The Chosen With Dallas Jenkins

Click here to listen to today’s new podcast episode with Dallas Jenkins, creator of The Chosen.

Have you ever wished you could bring the personal love of Christ before your children in such a way that their hearts will be shaped by Him? Longed to make His stories real, His words memorable in a way they will remember their whole lives? I’m so excited to tell you about a wonderful resource that has accomplished just that for our family.

As I look back on the lives of my children, it was a visual, real life experience that has lived in their memories since they were little. Stage lights shined brightly and focussed on Sarah, 9, and Joel, 7, as they entered into their roles of Lisa and Billy each Friday and Saturday night for three years. They played grandchildren as their grandfather told them the stories of Christ in The Promis for 2 1/2 hours on a large professional stage each evening to thousands of people in the audience. Nathan entered the stage numerous times on cue when children were called upon to be in a scene in the live and narrative of Jesus. Clay and I and even baby Joy participated and all of us were deeply impacted by participating hundreds of times, entering into the reality of the words and life of Christ as seen through the gospels. These words of Christ, enacted night after night, became a reality in their hearts.

There is something very special about engaging in visual reality of the New Testament stories. No longer just words on a page, but the characters in the story become more real, live in a context of life and have an affect on our lives.

That is why I am so very excited to talk about the new series, The Chosen, today on my podcast with the Dallas Jenkins. Dallas Jenkins is an American film and television director, writer and film producer. He is best known as the creator, director and co-writer of The Chosen, the first multi-season series about the life of Christ, and the most successful media crowd-fund of all time. His career is focused on faith-based media.

Last spring, in the fullness of Covid restrictions keeping us at home, our family began to watch this amazing series. All of us were deeply touched by the heart-felt stories of the people living out the gospels and we became engaged in the beauty and excellence of the quality of the productions.

Millions of people all over the world have been brought closer to Christ through this transforming story so beautifully presented in full color through episodes that draw us into the intimacy of the stories Jesus lived. I hope you will watch it with your family.

You can find out all about it HERE @ https://watch.angelstudios.com/thechosen. Watch it, support it, tell others about it. And be sure to listen to the podcast with him.

FOR MORE

  • Subscribe to this podcast on iTunes, Stitcher, or your favorite podcast app.

  • Leave an iTunes Review These are so important as they help our podcast reach more women with messages of encouragement.

  • Follow on Facebook and Instagram for the latest news and updates.

  • Share with others. My prayer is that this podcast brings encouragement to women and families, and I would be honored for you to tell others about it.

  • Join my friends and me in membership at Life with Sally, a place for me to share more teaching from the Bible and messages on education, motherhood, discipleship, and more!

0 Likes


This Beautiful Truth With Sarah Clarkson

B5DB2884-1B37-4B50-907C-DCEEDA3B46F3_1_201_a.jpeg

Click here to play today’s new podcast episode.

Every parent dreads the day when their children will say, “Mom, I have been having some doubts about God.” Yet, all of my adult children said this to me at one time or another. As I look back, I think it is a sort of right of passage. How can our children own their faith unless they tackle the hard problems we see in culture.

Sarah, my first child, deeply pondered the question, “How can there be so much evil, pain and suffering in the world even though God says He is light, beauty, goodness? How do the two co-exist? How can one have hope amidst dark and devastating times?”

Of course, these are questions many have asked throughout history. And yet, as I look back, all of my children’s doubts and wrestling with God led them to a stronger, surer faith.

When Sarah first came to me, I said, “God loves you so much. He is not threatened by your doubts. He wants you to know and. understand Him deeply. He has answers to your doubts. But I will believe for you and be your friend.

But then, Sarah’s doubt turned into a deep understanding about God’s love and goodness that it became a book. It is wonderful, inspiring, and filled with personal stories as well as deep theology.

Beauty has been an theme that Sarah found through her journey towards a stronger, more vibrant faith in God. Her story includes personal stories about some of her most difficult questions in life as well as a foundational faith she found in God as she searched for answers to her souls deepest struggles.

