Shaping A Heart For Him {Happy Valentine's Day!}

"As parents, we do not always express our love for our children according to biblical principles and patterns. Occasionally one of us will "lose it" and unload verbally on our kids. Like when mom gives work assignments three times that don't get done. Or when dad finds his tools left in the yard overnight in the rain.

Like most normal parents, we have our "bad discipline" days when our gentle, sympathetic, loving spirits seem to go into hiding. Fortunately, our children know it's a passing phase (although they do get very obedient very quickly on those days). We recover quickly because we know their hearts, and they know ours." -Educating The Wholehearted Child

Over the years, countless mothers have asked me what the big secret is. How did all four of my very different, unique children end up living passionately in their own arenas pursuing a life that glorifies God? If your children will grow up to go out into the world and live a life for the Lord, it must start in your home.

Home discipleship is shaping your child's heart to live for God. It is taking the sensitivity you have cultivated in their spirit to know God and experience His life and building on that to help them to know more about God's truth and what it truly means to live for Him. Discipleship, ultimately, is the process of beginning to walk on God's path of life and to follow Christ. Although it will involve studies and reading and perhaps even some curriculum, it is at its core a relational process, just as it was in Jesus' day.

The difference is, now, you as the parent play the role of Jesus. You are inviting your children to walk with you and with Jesus, who lives within you, so they can begin to follow, learn from, and become Christlike. Your children are not your disciples-you are both disciples of Jesus, learning together to follow him and be like him. And when that happens, you have cultivated home discipleship.

You will be able to shape the hearts of your children through relationship with them. Each and every day will not be perfect, sometimes on their side, sometimes on yours. However, when you are walking with your children and doing life together, being disciples of Jesus together, your family foundation will be one of love and hearts for Him.

His love, through you, in the midst of grace in the midst of mistakes, will fill in all the cracks.

Fill their hearts with discipleship so that they may desire a life with God. Give your children extra love today, and

Happy Valentine's Day!

Nathan Told Me He Didn't Believe in God (And What I Told Him)

http://youtu.be/GBZu8Y3NwD4

Today's article is from the heart of my very talented, almost married son, Nathan. He wrote and sang the vocals in the beautiful song above, his fiancee, Rachael, sang the harmony, and my other son, Joel, so wonderfully arranged it. Read Nathan's story below, and take the time to listen and share his song!

I waited with a worried heart and a furrowed brow for my parents to come and say goodnight. Usually it was a quick prayer and quick “love you goodnight!”- but tonight I had something to tell them that had been burning a hole in my heart.

I could feel knots in my ten year old stomach, while I unknowingly wrapped my fingers tighter and tighter around my sheets.

On the walls around me hung pictures and poster of heroes and great figures standing tall representing the strength a young man's heart longs for, but tonight I didn’t feel strong or brave, as yet another distressing wave of doubt came over me.

The door swung gently open and my parents entered ready to send me off to bed as they prepared to end their day. After a short prayer and a pat on the leg they prepared to leave when suddenly I said “stop, I need to tell you something”. 

Gently concerned, they turned back around and asked me what was on my mind. A bit of fear welled up within me mixed with a twinge of shame as I took a breath and let it come out “I don’t know if I believe in God." The words hung in the air and the silence was almost more than I could bare. Then I felt the gentle hand of my mother rest again on my leg as the worry left her face and a sleight smile came over her face, “That’s okay."

Astonished that my mother, the most godly woman I have ever known, so nonchalantly took in stride my doubt of God, I replied puzzled... “It is?”

“Of course” She said “Every true believer will have doubts and questions about God, that’s very normal, when I first met Jesus, I know I did. You are a great boy Nathan, and I have no doubt you’ll be a great man.” And with one more “Goodnight I love you”, my parents gently left the room taking the weight of the world I had been carrying, with them.

That night my parents gave me something amazing, through their allowance of my doubts they gave me the ability to know God on a greater scale than I could have ever known him while having a faux faith forced upon me.  

Whenever I would have doubts, having felt the freedom to communicate with my parents about them she would tell me “Don’t worry Nathan you remind me of the great biblical hero Jacob, who wrestled God”, “I do” I would ask wondering how? “Yes” she would say “And that’s a great thing, because wrestling is a full contact sport and when we wrestle with God we are in communion with him, which is ALWAYS a good thing."

The song above was written years after that night in my bedroom, miles away from my parents in a small apartment in Hollywood. I had been going through a time of doubt and struggle with God, not unlike the struggle I faced when I was ten. I wanted to put all my fears and doubts into a song but felt a pause thinking maybe, I shouldn’t doubt God and just pretended to be okay. But then suddenly I could again hear my mother's words echoing through the confines of my minds memories “Wrestling with God is a GOOD thing, wrestling is a full contact sport, and as long as we are in contact with God you have nothing to worry about."

So with a pure heart, I wrote an honest song to God that ultimately brought me even closer to my creator.

That night in my bedroom, my parents gave me a gift. They gave me the gift of allowing me to doubt, struggle and fight, because they knew that is who God had created me to be. And because they allowed me to wrestle with God, they by default allowed me to be in full contact with him.

I encourage you, wrestle with God, doubt, struggle and be brutally honest with Him, He can take it, and doesn’t mind at all- when you do this you just might find that engaging in the full contact sport with your creator will bring you closer to God than you ever might have thought.

