Three miscarriages into my motherhood, one of which I had almost died and had to be whisked to the emergency room to save my life, had left me with one more moment of, "God, I know it is not reasonable to ask you for this miracle," sort of prayer.
But God says, "Without faith, it is impossible to please Him," right? And so one of the most profound times of perservering in prayer in my life, was praying, asking, begging, against all odds, for one more little baby, when I was 41 years old and soon to be beyond child bearing. But by my forties, I had fallen in love with my children and with motherhood.
And so that prayer was providentially answered, given generously and blessed my 40ish old life with my darling, overwhelmingly delightful, Joy.
And so this morning, I am missing her, while she is far off at college, but with a smile in my heart, because she often brings smiles to my life. And this is what I read on her facebook as I was closing out my day last night:
Confession: I LOVE that I was home schooled. Call me nerdy, antisocial, or culturally irrelevant... I know it's just cause you're jealous YOU didn't get to learn about the Revolutionary war in your pajamas whilst drinking hot chocolate. ;-)
Joy
And so I left a comment on her page:
"Your teacher highly approves of this confession." :) (the maker of hot chocolate)
It is in seeing the little things in life, his whispers, where we find our joy, (pun intended).
I wonder what it feels like to know that you are a very specific answer to prayer..........
"From almost my first day as a Christian, I have made it a daily priority to meet with God, to read books about Him, and to do in-depth studies of His Scripture. This habit and these times have built an incredible treasury of truth in my heart and soul from which I draw strength for my life. A daily, regular quiet time when I read the Bible, seek His wisdom, and pray to Him for my needs each day has been the means through which I am able to stay faithful as a mom.
Without this constant coming to Him, my life would be built on a foundation that would be swept out from under me in times of crisis. I have seen this so many times in my life. Jesus put this in picture-book terms when He told the story of the kinds of houses men build. He said:
Everyone who hears these words of Mine and acts on them, may be compared to a wise man who built his house on the rock. And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and slammed against that house; and yet it did not fall, for it had been founded on the rock. Everyone who hears these words of Mine and does not act on them, will be like a foolish man, who built his house on the sand. The rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and slammed against that house; and it fell--and great was its fall." Matthew 7:24-27
A life built apart from the Word of God is a life doomed to crumble. But if we, as moms, walk this journey with God's Word as our source of wisdom and life; if we listen to and apply the words of Jesus, we will indeed have a house (family) that stands through trials and difficulties. We will have a spiritual legacy that will last through eternity." ~ from The Mom Walk
One of the Clarkson girls' favorite places to visit is Biltmore estate in Asheville, N.C. I often think as we walk the beautiful paths there about the awesome foundation that must be beneath that enormous home. The foundation of a large estate takes longer to build and uses more material, but the estate it holds will serve far more people and host more life events well.
In the midst of cultural upheaval, political uncertainty, and the regular ups and downs of daily life, it becomes more and more important every day to pay attention to the foundations of our souls--to build well, to build strong and to build with intention and skill. Taking time to dig and build ensures the strength to persevere through wind and rain that surely is on its way, if not here already. And teaching our children to do the same is one of the best investments of time we can make as moms.
How strong are your foundations? How prepared are you for the storms that will come your way?
If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world.” C. S. Lewis
I am a restless sort. I am probably not responsible at heart. Committed and loving, and that takes me a long way in this world of duty and shoulds,
But, occasionally the responsibilities overwhelm and the gypsy in me longs for adventure, beauty, wildness, wind on my face, escape from all that is mundane,
maybe sitting on a beach in the dark of night listening to the waves crashing and splashing on the shore
or watching the night stars on a clear moonlit night in the cool of the mountains, and a longing that won't go away
a longing for something I cannot exactly define,
fills my heart with yearning.
Loving and serving those in my life is not compromised when I feel that "longing" for a place that is not this place, no matter how beautiful and lovely this place is.
This world gives shadows of what we were meant to know, but as Paul says, "we see in a mirror dimly."
Is your life ever quiet enough to sense the longing for the place He is preparing, but sensing that this is not quite it?
God would not have us feel guilty for the truth of those places in our hearts where mystery swirls and sways with no defining places, no neatly wrapped package with all the answers tied up. Faith is a willingness to be in the tension of the place with no answers, and yet saying in our heart, "I will hold fast even when I don't see or know."
Eternity in our souls--it was placed there by Him, the Creator; we were made for another world. Because He never wanted us to love this world that will pass away, to be so rooted here that we didn't want to leave--
but to remember what He said,
"My kingdom is not of this world."
Do you ever feel that longing and ache for what is not here but will be?