Here is a summary.

We live in a broken world. Amid the daily realities of sickness and isolation, disappointment and pain, it can be profoundly difficult to grasp the real goodness of God. But this is where God breaks into our darkness with beauty. In the wonder of creation, in art or film, story or song, in the kindness of his people and the good they create, God breaks into our pain in a tangible way, teaching us to trust his kindness and hope for his healing. Beauty is a voice singing into our suffering, beckoning us toward restoration.

In This Beautiful Truth, Sarah Clarkson shares her own encounters with beauty in the midst of her decade-long struggle with mental illness, depression, and doubt. In a voice both vulnerable and reflective, she paints a compelling picture of the God who reaches out to us in a real and powerful way through the 'taste and see' goodness of what he has made and what he continues to create amid our darkness. 'To recognize and trust God's gift in pain,' she writes, 'empowers us to create and love as powerful witnesses to God's healing love in a hopeless world.'

If you want to renew your capacity to recognize and encounter God's beauty in your life, this hope-filled book will show you the way.

Because I think this book will be so helpful and relevant to many of you, I am going to give away 5 copies. Please leave a comment here or on Facebook or Instagram and tag a friend. I will draw winners by Friday.

Purchase your own copy and read it with a friend!

Books Referenced in this Podcast:

FOR MORE

  • Subscribe to this podcast on iTunes, Stitcher, or your favorite podcast app.

  • Leave an iTunes Review These are so important as they help our podcast reach more women with messages of encouragement.

  • Follow on Facebook and Instagram for the latest news and updates.

  • Share with others. My prayer is that this podcast brings encouragement to women and families, and I would be honored for you to tell others about it.

  • Join my friends and me in membership at Life with Sally, a place for me to share more teaching from the Bible and messages on education, motherhood, discipleship, and more!

Helping Our Children Learn to Keep Their Heads

0C0171FB-4218-4CCB-910E-EF708D49CC72.jpeg

"If you can keep your head, when all about you

are losing theirs and blaming it on you.

If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,

but make allowance for their doubting, too … "

This poem, IF, by Rudyard Kipling, of which I have just quoted a little tiny bit, is one that I made all of my children memorize--and we reviewed it over and over and over again.

Right is always right even if no one is doing it, wrong is always wrong even if everyone is doing it.

We are called to have a different character, a constant one, one that reflects the very image of Jesus, and yet, in this crazy world, there are many irrational, unloving, critical, exhausted, weary, discouraged, immature, mean-spirited, untrained people wandering around. How I have been embarrassed by supposed Christians, even in the past couple of weeks!

I have seen lately, in the lives of my children and friends, some being overcome by very difficult situations and people who unwillingly become a tool in the hand of Satan to discourage and destroy the faith, hearts, and well-being of others.

And yet, for those of us who have lived long enough, we know that this is part of the common "tribulation" and stress Jesus was referring to when He said, "In this world, you will have tribulation, but take courage, I have overcome the world."

And so, if we can keep our heads, knowing that love covers a multitude of sins, continuing to live in grace, and knowing that we and everyone else we will ever know will make mistakes on a regular basis; if we keep living out the liberating grace of the freedom and blessing we find in the abiding love of Jesus, then we can always have peace and the ability to keep giving life to others, just as He did.

Overcoming evil with good, loving beyond measure, forgiving and being a peacemaker, living with practiced faith, again and again and again—this is where we become more like Him, our very dear Savior, and it is here we become true warriors who redeem.

And so, I highly commend this entire poem, to plant into your brain and those of your children, so that you may have grace in your soul for facing this world and conquering the challenges that come your way.

Words have such power to bring life and inspiration and power--I just love words!

(and thank you, Rudyard, for penning this poem for my own well-being and for that of my children!)

Loving God with Wholehearted Devotion-Our 24 Family Ways #1

Inside Notre Dame Cathedral before the fire

Inside Notre Dame Cathedral before the fire

"We love and obey our Lord, Jesus Christ, with wholehearted devotion."