If you would like to download Nathan's song on iTunes click here. If you would like to download Nathan's song on Amazon click here.

Are you raising warriors or refugees?

Nathan, a warrior for His kingdom, bringing light , beauty and innocence into the dark places  of Hollywood.

"Sally, how can I be sure that my children won't be tempted by all the evil in the world," a sweet mama asked me.

"You can't." I replied. Part of your job as a mom is not to hide them from the world and scare them about what is in the world, but to arm them with the purpose of becoming a warrior for God's kingdom in dark places, so that they will not be overcome or surprised by the challenges they will encounter as adults."

Warrior, running toward the battle to take ground for God's kingdom.

Refugee--running away from the battle and seeking to escape engaging in the fray.

My children's stories definitely stretched me--but God was with me and He was my protector and guide through each step of the journey.

"What, Nathan? You want to move to New York City and attend the film academy? You are only 19--it is a difficult place? You really want us to pray about this?!"

"I do not ask you to take them out of the world, but to keep them from the evil one." Jesus, about His disciples, in John 17: 15

And so send him, we did. And Joel and Sarah to Cambridge, Joel to Boston for school, Sarah to Oxford, and trusted them to God's call on their lives--and Joy to an out of state college.

Not too long ago, a friend whispered to me at a conference, "Sally, there are all sorts of women that I know who attend your conferences because they are encouraged, but they are criticizing you behind your back. They are asking the question, 'How did the Clarksons allow their son to move to Hollywood, such a wicked place,  if they have such high moral ideals?' They think you are living a compromise to your life as a Christian."

I am not surprised at statements like these. We get them all the time. I have always told my children that if you stand up to lead, you automatically become a target.

Yet, I also understand the concerns of these people who are criticizing us.

I have also been criticized for over-protecting my children. But the over-protection was for shaping their foundations when they were young and vulnerable. (keeping them innocent, giving them g-rated hero stories, giving them protection from peers whose values are worldly at a young age so they can develop their own foundations--before sending them out!) Keeping them loving what is good, true, honest.--And then as they begin to ask questions and grow and learn and show maturity--you take them with you in ministry, little by little, was the philosophy we followed.

I did not ask God to send my children into difficult, morally challenging arenas. But I did ask Him to help Clay and me build them into godly leaders who would take His light to a dark world. And, since they are adults and we released them into God's hands to follow what road He put on their heart, (with input from us all along the way), I spend a lot of time on my knees every day and ask for God to guide, intervene and protect my children.

Yet, I think at some point in the Christian life, regardless of  peers, our church's stand, our friend's opinions, blogs, loud voices giving pontificating statements, we must decide just who we think Jesus is and how His life and words should influence the way we live and the choices we make.  There are few radical Christians and yet,  He calls us to live radically--even if that means staying at home with your children to disciple them or serving Him in in the world in an unusual places--we must follow Him, not anyone else.

Jesus does not call us to a safe life--but to follow His life.

Jesus, the exact image of God, related to prostitutes and offered them a clean slate of forgiveness, and allowed them to touch Him and wash His feet.

Jesus, touched the infirm and contaminated--the lepers, the woman who was unclean, the blind, the sick.

Jesus looked out on the multitudes not with condemnation, but with compassion and told us to pray that God would send laborers into the harvest. He also sent His disciples into the world to redeem it.

Jesus did not exalt and affirm the Pharisees who had rules and laws for everything and stayed away from the "wicked" folk. Instead, he told the parable of the Good Samaritan, one of the "unacceptable" from a religious point of view, but the only one who was able to please God. He honored because he got involved,  because he lived in a compassionate way and gave of his life to save the beaten man, a victim of thieves, unlovely and in the dirt.

I think serving Jesus will, at some point, make all of us uncomfortable.

And so, I had to confront my own belief in what I thought was most Biblical in philosophy for raising children.

I wanted an Anne of Green Gables life that was safe, protected and always g-rated. But, that is not the world God into which He placed me.

So I had to consider, "What is your will for my children." He answered, "To follow Jesus to the cross, to be willing to give up their lives to redeem the world for His glory--to become a warrior for Christ's kingdom.

A warrior is one who sees the battle in his land, and is willing to sacrifice his life to protect those he loves, to save them from harm and to engage the enemy in battle. Battle is rough, costly, difficult and requires sacrifice for the sake of the people who are being warred against.

Now a refugee, on the other hand, is one who runs away from the battle, in order to protect himself or his loved ones. When there is no defense against the enemy, often, people are forced to flee. But in fleeing away from the battle, they leave no impact, no defense, for those left in the wake of the raging enemy army.

Often I see parents who raise their children to run away from the cultural battles and to stay far off from those who are lost and broken and who have scars and difficulties. They find it easy to criticize those who are engaged in bringing the light of Christ into the arena of darkness--this is the place in which our family receives criticism.

I will admit that the world can be a very fearful place to be. And I spend a whole lot of time in prayer for my young, idealistic warriors!

But, God has asked me, as a mom,  to live by faith, not to look to the limitations of my own life and this wicked world we live in, but to the God who tells us to overcome evil with good, to remain faithful, to endure.