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Be sure to join us tonight for a Facebook Party to kick off MomHeart/TheBetterMom's Book Club featuring Dancing With My Father! The party begins at 9pm EST. Just click the button to find us at MomHeart's page!
Fall! It's officially here, with drifting leaves and renegade snowflakes announcing the beginning of the cozying-in season.
I hope it's a favorite of yours, too. While most of us enjoy lots of outdoor time and trips away over the summer, it seems everyone turns their thoughts toward home a bit more come fall. Here are a few ideas to help you add some fall flavor to your home.
Sally's Secret Cinnamon Cider
1 gallon apple cider
1 cup-1 bag of red hot candies (choose your flavor level, wink!*)
Stir together on the stove over medium heat until hot. That's it! So much easier than bundles of spices, yummy, and makes your house smell amazing. I make the cider the real way, too, but when I have my Bible study crowds, I use the Apple cider and red hots as it is fast and goes a long way! (My mom used to do this!) Now, I have found mulling bags at Whole Foods and I place one bag in a cup of organic apple juice for my sweet ones and sit by the fire and soak in being with them.
Caramel Apples
These may seem tricky, and they're very expensive at the fairs and candy shops, but you can make your own quite easily! Only three ingredients:
6 firm apples (green Granny Smiths are great, as their tart taste balances the caramel's sweetness)
1 pkg individually wrapped caramels
2 Tbs. water
aaaannnnddd ... that's it! Of course, you also need wooden craft sticks of some sort (sometimes they come in the bag, or check the craft store!)
Prepare first a cookie sheet or tray by covering it with tin foil which you then spray or butter. This will give you a place to put the dipped apples and an easy way to get them into the fridge for "setting time." Insert wooden sticks about 3/4 into the stem end of apples. Unwrap caramels and place into saucepan; add the 2 Tbs. water and melt over medium heat, stirring smooth. Holding apples by wooden sticks, dip into caramel, turning to coat evenly and scraping off excess on side of pan if necessary. Place apples on greased foil, then refrigerate for 30 minutes to an hour.
If you do want to get fancy, a shake of chopped nuts or candy leaf sprinkles while the caramel is still soft, or even a drizzle of melted chocolate after it sets can take them up a notch!
My mama also did this every year and I thought she was a gourmet cook! :)
To make things pretty, you might consider creating a fall tablecloth you bring out only during this season! There are many lovely prints available in hues of brown, gold, crimson and purple. If you want lots of choices for little money, consider buying a few yards of a fall-y print from the craft store; no sewing necessary--just cut the edges with pinking sheers (I still have one I created many years ago this way! I got 3 yards and spread it out on our very long table and had 18 sit at our fall table for cupcakes and cider.)
Did you know you can turn a plain pumpkin into something special with just some glue and a bit of glitter? The kids like to get in on this one. Pour a bit of glue onto a paper plate and add water to make it "paintable." Then use a small foam brush to brush the glue onto your pumpkins. A few shakes of gold, clear or orange glitter and you've got a pumpkin all ready to grace the table with no messy cutting necessary!
I hope you're looking forward to the snuggly season as much as I am!
Don't forget to enter my giveaway for a mentoring session--we will be announcing the winners at our Facebook party for the launch of MomHeart Online/TheBetterMom's next Book Club selection, Dancing With My Father! Join us on the MomHeart Facebook page Thursday, October 11th at 9pm EST for all the fun!
"Mama, I can't wait to come home and just be together as a family."
With the chaos of voices clamoring for our soul allegiance, the pressures to conform to cultural values, the constant compromise of moral values, the redefining of family structure, the world can be a calamitous, draining and confusing place.
Satan who comes as an angel of light is always seeking to draw away the allegiance of every human being from the values of the kingdom of God and our heart allegiance to God our creator and King.
Home fires, traditions shared, meals eaten in fellowship together over the messages of life, values upheld, histories made and the stories of them told and celebrated are the roots that go deep into the heart of a child to keep them tethered to the truth of the Gospel and the foundations of faith.
Our hearth with all things Clarkson
It is our history and roots that keep us faithful and give us the strength to refuse the draw of Satan.
We craft the beauty of the kingdom of home, so that our children and our husbands; so that we have a place to belong, a history to uphold, a purpose to guide our decisions and our ways. The accountability of a family who loves one another and says, "I am here for you. I believe in you. I need you. I will help you," calls to the desires in each person to a place where they are valued and where they belong.
The life of our home is not just about "house beautiful", but it is a "life" that draws the heart to all that is true. The crafting of our home life validates the reality of God's love and redemption in a place that satisfies a soul that longs for stability and foundations that cannot be shaken.