Memory verse: "And He said to them, ‘You shall love the Lord your God with all of your heart and with all of your soul and with all of your mind.' This is the great and foremost commandment." Matt. 22:37-38

Rainbow light shone through a multi-colored stain glass window which looked like it was a passage to heaven. Our normally wiggly, chattery clan became silent as they walked into the lovely chapel and heard the quiet music wafting up to the very rafters where the light was shining through. Oddly enough, the beauty, formality, and music hushed them and they sat mostly reverently through the hour-long service.

"Mama, you felt like you had to be quiet 'cause everything was so special, pretty, and respectful," piped one of my little ones, when asked what they thought of the new church we visited. This was the first time our family had ever attended such a formal service together, and it was enlightening to see what effect the sacred place of exquisite design and beauty had on the attitudes of my children.

Almost every time I read a story about someone who saw the glory of God, the effect of His blinding splendor was that they bowed down in fear, in reverence, hiding their eyes from the glory of God. The starting point for any real training must be reverence, respect, and proper awe of God, Himself.

With just one glance at the state of our world today, it’s clear that we’ve forgotten how to love — instead, we offer each other judgement, blame, and harsh words. It might sound simple, but the vast majority of our issues today stem from a lack of understanding of the importance of love, grace, and honor—giving worth that is due to God and those made in His image.

Preparing to become mature at loving God or preparing my children to become adults who knew how to love started with teaching them God’s most important commandment: to love Him with all their hearts, souls, and minds.

FOR MORE

  • Subscribe to this podcast on iTunes, Stitcher, or your favorite podcast app.

  • Leave an iTunes Review These are so important as they help our podcast reach more women with messages of encouragement.

  • Follow on Facebook and Instagram for the latest news and updates.

  • Share with others. My prayer is that this podcast brings encouragement to women and families, and I would be honored for you to tell others about it.

  • Join my friends and me in membership at Life with Sally, a place for me to share more teaching from the Bible and messages on education, motherhood, discipleship, and more!

The Greatest of These is Love & Podcast

tempImage3rmyFJ.gif

Click here to play today’s new podcast episode.

As I walk with my sweet granddaughter, Lilian, through the parks, we walk hand in hand. I take time to play and listen to her stories or discoveries, and make every effort to fill her deepest heart with a sense that she is beloved to her Queenie, the grandmother name my children assigned to me (from a favorite series.). As I am with her, a memory and longing often arises from my own childhood, where I remember longing for love and intentional attention..

Cartoon suitcase in hand, stuffed with my pajamas, a favorite teddy and small items I considered essential as a little girl, I marched into our den and announced loudly that I was running away from home to find a place where someone would play with me and be my friend. Oddly, I can still feel what I felt those many years ago, (or perhaps it has expanded in my memory!

I know my mother was a committed mama in her own way and at a different time in history, but I always had a longing to share my heart more, to be understood, to know that I was ok as I was, even if I did not change.

A deep hunger for attention, to have the eyes and focus of someone had been mounting deep in my heart for some time. Longing for deep love and affection,, for someone to talk to, someone to notice, a person who liked me, someone to make me feel seen was a feeling that lay underneath my little girl heart for as many years as I can remember. That longing was even what eventually led me to search for God when I was 18.

My mother & father sat reading their newspapers, (perhaps the last generation’s iPhones) and my older brothers were building some elaborate structure out of toys, ignoring my little stomping foot. I had supposed I would make a dramatic impact on them, but no one paid attention to me. My mother eventually, casually got up from her chair and murmured, “Do you want a snack to eat?” And my expectations of stirring up attention, sympathy, died on the spot, but the memory lasted a lifetime as a deep longing that no one understood.

My mother was from a different time in history and I know that she invested in my life the way she knew how to do. Yet, there was a deep desire, still, to have an assurance of her love in my little-girl heart.

We are all a bundle of couplex emotions and unique personalities. And yet, all of us were pre-wired with a longing to be loved, understood, appreciated, intimate with others who know us and our inner most secrets and share our dreams and our burdens. We hunger deeply for community and to have a place to “belong” is a part of our DNA from the design of God Himself.