So, as a mom, I had to ask, "Would He have me do anything less than send my own children, as God sent His own son, into the world to redeem dark places?"

And so when we read in the Psalms,

"Praise be to the LORD my Rock,who trains my hands for war,my fingers for battle.

He is my loving God and my fortress,my stronghold and my deliverer,my shield, in whom I take refuge,

who subdues peoples under me." Psalm 144: 1-2,

we would pray with our children.  "Lord, these are your children created by you with a personality and a purpose. Train our children for the spiritual warfare in which they will engage. Prepare them for the battles they will confront. Be their fortress, their stronghold, deliverer and shield. They are not ours to hold on to, but ours to prepare for your kingdom purposes."

Depending on what you decide, preparing one to run away from the battle or to engage in the battle, will require a very different parenting philosophy.

But as for the Clarksons, we will seek to engage in the battle, and rub shoulders with the lost, because we cannot do other than what our Lord and savior showed us to do--to go into the world to make disciples, to see the multitudes with compassion and to become workers in the Harvest field of the world.

Nathan has chosen to answer the call of God and engage the warrior story that was written on his heart. Recently, he has written a study with the 10 aspects of what it means to become a hero. You can find his book here (available in print or on Amazon).

Becoming A Wise Woman With Wise Words

"Gentle words are a tree of life; a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit."

"Mama, do you still love me when I make such stupid mistakes?" My sweet one, many years ago,  was curled up on the couch in an almost fetal position, regretting something she has done and condemning herself over and over again for not refraining from the foolish behavior.

"I love you if you had made 10,000 mistakes. I love you because you are mine. I love you even for the mistakes you will make the rest of your life. You are so precious to me, I can hardly refrain from kissing your sweet head a million times right now."

A tiny smile curled her lips. I stroked her hair and told her that God's love became more precious to me each day, because the older I got, the more I sinned, even when I wish I could be good, and the more it made me love Him for His gracious love.

A wise mama give words of life--practices planting seeds of love through the words she aims at the hearts of her children.

Our mother's mothers said it to them, our mothers told us, and we tell our children:

If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. While we have heard and said this many times, it is not only true, but biblical.

"Whoever guards his mouth preserves his life; he who opens wide his lips comes to ruin." -Proverbs 13:3

Excusing our offensive, unsolicited opinions with comments like "no offense" is still offensive, friends. Our culture has made it quite easy and comfortable for us to hide behind computer screens, iPhones, and iPads, offering out our every thought on blogs and social media with no immediate consequences and no tear-filled eyes staring back at us. What a different world we would live in if instead of viewing every thought that runs through our minds as something we are entitled to share, we took every thought captive out of obedience to Christ (2 Corinthians 10:5).

Are your words building the kingdom of God, being used as a tool and source of encouragement, and making someone's day? Or are your words causing pain, destruction, and breaking someone's day? Often times, people say "the truth hurts." As women in today's culture, we do have the power and influence to hurt others with our words. However, wise, godly women use their words to bless, to teach truth, to instruct, to encourage, to love, to support, and to nourish the broken.

An amazing tool that we have with the tongue is to speak truth that doesn't hurt. Truth that brings light, joy, and inspiration to those around us. In order for us to be able to teach our children the importance of the impact of our words, we must walk it out ourselves. One of the ways that we allow our frustrations, disappointments, and insecurities to manifest is through negative, cutting words. Through our gossip and breaking others down, we build this unhealthy habit that becomes a cycle. When we make someone else feel small, it makes us feel big for a moment. We live in a generation where gossip, rumors, and lie-filled tabloids are considered normal. Even worse-gossiping & cutting others down has turned into a “bonding experience” for many women. Proverbs 15:2 tells us: "The tongue of the wise makes knowledge appealing, but the mouth of a fool belches out foolishness."

We must teach our children that gossip is unacceptable, but before they will accept this value, you must ask yourself:How are you speaking to your children? What words are used in your home? It starts with you.

Proverbs 31 says, "When she speaks, she has something worthwhile to say, and she always says it kindly."

I encourage you to have Christlike, blessed conversation this week in your home, and outside your home. Remember that when you speak from a kind, gentle heart, your message is far more likely to be well received and accepted than when you speak out of anger and coldness.

Feel free to share the memory verse below:

To take your study further today, complete the application below in your journal. How do you speak to your children? With a gentle voice? Do you look them in the eye and honor them with your attention? Do you seek to give life when you speak your words? Do you seek to pass on the beauty and love of God with the ways you speak to your husband, children, friends?

Cooking In The Clarkson Home

{Today's article is from my almost-daughter-in-law, Rachael! Nathan and Rachael will be married in less than a month now!}

Getting away from busy Los Angeles where I live and visiting the beautiful Clarkson home in Colorado is always a refreshing escape that I so look forward to. Nathan and I often joke about there being some sort of magic there--as food is constantly just appearing before our eyes!

Living as an adult in Hollywood, it is such a treat to visit such a wonderful home...a place where the aroma of freshly baked cookies fills each room, where I wake up to Kelsey the golden retriever barking, where tea time is a daily necessity, and my soul is filled with laughter and great conversation.