So day to day, is not merely about correcting immaturity or organizing meals, it is about the Life of Jesus incarnating the moments with love, truth, beauty, faith so that every child who leaves its walls will always have a place to come home to and feel that they will always have the gift of belonging to a people, a history and a place that is safe and strong.
This is my first attempt to do a Monday Mentoring. I will improve as I go! Please let me know what you think!
Be sure to enter for the mentoring giveaway and please sign up on RSS here and on Momheart.org and on Thebettermom.com as you register for the mentoring giveaway. Help us reach some more wonderful moms with these messages and encouragement!
Remember, we will have a great book club discussion for Dancing with My Father on Facebook here and you get an extra entry if you sign up on Facebook. We will have fun leaving comments and discussing the topic there. But for those of you who are not on facebook, we will have the same videos and Bible studies on TheBetterMom.com and on Momheart.org.
Be sure to plan on coming to join us at our Mom Heart Conferences this year! I am getting pretty excited as we prepare and plan. We have the best speakers, great luncheon planned and you get to have a retreat in a lovely hotel with your friends--that is the best part for me--seeing sweet friends and celebrating life together.
Remember you can get a $10 book table certificate if you sign up before November 1. (If you win our giveaways when we offer them, we will refund your money if you win!) We are expecting to sell out in a couple of locations, so be sure to plan now and tell your friends not to tarry! It will make a great Christmas gift. For more information, go here!
I am sitting in my little library, looking out at the aspens in our driveway, noticing that fall is almost over and enjoying the color.
I am reading The Yearling, one of the best old books, and the theme of some great music I have been listening to by an artist, a family favorite and friend. More about that later.
I drank Pumpkin Pie Latte on the way home from church because my sweet friend, Rachael told me they were so delicious. (Thanks, Rachael, you are right.)
Loved church this morning and love people who make me want to worship Him more.
Having tea time with Sarah and Clay with Carrot Cake.
Listening to Nathan's acoustic music and thinking how much I like his songs.
Thinking about how much I enjoyed having Joel home and how I love it that he is terribly idealistic.
Having left over pizza with Sarah and Clay with Salad and so glad not to be cooking again.
Looking forward to having everyone home over Thanksgiving and planning the meals.
Praying for Joy in her speech tournament and hoping she has a good day and gets some sleep. (I can still mother from far away.)
Thinking how grateful I am to have so many friends out there and how I pray for you so often.
Now to my books.....a nap...a walk....and who knows what else.
To celebrate, I have a special drawing for you! If you would like a chance to win 45 minutes of mentoring time over the phone with me, I'd love to have you enter using this form. The winner will be announced at the party next week!
a Rafflecopter giveaway
I do hope you will join us for the Book Club this season, as I believe this book will be a blessing and encouragement to so many who wonder how they can find joy in their lives in the midst of difficulty and trial. We are very excited about partnering with The Better Mom website for this study! There will be two posts every week at MomHeart Online and TheBetterMom, as well as occasional vlogs by yours truly. We will be having a Facebook party on Thursday, October 11th beginning at 9pm EST, and we invite you to join the Book Club by joining our Facebook page at MomHeart/TheBetterMom Book Club: Dancing. The Book Club will have its first official post on Tuesday, October 16th. You can read more about it here: Dancing With My Father Book Club
FINDING HELP, ENCOURAGEMENT AND INSTRUCTION FOR THE JOURNEY OF MOTHERHOOD
For more than thirty years, Clay and I have been involved in ministry. Seeing the need for people to be discipled and mentored, we have sought to develop both resources and relationships that expand the Kingdom of God through building His people.
I receive many requests each day from people who would like me to help them with various issues in their families, offer advice about what to do with their children, or just need a kind word. How I wish I could find time to reach out in response to everyone who has a need!Added to that are the requests from various groups, publishers, and event planners who would like me to come speak in many corporate settings, write articles or attend conferences. It's always a joy for me to sit down with a mom over a cup of tea or coffee, sorting out tangled situations and offering a bit of encouragement. And I'm always honored by requests to speak to groups, and doing so has become fairly easy as well, with years of talks under my belt and plenty of hours of Bible study informing my own opinions on being a mom.
Travel, however, and limited time have become somewhat the bane of my existence! In these past few years I've had to come to the conclusion that my health and peace both suffer when I push myself too hard.
My priority must always be to walk in integrity with my own family. I truly believe that if I do not live my own message at home, I have no need to open my mouth at all. And so I can promise you that I imperfectly but quite wholeheartedly live by all the principles I've learned and taught over these many years, and will continue to do so.