Unfortunately, along the way, we stuff our need for such love, become busy or preoccupied and learn to be “unemotional” and unexpressive as we walk through our days.

When babies fail to receive the attention, physical affection and love they were prewired to receive, they soon fail to thrive and often die. If it was a need for infants to be loved in such a way, it is still a deep need of adults. It is a part of being human. Yet in the swirl of busyness, crowds of people, we can placate, cover over, rush beyond this deep down God-given desire, but often the scars of being ignored or neglected are still deep inside where few can see, and we set up barriers or walls that keep us from getting hurt.

I chose for my first word of this project “love” as the attribute we most need to embrace and cultivate. Though it may seem obvious that as those who would express God’s nature in our world, love is the most profoundly important concept, it is especially meaningful as as mothers, as our love lays the groundwork for emotional health and strength the rest of their lives. Love is also the foundation upon which our children build their view of God.

Hundreds of times, love is mentioned in the Bible. It is the pinnacle of the greatest commandments,
Jesus said it summed up all of the essence of the Law given through Moses and covered all of the issues of the prophets: do not have love, that we are to Love God and love our neighbor. (Matthew 22: 37-39)

If we live breathing the very depth of God’s love for ourselves every day, we come to understand that God’s love is essential to our understanding of Him, His heart for us, what drove Him to the cross, what He longs to share with us every day. Love is the essence of God’s very character. The more we understand it and express it, the more like Him we will be.

God’s love is called Agape. It is a greek word in the New Testament, considered the love of God for humans. In Scripture, the transcendent agape love is the highest form of love, from a father to His children.

Join me in my podcast today as I elaborate on many verses that speak about God’s unconditional and steadfast love as a model for what we are to grow into..

More Resources:

FOR MORE

  • Subscribe to this podcast on iTunes, Stitcher, or your favorite podcast app.

  • Leave an iTunes Review These are so important as they help our podcast reach more women with messages of encouragement.

  • Follow on Facebook and Instagram for the latest news and updates.

  • Share with others. My prayer is that this podcast brings encouragement to women and families, and I would be honored for you to tell others about it.

  • Join my friends and me in membership at Life with Sally, a place for me to share more teaching from the Bible and messages on education, motherhood, discipleship, and more!

God's Design for Mothers and Family

oxfordcollege.jpg

While living, traveling in Vienna, I am always struck by the beauty and quality of design in the buildings downtown. Each building was constructed with an elaborate plan that not only considered structural strength, but also beauty that validated the skill and craftsmanship of the architect.

Design takes intentionality, focus, purpose in mind. Intricate design creates beauty and form that give substance and long lasting elegance to place. I have been struck with how much we have lost the ability to value God's original elegant, purposeful design for home and family, yet we are not even aware of what we have lost because we lack a perspective or memory  of the beauty of the original design and what God intended it to be.

When God created the heavens and the earth, He created it with minute and detailed intricacy and order. There was color and form and beauty woven into every aspect of His creation, as an expression of His own life.

The pinnacle of creation, though,  was crafting man and woman in His image. And with this image, and relationships amongst those who would be His children, He created order and beauty within the structure of relationships called a family--a father, a mother, and children, and generations of family connections.

God's design is intricate, beautiful, complete. The purpose in giving these relationships was to provide a community of security, comfort, pleasure, inspiration, purpose, and belonging. Family was the perfect design before the fall, before there was any sin in the world.

Mother was the first name of the woman. Mother, by its very nature, embraces the giving of life to another outside of herself--a real live human being whose life will have implication for all of eternity. Motherhood requires accepting children as a gift, and giving them life--spiritual, emotional, intellectual, and moral.This is the greatest civilizing and most beautiful work a mother can perform. And when she skillfully builds a soul, by taking the time to give structure, beauty, and excellence to the life of her children, their souls will emerge with the very imprint of God's image and capacity for excellence in their lives.