The photo above is one of my favorite memories and moments in time.  Last summer while I was visiting the Clarksons, I was 90% excited and 10% nervous when Miss Sally asked me if I would like to make breakfast for the family in their home. Me? Make breakfast? In your home? Miss Sally's meals are so delicious, I swear they don't just go into your stomach but straight into your soul (I'm not exaggerating-just taste her homemade cinnamon rolls)! While I was absolutely honored, I felt I had a lot to live up to!

Cooking is one of my favorite things to do, and now this 22 year old girl who prepares meals in tiny Hollywood apartments had the opportunity to cook in a big, beautiful, home kitchen. Very quickly, my anxiety disappeared as I was overcome by joy. I also came to realize that Miss Sally and I have very similar cooking styles. We both share a love of whipping up healthy, hearty, home cooked meals. I often tell my fiance, Nathan, that cooking for others is truly one of my love languages. It brings me so much joy to prepare something delicious and beautiful for the people in my life.

Today, I am going to share one of my all-time favorite breakfast recipes with you. It is Clarkson family approved, and Nathan requests that I make this for him often. It has definitely become one of my classic dishes, as I usually make it along with cinnamon rolls for holidays such as Thanksgiving and Christmas. One of my favorite things to do is to find meals that are pleasing to the eye, scrumptious to the taste buds, filling for the tummy, but not time consuming. This recipe is not only delicious, but it cooks quickly and only requires a few ingredients!

Breakfast Cups

Ingredients: 12 eggs 12 thick slices of uncooked turkey bacon 1 cup of shredded sharp cheddar cheese Salt & pepper to taste

Instructions: -Preheat oven to 375 degrees. -Lightly grease a 12-cup cupcake tin. -Cut each slice of bacon in half. Each cupcake tin will have two halves of bacon crisscrossed into an X to hold the rest of your breakfast cup. Place your crisscrossed bacon into every cup. -Evenly distribute your shredded cheese on top of the bacon in each cup, sprinkling lightly. -Crack one egg into each cup. -Sprinkle with salt and pepper to taste. {Optional: if you do not like runny, over-easy eggs, simply swap the egg and the cheese by putting the cheese on TOP. This will make a fully cooked egg.} -Bake in the oven about 15-20 minutes, or until your eggs are cooked to your liking.

This is a super easy, fun recipe that is perfect for busy Saturday mornings when you just want to feed everyone in your home, if you have guests, holidays, or any occasion!

Nathan, my Clarkson connection, and I can't wait to start our history together on March 1! We would cherish your prayers for us as we seek to follow Him in our lives and through the story we live together!

***********************************************************************

I am so excited and honored to have the opportunity to speak this weekend at the Mom Heart conference in Irvine, CA and am really looking forward to meeting some of you! My passion is to inspire young women to create an identity based on who God says we are! I can't wait to share some of my Hollywood stories and what God has placed on my heart. I will also be sharing about my newest book, Identity Girls. 

Identity Girls is a 30 day devotional to teach each of us how to define ourselves as the young women we were so uniquely designed to be. This is not just a devotional for the insecure, for the hurting, for the flawed...but if it were, this would still be a devotional for each and every one of us. As women, we need to be encouraged, inspired, and reminded of who we were created by God to be...women of influence. Each day of Identity Girls has a notes section where you can journal your thoughts, jot down your new goals, and personalize your own prayers.

If there is a young woman in your life who is embarking on her own unique journey, be a source of encouragement in her life today. Surprise her with her very own copy of Identity Girls, and inspire her to fully understand who she was designed to be.

For more on Rachael, check out her blog for young women at:

www.rachaelleeclarkson.com

Click the "add to cart" button below to begin your journey.

XOXO, Rachael Lee {almost Clarkson}

God's Voice has Always Led me to pursue a different path-- The opposite direction from the World.

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I, I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference.

(On a hike this fall in the Austrian woods--2 roads diverging......and I took the one less traveled by, from experience.)

"But Peter and the apostles answered, "We must obey God rather than men." Acts 5:29

A cheap hotel room did not offer haven or beauty.Yet, it held me, a sacred sanctuary  as I shyly approached the throne of God amidst worn, shag carpet, a faded utilitarian  bedspread, holding my bowed head.  On my knees, at 22, I  had gone away for my first 24 hours alone with the Lord, I sincelerly poured my child-like heart  and gave Him all the rights to my life.

"I love you. Use me. Show me how to live for you and your kingdom--I come as a willing student and want to know you and your ways."

Philippians 3: 8- 11 became my innocent heart's cry, along with Paul: "More than that, I count all things to be loss in view of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord,  for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them but rubbish so that I may gain Christ, and may be found in Him, not having a righteousness of my own derived from the Law, but that which is through faith in Christ, the righteousness which comes from God on the basis of faith,  that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death."

This was a come to Jesus meeting between me and Him--understanding that knowing Him would become the goal of my life--and that I was giving all things into His hands--my life, goals, paths, relationships, expectations, ministry, hopes and dreams--they were placed into His hands and so began my life-long pursuit of Him--the treasure of my life. I am not super-spiritual type,  but more of a Peter, passionate and committed, often, just quite flawed in my perceptions and insights .

