty and rare quiet of the moment began to provide rest and an atmosphere of refueling I sorely needed.

Beauty and order in a home give a sense of stability and grace to a frazzled spirit. Home is my favorite place to be and ordering my life, and the lives of my family around familiar habits that give beauty and bring rest has served all of us for years amidst our busy ministry traveling schedule.

Pieces of family artifacts give familiar pleasure to our souls because they speak of family stability family comfort. All our little knick knacks have a story, a meaning to our family alone. Throughout our marriage, Clay and I have made it a habit to memorialize special events in our lives with something beautiful. On our honeymoon, we purchased a small pressed flower arrangement mounted between two pieces of glass that stood on attached legs. It has stayed with us all these years to remind us of God's love and care for us, as depicted in our marriage verse, "Observe how the lilies of the field grow; they do not toil nor do they spin, yet I say to you that not even Solomon in all his glory clothed himself like one of these" (Matthew 6:28-29, NASB).

Humanity's ability to appreciate beauty is a distinctive mark of God's image within us, much like our ability to use language. God made us to enjoy and benefit from beauty, whether in the things he created or in the things we create. In contrast to the common and crass things of this world, which have a negative effect on our spirits, we are naturally drawn to and find pleasure in expressions of beauty—majestic mountains, burning sunsets, starry heavens, captivating paintings, inspiring music, moving poetry. Beauty brings us closer to the Creator, whose very nature and presence is the ultimate expression of beauty.

I have filled my home with expressions of beauty because I need to stay in touch with that part of God's image within me. It is a reminder to me in the midst of so much that is common and dull that I live in a world created by a God of unadulterated beauty and unlimited creativity. Beautiful pictures on the walls, a creative centerpiece, a roaring fire, a bright spray of flowers, flickering candlelight at dinner, creative calligraphy, lovely books, classical music—all are ways that I can bring beauty into my home.

Even a small touch of beauty can minister to my spirit. Some years ago, a cranky washing machine died in the middle of the night. We were greeted the next morning by two inches of water covering the kitchen and living room floors. Every towel in the house was called into action to mop up the kitchen, and the living room soon became a disaster area with stuff and furniture piled in the center of the room. It was a mess.

At the end of that day, a friend brought me a small pot of beautiful petit roses. As I endured the mess in succeeding days, I drew pleasure from those lovely roses each time I passed them. In spite of the chaos surrounding them, I found myself refreshed by the flowers' beauty and loveliness.

I have found two keys that unlock the ministry of beauty in my home: to be creative in using beauty, and to take the time to admire it. To drink some tea is one thing; to savor a tea time with a creatively set table, candles, music, and a beautiful book is quite another.  A cup of tea may temporarily satisfy the palate, but a tea time can satisfy the soul if you take the time to unlock the beauty that is possible there, and to truly enjoy the person with whom you are sharing the moment. And to offer a friend or a child or husband, not only a cup of tea, but a tea time of close friendship will build deep threads of love between hearts.

Beauty keeps my spirit refreshed. Without it, my spirit becomes dull and lifeless; with it,I am invigorated and encouraged. God has certainly made beauty a priority in his universe, so I can imitate him by making room for beauty in my home.

What can you do today, this week, to make a memorable time with your child, your friend, your husband--all who may need refreshment to their souls. How about you? What anchors can you build into your life that will give you a mini-retreat along the way.

Be inspired with new ideas of how to do this in The Lifegiving Home.

You can find The Lifegiving Home on Amazon.re on Amazon!