And that is why we must return to the original design of motherhood and family. We must get into the heart of God's design if we are to manifest His purpose in relationship to our children, and value them appropriately, as God intended us to do.

Our 24 Family Ways Introduction: Foundations That Cannot Be Shaken

BEE4CBB7-C69B-48C2-938D-3E46D35A82D7.jpeg

Click here to listen to today’s new podcast episode.

What does it profit a man if he gains the whole world and loses his soul?

~Mark 8:36

Integrity: The quality of being strong and having strong moral principles; having soundness and wholeness in faith, word and deed.

Two groups of women have been meeting with me in the past weeks and I have also had personal appointments here in Oxford. Seeing a deep need for leadership and direction, I want so much to reteach the necessity for foundations. When a house is built on a strong, immovable foundation, it will, as Jesus said, not fall amidst many storms.

How do we give ourselves and our children a strong foundation or remind us and them of our foundation that will carry us through the many political, moral, spiritual and emotional storms of life in the years ahead? By remembering scripture, pondering it, tucking it into our hearts and building our lives around it again and again.

Many years ago, Clay and I dreamed up the idea of Our 24 Family Ways as we discussed our desire to disciple our children as we walked along the path of life together. As parents of young children, we wanted them to have strong foundations of godly character and an understanding of what it meant to please God so that they could develop integrity. It was one of the most important ideas we wanted to convey, as we knew Integrity is something that is developed over time. It must be taught, practiced, and lived over many years in order to grow strong and vibrant.

Our 24 Family Ways as a book grew out of that foundation of working through a simple way of teaching the most important ideas of Christian discipleship to our children. You can find a copy for your family at the link below, and for the next several months I’ll be sharing its major concepts here and on my podcast each week. I hope this will be a blessing to you as you train your own children and grow together in these areas!

I have learned the most about integrity by pondering my walk with God, searching my heart for attitudes that are not worthy of His love for me, and seeking direction from His word. We live in a world which seems to have walked away from the ideal of true integrity—actually being what you appear to be, truly and from the heart. Our world cares more about what people think we are than what we actually are. Seeking to keep up with the "Joneses" is age-old. But scripture is so clear that God wants our focus and love to be on Him first, and then on the very values of His heart.

Paul spoke of his need to remind believers again and again about the same truths so that they could keep afresh in their hearts those truths from the Bible that would never change, hold them fast, give them direction and a way to flourish each step of the way. Because of the turbulent nature of cultural storms, I feel this series is something that will encourage you and has kept me going forward through many seasons of life.

I hope you’ll enjoy this series!

Books Referenced in this Podcast:

FOR MORE

  • Subscribe to this podcast on iTunes, Stitcher, or your favorite podcast app.

  • Leave an iTunes Review These are so important as they help our podcast reach more women with messages of encouragement.

  • Follow on Facebook and Instagram for the latest news and updates.

  • Share with others. My prayer is that this podcast brings encouragement to women and families, and I would be honored for you to tell others about it.

  • Join my friends and me in membership at Life with Sally, a place for me to share more teaching from the Bible and messages on education, motherhood, discipleship, and more!

Shaping A Beautiful, Meaningful Life

CD047DCE-E2A6-4458-9EC6-90E20A05D141_1_201_a.jpeg

Play Episode on iTunes & Stitcher

Subdue: To work and rule over something in such a way as to cause it to flourish. Bringing order out of chaos.

“Mama, home was the place where my faith was ignited, my heart was filled with love, my mind was stretched to think profoundly, and my life was filled with beauty and goodness in every possible way. I never knew until now how much work, effort and vision it cost you. Thank you for doing all the hard work, Mama. It was a gift to all of us.”

What deep joy filled my heart as one of my adult children reflected upon this as we were walking together in local parks. I’m not sure they could appreciate it when they were growing up in my home. As I look back over my life as one who was responsible to bring order to my home, to bring harmony in our relationships, to create beauty in the midst of a dark time, I realize that much of my time was like wrestling to tame a wild beast. It was almost never easy, often looked messy from the outside and I was often so very weary and drained.