Yet, understanding this always gave me a place to go--that my lifetime goal was to know Him and love Him. Through the years, I would find mystery: "I don't know why this is happening." or "I don't feel qualified to handle this, God." But--I gave my life into your hands and so I will follow you where you lead and seek to understand Jesus more from every circumstance, at every turn in my road where you lead. And please know I long to glorify you."--this has made all the difference in my life. Every step became a point of looking to learn, to know, to worship.

 As a young, naive, in-experienced woman, I had no concept of what this commitment would cost me or where it would lead me. The trials and battle I would face, would at times totally overwhelm me, as I had not trained to be a warrior for righteousness, and I did not know how much it would cost. And yet, my life was owned by Him, so I followed and obeyed and sought His ways, because a commitment between me and Jesus had been made.

God whispered, "Raise the children I gave you for my glory. Disciple them to go back into the world for my kingdom." And so through this knowledge, I home-schooled so I could spend all of my time with them, to cultivate their hearts, minds, manners and souls for His glory and to be a good steward of the lives He entrusted to me. It was what He called Clay and me to do, against all the advice of those in our circles.

Take a risk, have one more child. Even in the midst of 3 miscarriages, one in which I almost died, I had my 4th child at age 42, against the voices of those who thought this extreme--and who meant well, but they had not heard God speak to me in my quiet time. Children are a blessing, the fruit of the womb is a reward, and so at early mid-life, he blessed me with one more little girl, who has brought me so much Joy--pun intended.

God led us to disciple, through grace, a foundation of love and building character. Love is the foundation of your influence, he whispered.

"You aren't spanking enough," the voices whispered. You will ruin your children.

You aren't being the parent who stands on top of your children. Bowing your knee to serve them will give them a rebellious heart and they will get away manipulate you and become rebellious."

But Jesus' example was to love sacrificially and to give up his time in heaven to live, love, teach and serve his own disciples--and so we followed His ways.

And then, God led us to send our children back into the world to bring His kingdom work in very secular places, where the world was dark. New York City Film Academy; Berklee school of music in Boston, Oxford, Cambridge, Hollywood. College at 17, over 1000 miles away from home.

"Your children are going to fall in such dark, lost cultures. I can't believe you would let them go there without your supervision."

The voices kept haunting us through all of our years. And yet, we followed Jesus--he had said, "Father, I do not pray that you take them out of the world, but keep them from the evil one." And so we served them, instructed them, trained them, loved them with our whole heart and passed on a personal vision from our own lives to them as best we could, that God had especially chosen them to bring His light to the world-that they were designed to live a story of significance.

But along the way, Jesus whispered, "The world is a hard place--Have fun, and learn to memorialize joyful moments and  life. Honor the beauty and pleasure of  my world. Teach your children to dance and celebrate life--because I made them a beautiful world to experience, so they would know more of my character and grace for them. Don't live by someone else's law--live as a child, secure in her Father's love."

We started dinner groups, took trips international and at home, read and discussed every day, all the time, had our children serve by our side--because that is what Jesus did--He was "with" His disciples every day and taught them to serve alongside Him. And so we lived as a family with freedom, music, feasting and learned to be ourselves, in spite of the criticism or whispers of others who were afraid to live in His pleasure.

Because Jesus celebrated and made new wine when He ushered in His coming with a wedding feast--a joyful party. And He promised to come back and take us to a new feast in heaven. We had to follow the feasting, artist God, and learned to live life well.

And when we were criticized and pushed away from some circles of those who followed harsher laws than we had been led to obey, we forgave, practiced love, and extended grace--because, Jesus, while being reviled, did not revile in return, but kept trusting Himself to God who judges righteously. (I Peter 2: 23) And so we practiced and practiced and practiced forgiveness--mainly to other "Christians" who were the ones more difficult for us in our lives.

And when we were in darkest of dark times, we kept still and waited. Jesus said, "Peace I leave with you. In this world you have tribulation, but I have overcome the world. Be still and know that I am God." And he said in Psalm 139, that "even darkness was not dark to Him"--so we trusted through our tears, that He could see even if we couldn't. He told us to trust Him, so we practiced.

And we loved wildly, deeply, generously through all of our mistakes, because Jesus said that all the laws and prophets could be summed up by "Loving God with all our heart, and loving our neighbor as ourselves."

And so like Peter, we remembered that "love covered a multitude of sins." And we lived for His kingdom--the one that will come, not the one that is here--because Jesus said, "Seek first the Kingdom of God."

And now, as we look back on our lives, we are so very grateful that His voice led us--because the fruit of our life in following Him has been so very sweet. He is good, He is kind, He is loving and He has guided us all these years. His voice can be trusted. His ways are sure--and in the end, all of us are more suited for heaven, because of His sanctifying hand, where we will be with Him forever at the marriage feast of the Lamb and us, His bride..

Knowing Jesus and following Him--the best and most blessed wisdom, and worship, we ever could have learned.

(A sunset that Jesus painted in the sky for Joy and me just, recently as we walked together on the beach in California,

for our pleasure and all who would see His fingerprints.......)

*****************************************************************************************************

Watch the video below to hear of a new book about  living an idealistic life., written by my friend, Tsh Oxenrieder.

Today, I am giving 3 away 3 copies of Tsh's new book!

And, because it also calls mamas to set up their ideals, to win their children, I am giving 3 copies of 10 Gifts!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Wisdom--a civilizer of the whole world--Your calling, destiny and role!