This means I'm saying "no" far more often than in the past, to requests both public and private. It's been a difficult conclusion to come to, but I've been reminded again recently that while I feel guilty in disappointing people who ask for my help. But if you would bear with me for a minute, I realized that God has already worked through our ministry over the years as I was raising my own four children--- so many resources available right now-- that would be great mentoring tools for all the moms who have requested help.
The truth is, the Lord has already enabled me to pour my heart and life messages out where they can be accessed by anyone searching for help! And so I wanted to put a little description here of several resources you can find easily, with the hope that they might encourage you in your life as a mom.
First, I've written five books about motherhood which are currently available (the sixth, Desperate, written with SarahMae, will be released January 8th, 2013!) You may purchase any of these by clicking the title in red! I'm including the descriptions so you'll know what each is about.
"A classic book of encouragement for your seasons as a homeschooling mother. Your heart will be encouraged as you read the touching stories, spiritual insights, and personal lessons that are the seasons in Sally Clarkson’s life. She opens her own seasoned heart on these pages, sharing what she has learned as a homeschooling wife and mother about herself, her children, and her Lord. First published in 1998, this revised and expanded Second Edition includes four new essays by Sally from “ten years later” to introduce each section."
"In The Mission of Motherhood Sally explores the 'big picture' biblical design of God for motherhood. It is a vision that transcends cultures and trends.
Drawing on challenging insights from Scripture enlightened by her own experiences as a mother for 18 years, Sally paints a biblical and very personal portrait of motherhood that reveals the heart of God for all mothers of all times. This book, filled with personal anecdotes and stories, will refresh your vision for biblical motherhood, renew your commitment to your precious children, and prayerfully bring the reviving Spirit of God into your home and family."
"In a personal and devotional style, Sally addresses how a mother can spiritually shape and influence the precious hearts and lives entrusted to her care by looking to the life and ministry of Jesus. She examines the relationship between Jesus and his disciples, and suggests a plan for influencing children for Christ using the acrostic GIFTS: Grace,Inspiration, Faith, Training and Service. It is an uncomplicated yet strategic plan for passing on crucial gifts to your children. In the dailyness of providing for your children’s physical, emotional, and social needs, Sally helps you ensure that vital opportunities for spiritual nurture and training are not lost in the shuffle. Using biblical wisdom and practical teachings, Sally shows how you can make a lasting difference in your child’s life by following the pattern Christ set with his own disciples. The LifeGIFTS model will inspire and equip you to embrace the rewarding, desperately needed, and immeasurably valuable ministry of motherhood."
You love being a mom. You are wholeheartedly committed to your children. You long for them to grow up to be mature, loving, fruitful, and faithful followers of God. But you know that means you are called to be that kind of mom. It means you must be faithful on God’s path of motherhood for you.
That is your mom walk. It is how you walk with God as mother. It is how you seek Him, trust Him, live in His grace, and draw on His strength one step of faith at a time. The mom walk is your path:
P: How you walk with Purpose as a mother
A: How you walk with Assurance as a mother
T: How you walk with Trust as a mother
H: How you walk with Heart as a mother
In The Mom Walk you journey alongside Sally Clarkson in her own walk as a mother after God’s heart. Through her personal stories from twenty-seven years of motherhood, inspiring and challenging truths from Scripture, and spiritual insights from both the dark and light sides of the journey, you will find renewed encouragement for your own mom walk with God."
And here's a little announcement: the MomHeart Online blog will be having its fall Book Club starting soon, and we'll be studying my most recently published book, Dancing With My Father!
"Dancing with My Father is Sally Clarkson’s personal journey to discover how to live a life of grace and joy in the Lord. As a busy Christian woman in a world often filled with disappointments, difficulties, and even desparing moments, Sally wanted to know how to experience the presence of God and the spiritual joy promised so often in the Scriptures. She shares how she learned to “Rejoice in the Lord always!” and in all seasons of life. If you feel a need to be refreshed and restored in the joy of the Lord, join Sally as she shares the secrets of Dancing with My Father."
In addition to book writing, of course, I've had the privilege of speaking to thousands of moms over the years in large groups. The MomHeart Conference is the main venue in which I've poured out my heart over the years, and all the sessions are available to you now as instantly downloadable audios! That's 13 sets of 3-4 audios, and they're priced at only $2.99 each. You can find all of them here: MomHeart Audio.
Please know how deeply I care about each one of you who writes, calls, or emails me, though it's impossible for me to answer each one. And please know that most of what I would tell you has already been put into one of our books, one of our tapes or a blog post, orsomewhere you can reach it! Through reading my books or listening to my talks, I pray you will find a philosophy of waiting on God, of obeying Him, of walking in grace with your children, of following His example, and of faithfulness.