Yet, the more I understood that I was fashioned by God to bring life, to be a representation of His presence in the world, to see my domain as a place of influence and a place where human beings would be shaped in order to thrive, I could keep going. As long as my vision was clear and growing, my energy to pursue that vision kept coming one day at a time. Now, I see how very much it mattered.

Many have never understood what the point of motherhood was to begin with & feel lost. The demands of home, family life & motherhood presents endless work and challenge, with no end in sight. We can feel lost without a clear vision of why it matters to God’s beautiful and ultimate plan. We lose our personal identity without a sense of purpose. It is way too much work and effort if it doesn’t have an ultimate purpose or bring meaning to our own lives.

But what if God designed home, motherhood, family to be the foundational community upon which society was to emerge from—a place of truth, goodness, virtue, and wholeness? What if we were specifically designed to be caretakers of such a task because of the valued sacredness God placed on women because of His great esteem for them and their potential influence?

As women, one of the defining qualities intrinsic in being made in God's image, is the divine ability to create, to cultivate, to subdue, and to bring order from chaos. We are to take all of the raw materials of our lives and to craft them into something beautiful.

So, as being in His image, creative like Him, when we want to display a small bit of the divine through the beauty of our home, or the love He reflects through our own relationships, it encompass all of the moments of life. We rule over our domains in such a way to have order, rhythms, traditions, anchors in our schedule that provide for this divine reflection through the ways we have ruled over and subdued our own personal realm.

The Spirit of home,  stands at the doorways to compel those outside to enter into a place of life, comfort, rest, beauty.

But, you say, "My life is already so busy, I don't have time to add one more ideal."

The dilemma, then, is how to weave beauty, color, celebration into an already busy life, Understanding why we take the trouble to bring His spirit's presence into the moments of our lives gives emotional and spiritual fuel to keep going through all the years.

Today’s podcast is a clear and inspiring reflection of our purpose, our call, our significance to God’s ultimate plan.

Printable:

Books Referenced in this Podcast:

More Resources:

FOR MORE

  • Subscribe to this podcast on iTunes, Stitcher, or your favorite podcast app.

  • Leave an iTunes Review These are so important as they help our podcast reach more women with messages of encouragement.

  • Follow on Facebook and Instagram for the latest news and updates.

  • Share with others. My prayer is that this podcast brings encouragement to women and families, and I would be honored for you to tell others about it.

  • Join my friends and me in membership at Life with Sally, a place for me to share more teaching from the Bible and messages on education, motherhood, discipleship, and more!

Living With Integrity

sallywalknewyorkpic.JPG

Pondering my walk with God, searching my heart for attitudes that are not worthy of His love for me, seeking direction from His word, is a regular, foundational search of my heart.

We live in a world that, from the beginning, focuses on what other people think of our lives, behaviors, and possessions. Seeking to keep up with the "Joneses" is age old. But scripture is so very clear that God wants our focus, our love, our heart to be on Him first.

Surrounded by a world that gives us permission to be self-centered, we glance at ourselves and all of our pictures on Facebook, listening for that little bing that says someone has thought of us---Hey, everybody, want to look at me and notice what I am doing and comment on my blog and give me higher numbers if I give things away? And, and, and …

We become our own idols and strive for recognition and affirmation. It is not wrong to desire to be loved and to belong. But Jesus meant for us to find our meaning in our family, our community of believers, our neighbors—those we serve in our own day to day lives. We were meant to tie our lives to flesh and blood people whom we spend our lives to help, so that we can better understand Him, who spent all for our sakes.

In the story of the Good Samaritan, Jesus tells of the lives of those who could pontificate and argue the law and wear the fancy robes that indicated righteousness, and yet He exposes the worthlessness of their teaching by pointing out their hearts which neglected those who really needed redemption.

Who has time to give to such a person as the man robbed on the side of the road? After all, we have our appointments, our priorities, our to-do-lists, and schedules to keep. "Just a minute,” we object, “can't you see I am doing something important?!”