When God created the world, painted pinks and blues in sunsets, designed the forests, the peacocks and zebras, Wisdom, always personified as a woman in Proverbs, was delighting, dancing, crafting at his side and standing as a partner in bringing beauty into the world. Join me for a short video about your design and inheritance as a woman who brings life, beauty, goodness, truth, and inspiration to a world that is longing to learn about all that is excellent.

My friends, as I was recording, my computer died. I hope you will enjoy this video--be inspired and live into your beautiful design in your own arena.

The end of the video should be, "Because from the beginning, you were created by God to bring all that is good, true and beautiful into the world through your life, your work and your love. God said this about Wisdom, the woman crafted to exhibit wisdom throughout the world:

“The Lord formed me from the beginning, before he created anything else. 23 I was appointed in ages past, at the very first, before the earth began. 24 I was born before the oceans were created, before the springs bubbled forth their waters. 25 Before the mountains were formed, before the hills, I was born— 26 before he had made the earth and fields and the first handfuls of soil. 27 I was there when he established the heavens, when he drew the horizon on the oceans. 28 I was there when he set the clouds above, when he established springs deep in the earth. 29 I was there when he set the limits of the seas, so they would not spread beyond their boundaries. And when he marked off the earth’s foundations, 30     I was the architect at his side. I was his constant delight, rejoicing always in his presence. 31 And how happy I was with the world he created; how I rejoiced.

Proverbs 8: 22-31

In what ways is God sending you into your world to bring His wisdom, His own excellencies to the people He has placed in your life? What are your favorite ways to show wisdom and to bring light from your feminine design?

Innocence: Oh Bother (Why Bother For Your Children)

Wikimedia Commons

From my brilliant husband, Clay Clarkson

Winnie-the-Pooh died today. Or, rather, his father died today. Not his real father mind you. And not this day, but on this day. Oh dear. I mean, on another day that is the same as this day. A different kind of same day. I mean. Oh bother.

A. A. Milne, the literary father of Winnie-the-Pooh, died 58 years ago on this day, January 31, 1956. He left behind a legacy of childhood innocence that has delighted generations of children, and adults, in many languages and cultures around the world. Thankfully, his literary progeny live on. You might have missed it, but January 18 was Winnie-the-Pooh Day in honor of Milne’s 1882 birthday.

I think it is safe to say that no other literary character in the past century is as deeply ingrained in our collective cultural psyche as the honey-loving bear of little brain. Perhaps it is because Pooh is a children’s storybook creation mined from the Milne family’s real life. Winnie-the-Pooh was the young Christopher Robin Milne’s real stuffed bear, just as his other animal friends—Piglet, Tigger, Eyore, and Kanga—were the boy’s stuffed playmates. And The Hundred Acre Wood was a real place in the Ashdown Forest area of Sussex, England, where the Milne family spent many happy years. Perhaps being made from the real made the pretend Pooh all the more real.

“The hardest part is what to leave behind… It’s time to let go.”

Winnie-the-Pooh

This post is not a history of Pooh, but rather a historical parable of sorts about innocence—its reality, its endurance, its loss. You see, on the same day that A. A. Milne died in England, a future generation was also being birthed there. As Mr. Milne passed quietly out of this world on that January 31, John Lydon came screaming into it. And no matter how innocent the baby boy might have been then, twenty years later that unspoiled infant would become Johnny Rotten, lead singer for the Sex Pistols. His groundbreaking British group would introduce the world to Punk Rock music, a thoroughly un-innocent musical form of screaming and swearing in musical rage against all things good. The Rock and Roll generation that began three days before Milne died, when Elvis Presley released his first hit song “Heartbreak Hotel,” would go on through baby Lydon born three days later to thoroughly reject innocence. And culture has never been quite the same.

Do you see the parable in those details of history? On January 31, 1956, the creator of perhaps the most enduring literary expression of cultural innocence died, and that same day the creator of perhaps the most influential musical expression of cultural un-innocence was born. It was a cosmic convergence of clashing cultures, a sentient snapshot of the inevitable ebbing and flowing of innocence. And here’s some irony to chew on along with it. In 2002, the London BBC ran a TV poll to determine who the British people thought were the “100 Greatest Britons” of all times. A. A. Milne didn’t even make the list. But John Lydon, aka Johnny Rotten, did. He came in at number 87. Oh stuff and bother.

“I used to believe in forever, but forever is too good to be true.”

Winnie-the-Pooh

It’s no big secret that innocence, especially for children, has taken a beating in the past half century.

Culture tends to appreciate innocence for a time, but soon tires of it, kicks it to the side of the road, and runs off in pursuit of other ever-mutating expressions of un-innocence. Like an addict always in need of a stronger fix, culture rarely lingers long in the presence of purity. But innocence never goes away. It endures. It must endure.

Here’s my point (yes, I have one). Innocence is the natural state of a child’s heart.

Not theological innocence, but rather an ideological innocence that simply acknowledges that the innocent choice is natural, good, and the most desirable. I believe all children, if unspoiled by culture and given the opportunity, will naturally desire and choose the sweeter offerings of cultural fruit—they will choose innocence and be nourished by its pure nectar. However, in the absence of truly innocent choices, a child will tend to choose the least un-innocent of whatever is offered, no matter how far the choices veer from innocence. And in that choosing an appetite for un-innocence can slowly and inevitably be fed and strengthened. Until there is no appetite for innocence. It happens in culture; it happens in children.