I don't believe there are formulas to give, and I do not understand your particular family puzzle well enough to tell you just exactly what to do, anyway! That is your glory --to live your own story in faith and obedience to His heart for you and your family. But I do believe that by applying biblical principles, you too can build a strong family that honors the Lord, and I pray you'll find help in some of these resources!
So, I hope you will join us in this book study, or make use of one of our resources, as my desire is to be of encouragement, even though I cannot answer as many personal messages or speak as often as it is requested--but you can find so much of all that we would say on our resource pages.
And remember, if you would like to enter for an 45 minute mentoring session, sign up on our rss, or post an announcement on twitter or face book and leave a comment about what you have done. Thanks so much for helping us get the word out!
Also, don't miss this 31 Days series by our MomHeart Contributor and also my friend, Elizabeth Foss! She's studying The Mission of Motherhood this month. You can read the posts by clicking her button, here!
Chill wind is blowing outside my door and the aspen leaves are dancing in the glory of golden spangles. Life has been so very busy that I have hardly had time to take in the beauty, changing color and to breathe in this lovely fall weather.
So, today, I am putting aside duty and deadlines to sit and sip hot cider, to sit in my "cozy" chair and read a story and to celebrate a fall tea time with my sweet daughter, Sarah.
To not recognize this day and the beauty He has crafted for my soul is to not worship and be grateful and to notice His masterpieces.
And so today, I take time to breathe in the beauty, that I may adequately turn my heart of thanksgiving to Him who took the time to make it for my comfort.
What for tea time?
Knobby Apple Cake or
Squirrel Nutkin Cake, as Joy renamed it!
2 cups sugar (I use the organic brown Turbanado, the small grind)
1/2 cup butter
1/2 cup oil
2 eggs
2 cups flour (1/2 cup extra for high altitude) (I use half freshly ground wheat, and sometimes a little oat and rice ground together and mixed together)
2 tsp. soda
1/2 tsp. cloves
1 tsp. cinnamon
1 tsp. nutmeg
1 tsp. salt
1 tsp vanilla
4 cups grated apples
1 cup chopped nuts (I add them to the top of those who want them.)Cream butter and sugar. Beat in the eggs and vanilla. Sift dry ingredients together and add into wet ingredients, mixing thoroughly. Fold in apples and nuts, bake in greased floured bundt pan for 40-45 minutes at 350.
Drizzle powered sugar glaze over cooled cake and serve.Glaze:
2 cups powdered sugar
dash salt
warm water to thin
2 t. melted butter
1/2 tsp. vanilla Mix glaze ingredients, add water as needed to thin, add more sugar if too thin. Drizzle over cake.Tastes best when warm or hot! A sprinkle of nuts on top with a drizzle of homemade caramel sauce is also delectable! Enjoy!
Part of our purpose as moms is to inspire our children.
"As mothers and fathers, it is so easy to get distracted by the details of our lives. We have so much to do! We must feed our children and take care of their health. We must oversee their education and their training to make sure they will be able to take care of themselves and live in a civilized society. We train them in righteousness so they may understand how God wants them to live. We try to relate to them in mature ways and help them learn to have healthy relationships.
Yet often, I think, we get lost in these mulitudinous tasks that rule our lives, and we lose sight of the underlying purpose behind all those tasks, which is to prepare our children to go into the world and make disciples for our Lord.
Each of our children has been given a specific personality and a particular set of circumstances that will give shape to God's purposes for his or her life. It is our privilege and responsibility as parents to help our children understand their particular fit in God's plan. This means pointing out special skills and talents. It also means helping children realize that God didn't give them such skills and talents just to use on themselves, but to glorify him and bring others to Him through the stewardship of their lives. In other words, we are to help them see themselves and their potential and then to inspire them for God's purposes:
Joel, you are so musical. Maybe you will write great music that will encourage others to worship God and want to know Him!"
Joy, you are so compassionate. I love the sweet cards you make! I can see the Lord using you to comfort and encourage many lonely or hurting people."
When our days are busy and so many demands on our time cry out for attention, it can be easy to start seeing our children as if they are projects to be perfected; always needing more correction, more training, and more and more work. After awhile, that sort of focus leads to resentment on both sides. Over many years of mothering, I've learned that reminding my children of the things they do well and encouraging them to bless someone else can do more to turn a negative attitude, a really bad day, or a hopeless cause completely around than the longest, most eloquent lecture I could have mustered.
Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "Our chief want is someone who would inspire us to be what we know we could be."
I think that's a pretty good job description for a mom, don't you?!