“‘Let no wise man boast of his wisdom, nor let the mighty man boast of his might, nor a rich man boast of his riches; but let the one who boasts boast of this, that he understands and knows Me, that I am the LORD who exercises mercy, justice, and righteousness on the earth; for I delight in these things,’ declares the LORD.”

~Jeremiah 9:23-24

As I read God’s words over and over again, I understand anew, it matters little what others think of me, if God is not at the center of my desire to live for His glory.

And so I am searching again to find out how to reorder my life to please Him, to discern what is the specific work He has given me to do right now, how I may invest in real people with real needs who are nearby, so that His loving touch will reach those in my immediate culture.

“What does it profit a man if he gains the whole world and loses his soul?”

~Mark 8:36

When I live in true integrity of following hard after Him, my children will see Jesus living in my home--not philosophy or curriculum or denomination or rules, but the real Christ who lays down His life, shepherds the sheep of His fold, and cares about real people.

True personal integrity comes from following hard after Him and obeying what He has called me to do.

What does integrity look like to you?

Advocate Or Adversary? How to Train our Children & Podcast

4B1C1444-7222-4BC4-B5EC-2AAEC89C4B09_1_201_a.jpeg

Click here to play todays’s new podcast episode.

“The One who knew said, “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven.” Happy, that is are those people who know that their spiritual power is small, that their creeds are imperfect, that their instruction concerning God and man is incomplete. Happy are those who know that they do not know all of the truth,. For only those who admit their spiritual poverty are willing to learn. Agnes Sanford, 1897-1982

The older I get, the more I see my own propensity to be petty, selfish, small minded in the way I view life. Of course, because I love God, I have sought His wisdom, learned to obey His ways, sought to overcome my shortcomings. Yet, I see that He has been patient with me and is ever ready, because of His unchanging love, to receive me, to extend grace, to give me a place of peace and acceptance when I come to Him every day.

But, my shepherd, leads me beside still waters, He restores my soul. He is the one who takes responsibility for my training, my growth, my well being.

Seems that when I write on child discipline, I always get the most interest and controversy at the same time. I would never want to offend anyone, but it is a huge issue and debate amongst believers.  My desire is to offer, perhaps, some perspective and to encourage parents in this role. I never want to offend or hurt anyone's feelings, and yet, I have learned the a gentle answer turns away wrath. Our sweet children need our gentleness and patience even as we need God's.

But the questions keep coming: How do we do it? What is the method? What are the rules for every single situation, age, and how to match the discipline to the action? What to do? What to do?

And yet, I have realized over the years that the most important element to a Christian parent, in regards to discipline, is not the method, but the heart attitude towards God as a Father of us.

Let me define two words, though, that helps to define the way we look at God, and the way we might see our children.

Advocate: One who supports the life, cause, actions of another. To be supportive, for the best outcome of the one they are defending, serving, helping

Adversary: One who is at odds with, actively against, opposes or resists another’s personality, behavior or beliefs.

Advesarial Parenting

If one believes that God is works oriented, possibly harsh in correcting our sin, looking for what we do wrong,, relentless in pursuing our keeping of the law, then one will be more likely to be harsh in discipline, and feel it is an obligation of parents to correct and point out every flaw of character and immaturity of a child. It is a belief-- that  correct behavior is the goal. Consequently, at the heart of this method is control of the one who makes mistakes.  Many parents I know honestly believe in harsh discipline methods, with a good heart, thinking they are saving their child's soul. This is the parent who embraces adversarial parenting.

Advocate Parenting

However, I believe that the more a person truly understands the character of God and His mercy and love and patience and servant's heart as a parent toward his children, then one must adopt the role of an advocate towards their children as God is our advocate. Even as the Holy Spirit is our advocate and as Jesus lives daily to intervene and to pray for us, His children, so God is there to help us, to love us, to draw us, through His love and mercy, to His holiness.

Indeed, God is our advocate and models to us a parent's love that eventually ended for him in sacrificing His whole life for the sake of His children.