For the rest of the story and a great innocent book list, go to: http://forthefamily.org/

*******************************************************************************

Our children were raised on Winnie the Pooh--great read-alouds for children and adults. Also, innocent, tickles the funny bone, and has great language.

What are your favorites for innocent reading aloud as a family? (Sarah will be speaking about this at the next two Mom Heart conferences and more about choosing the right stories for feeding your children's hearts.)

And did you know this about Winnie the Pooh: 

Postscript of Useless but Interesting Historical Details:

If you think of Pooh as just a nice little children’s story that Disney made famous, let me add some perspective. Milne released Winnie-the-Pooh, his first collection of Pooh stories, in 1926, followed by The House at Pooh Corner in 1928. In 1930, media mogul Stephen Slesinger licensed Winnie-the-Pooh, giving birth to the modern licensing industry.

Less than two years later, in the depths of the Great Depression, Pooh was a $50-Million dollar industry ($650-Million in 2014 dollars). Walt Disney, who founded Walt Disney Studio the same year as Milne’s first Pooh book, was still getting his cartoon acts together, and wouldn’t buy the Pooh licenses until 1961, after the death of Slesinger in 1953 and Milne three years later. Because Milne’s books were published after 1923, the first one will not enter the Public Domain until 2026, and the Disney derivative works not for many decades after that. Pooh is here to stay.

A Podcast Just to Encourage you! How to raise great boys! (and it works for girls, too!)

"Sally, how did you live through the years of raising two boys and all of their issues, attitudes, loudness, did I say, "attitudes" and capture their hearts for a God in the midst?"

A group of moms cornered me last weekend at my Colorado conference and said they wanted to talk to me and ask me 5 questions they had all agreed were their biggest issues! 

How timely for me since I have just been recording a podcast about that very issue.

What a privilege to be able to visit with a sweet friend of mine, Brooke McGlothlin, one of the co-founders of themobsociety.com/, a great blog for moms of boys. She has written a new book about praying for boys, that I actually think would be great for all moms! She interviewed me about many of my various thoughts about raising great kids, and I thought you might enjoy listening to our discussion. Hope it encourages you.

[audio mp3="http://www.prayingforboys.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/sallyclarkson-on-2013-12-12-at-10.06.mp3"][/audio]  

You can find her book, here!

You will be inspired!

Where Does Wisdom Come From? {And learning to crave it!} Mentoring Monday

{My sweet boys, so many years ago, with their pal Luke. Joel is on the left, Nathan on the right. Aren't they the cutest?}

"Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise." Philippians 4:8

"Mama, P L E A S E don't make me eat brown rice one more time!"

Chicken and brown rice--Clay's favorite--wouldn't you know!  I will never forget how this simple dish was the one thing my younger son (now 25), Nathan, really disliked!  In our home, my children knew that they were to eat their dinner, try new things, and have an appreciation for what was prepared for them. While Nathan didn't always want to eat his chicken and brown rice, I would remind him the importance of building an appetite for what is good. It is now one of Nathan's favorite meals- and he asks for it when he comes home!

If this sounds familiar to you at all, it's not just because of children who are picky eaters. In our own lives as mothers, we cannot crave what we have never tasted and something that we have not experienced first hand.

However, even as our bodies are made to eat nutritious, healthy food, so our souls are crafted, pre-wired to depend on God and to follow His wisdom--in order to be strong and healthy.  We are pre-wired for all that is good, and that He has prepared us to enjoy.

Even as many have developed an appetite for fast-food which is totally unhealthy, so we are a culture that has often cultivated an appetite for those things that are shallow, entertaining, material, and give us permission to do whatever "feels good," but in the end may destroy our lives. (Didn't Paul say that in the end times, people who gather teachers around them to tickle their ears?)

After the Mom Heart Conference in Colorado this weekend, I have heard many stories of women who said they have never heard Biblical wisdom before, and how they wish they could take back mistakes they have made which has created havoc in their lives, because they just didn't know how scripture could guide their lives in every area of life.

The first sin, (Adam and Eve turning away from God's wisdom, and looking to fulfill their own needs), is the result of death to the spirit of God in their lives. The curse threw mankind into the throes of coming up with our own logic, wisdom that is corrupted by world values. Voices of every kind fill the Christian and secular world that lead us away from God's wisdom and substitute for what is right for what sounds right according to man's opinion.

The beginning of wisdom is God---quieting ourselves, learning His values and ways, understanding His will for us. Only as we return to God's ways and provision, can we expect God's favor and blessings on our lives.

Psalm 34:8 says:

"Taste and see that the Lord is good."

Perhaps you don't feel you have experienced this goodness first hand, or maybe you don't see or even understand what it means to  value of living in wisdom. The only way you can build your appetite is to understand, study, think, read, and taste it for yourself.

If you are what you eat, so to speak, what are you tasting today as your own food for thought? Whose wisdom have you depended upon?

Blogs? Facebook? Texting?

Those who have opinions and spread them across the web, but perhaps are too young and inexperienced to have the experience and proven life to back up their wisdom? Rather than depending upon man and the worlds' values, God wants us to understand Him and His ways as the true source of wisdom.