What about training? Obviously, because God wants our best, His spirit is constantly instructing us, convicting us, reminding us, blessing us as we seek to obey His wisdom. But maturity is a lifetime process, a journey from babyhood to adulthood and wisdom—even the way children were born reflects this.

We believed in cultivating a parenting style that focussed on our children’s hearts, their growth, their desire to please us and God with respectful obedience.

High love and high training was the way we sought to reach and train our children’s hearts. We saw the God given potential in each of them, the abundant design in their lives to become strong, holy, exhibiting the very character and virtue of God. That is why we wrote the 24 Family Ways—to give them leadership, instruction about the ways to live a godly life.

When a person knows what is expected, understands the concept and can grow in the direction of truth, the muscles of behavior become stronger. And so we sought to teach our children truth and the knowledge of basic righteousness. And we used this instruction to give them a way forward and to correct them when they chose to drift from the truth we presented to them as the ways of God.

In other words, it is:

  1. Instructing: Teaching the ways and truth of God

  2. Giving stories, metaphors to help understand this truth as Jesus did

  3. Clearly helping our children to understand that they have a will, the ability to choose to obey or to rebel.

  4. We helped them understand there were consequences to their choices: blessing if they chose to follow God’s ways, correction or despair and darkness for choosing to turn away. (life has its own consequences built in)

  5. We corrected them based on what they understood and also according to their age and ability to understand.

Train up a child in the way he should go, And even when he is old he will not depart from it.” Proverbs 22:6 is known by so many of us. Training is a lifelong process. It is an instruction, correction, consequences over and over again sort of teaching—and understanding of it grows over time.

The reason God admonished parents to teach their children morning, noon, and night and in between was because he wanted them to understand it was a way of life sort of responsibility—

“And you shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These words I am commanding youtoday are to be upon your hearts. And you shall teach them diligently to your children and speak of them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.…” Deut. 6:5-7

First, His truth and ways are to be on our hearts because we are storing them up every day, through the years. Then, we are to gently give instruction, modeling, showing the ways of righteousness in all the organic ways we live in relationship to our world and to others.

Teaching isn’t just in a devotional reading for 5 minutes a day, it happens as a way of seeing life all day, every day, through all the years.

Even as Romans tells us that God is for us, (If God is for us, who can be against us? Romans 8:31) so our children long to know we are “for” them and that they can come to us at all times in all situations because they have learned to trust that we are their advocates.

And we remember that even as we are drawn to God because of HIs mercy and love, so will our children be.

“Or do you think lightly of the riches of His kindness and tolerance and patience, not knowing that the kindness of God leads you to repentance?” Romans 2:4

And so we become our children’s advocates, always for them, defending them, protecting them and helping them grow as we extend the mercy, kindness and teachings of God.

We see that King David was a man who often sinned, who made mistakes, who asked God for forgiveness, but who sought God with all of his heart. And David saw God as the great sheered who cared for him, led him, restored his soul. Psalm 23 is a beautiful picture of our God as a shepherd caring for us, His sheep. And so we seek to understand this relationship that we might shepherd our own children.

***************

The next months, I will be repeating the 24 Family Ways as a foundation for passing on truth and wisdom to our children and also as an objective way we may train, correct, lead them forward in the ways of God.

I will also be doing a special podcast series on biblical concepts, based on the life example and words of Christ, that I hope will lead all who listen to biblical concepts that give us direction and leadership in our ways.

Books Referenced in this Podcast:

FOR MORE

  • Subscribe to this podcast on iTunes, Stitcher, or your favorite podcast app.

  • Leave an iTunes Review These are so important as they help our podcast reach more women with messages of encouragement.

  • Follow on Facebook and Instagram for the latest news and updates.

  • Share with others. My prayer is that this podcast brings encouragement to women and families, and I would be honored for you to tell others about it.

  • Join my friends and me in membership at Life with Sally, a place for me to share more teaching from the Bible and messages on education, motherhood, discipleship, and more!