It is possible to create a new palate and build an appetite for wisdom, but this will require your spiritual and intellectual discipline--and obedience, so that you can have an appetite for what is good, true, honest, just, pure and lovely--the wisdom from above!

"So be careful how you live. Don't live like fools, but like those who are wise. Make the most of your time in these evil days. Don't act thoughtlessly, but understand what the Lord wants you to do." Ephesians 5:15-17

The word understand is key. How will you be able to live a life of wisdom and do what God wants you to do if you do not understand how to do so? Training your heart, mind, and soul to become a woman who is committed to the ways of wisdom means understanding where it comes from and how you can apply this to your own personal journey.

Wisdom comes from God.  "For the Lord grants wisdom! From His mouth come knowledge and understanding." -Proverbs 2:6 Often times in the business of motherhood, we make rash decisions and become overwhelmed before even thinking to turn to our Lord, the almighty one. Prioritize prayer and conversation with God; seek His ways, His truth, and His wisdom daily.

Wisdom comes from His word.  "Your word is a lamp to guide my feet and a light for my path." -Psalm 119:105 Life without God's word is like fumbling around in the dark. You can't possibly see or understand what God has called you to do if you are not tasting His living word, and prioritizing quiet time with your bible. His word is filled with the wisdom that will guide us through every circumstance.

Wisdom should come from parents and the home (this means your home!). "By wisdom a house is built, and by understanding it is established; by knowledge the rooms are filled with all precious and pleasant riches." -Proverbs 24:3 God values parents and the home very deeply. It is through your own study of wisdom, your own walk with God, and your subduing of your domain that your children's lives will be poured into and filled with wisdom as well.Wisdom is lived or not lived in every moment of your life in each day--the way you relate, work, teach, worship, the attitudes you have, the wisdom you share, the way you live with integrity--all of these define the wisdom you pass on to your children and the Jesus others see or don't see through your life.

His wisdom should be alive--palpable--causing others to want to know Him, because of the excellent ways that we live.

Wisdom comes from wise council. "Whoever walks with the wise will become wise." -Proverbs 13:20 Who are your counselors? Whose opinion do you care most about? Who do you spend the most time pleasing? (All of us have our favorite ways of escaping real life--it can be a hobby, romance novels, television, shopping, or the internet. If you do not have time for a quiet time, but have time for blogs and facebook, and the other escapes that keep you from dealing with real life--then you are not truly serious about seeking God as your source of wisdom.)

But having a real live person to talk to, one who has invested their lives in living close to God, is the person you want to meet with as often as possible. I have a friend that I know will always point me to wisdom because she is older than me and she has experience in areas I am just now engaging.

Perhaps you need help or companionship. Find someone to be accountable to--start a small group or time with a friend to study a book together.

Surrounding ourselves with wise, godly women will inspire and encourage us to become wise, godly women. A godly woman should be someone who has had integrity through out a life-time--has practiced righteous living, has raised godly kids, has stayed morally pure and devoted to her marriage or as a single mom, has stayed committed to Biblical ideals. Look for someone who draws admiration from you--not to some one who is just clever or opinionated but has not lived long enough to show forth the fruit of a life well-lived.

Unfortunately, we have put away the older, wiser, more experienced of our lives and replaced them with the technologically savy, flashy and web-wise authorities. And so often, we look to authorities who give us permission to live however we want instead of looking to God.

All wisdom must start with God. But we must practice learning to hear His voice in order to begin storing up wisdom in our soul which will lead us to maturity.

Recently, I was so thankful for the opportunity to get away for a little while to a health retreat to allow my body to heal and rejuvenate, after many run-ins with asthma, infections, 8 skin cancers, exhaustion, and sickness. Never in my life have I sipped on so many green things, and while it may not sound like the kind of "comfort food" we are used to, that is simply because we have not trained our bodies to have an appetite for this kind of goodness. After green drink upon green drink, my ears finally unclogged, I felt cleansed, and had more energy than before.

As mothers, wives, and women of God, we must train our hearts, minds, and souls to value wisdom and crave what is good.

Much like my weak body that was in need of cleansing, our culture and own human nature will often times infect and drain us, and we can combat this soul-exhaustion with wisdom. I hope that you are encouraged to understand wisdom and create your new palate today.

For Further Study: 1. Philippians 4:8

"Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise."

What do you find yourself investing the majority of your time in (thought life, invested energy, invested time)? Do you tend to dwell more on negativity/what needs to be done rather than what is lovely and excellent? How can you fill your life and home with more excellence this week? Write down a plan for your week and make it a great one!

2. Psalm 34:8

"Taste and see that the Lord is good."

Are you spending enough time with God (in prayer and in His word) to experience the goodness of His wisdom? Do you even recognize His wisdom? How can you plan to prioritize this in your schedule?

3. Proverbs 19:20

"Listen to advice and accept instruction, that you may gain wisdom in the future."

Are you surrounding yourself with wise council? Even if you are, are you humbling yourself and accepting help and instruction in the areas of your life where you truly need wisdom?

Think and pray about how you can grow your appetite for wisdom, and ask God to reveal the areas you need growth and help you flourish as a woman of wisdom.