40 Years: Anchors to Hold Us Fast in the Storms of Marriage

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Sitting together by our little outdoor fireplace, thoroughly drinking in the cool mountain air , our conversation with our children bubbled up as we contemplated 40. years of marriage which we are celebrating today.

Forty Years ago, we stood in front of family and friends and made vows before God to love, honor and cherish one another, “till death do us die.” So many graces and sweet memories fill our hearts. We could not have fathomed what the years would hold and how God would use our marriage in our world. Building the legacy of Clarkson, our feasts, our faith, music, celebrating life together, making memories, books written, conferences held, cherishing holidays and cultivating our own story—there are soooo many memories over the pathways of our marriage.

There are sweet blessings and a deep comfort to know that we are still here, together. Our partnership before God has endured. Our familiarity with one another’s ways and the myriad years we shared has given us a precious treasure I could not have understood when we began.

Yet, as with every couple, there were so many challenging seasons to live through. Building a legacy of faith and faithfulness through 19 moves, (7 internationally), sharing together the births four children, (3 miscarriages), of living together through all the seasons of sleepless, sick babies, demanding toddlerhood, adventuresome pre-school, golden elementary years, hormonal, push-back teen years, straining into young adulthood seasons, and now grand babies..

Storms and winds of darkness swept through our lives so many times. Thousands of meals, messes to clean up, illnesses, car wrecks, difficulties galore, hospitalizations, difficult times of feeling isolated, mentally ill children, countless dark nights of the soul journeys. We grew from immaturity and selfishness toward humility, grace and selflessness in a long process of obedience, admitting our flaws, straining to understand how to love and commitment.

But there had to be anchors that held us fast in storms. Anchors keep the ship from spinning away, from losing destination. Our vows were one of the anchors that kept us going, one day, one year at a time.

Early in our faith life, we were taught that vows before God are sacred and meant to be kept, no matter what. I had learned a number of verses that spoke of the importance of vows—that they are a picture of God’s never ending faithfulness to us as our forever savior and God. Since God would never part from us when we are covenanted to Him through Christ, marriage pictures that. When the storms threatened to draw us into the darkness of the gales of life, we depended on the anchor—keeping our vows held us fast.

Numbers 30:2 If a man vows a vow to the Lord, or swears an oath to bind himself by a pledge, he shall not break his word. He shall do according to all that proceeds out of his mouth.

Marriage is a sacred calling, a marathon for those who stay committed, a reward when a legacy is revealed and a blessing to those who are able to persevere, to stay steadfast.

In a fallen world, many precious ones find themselves in heart-breaking circumstances in broken marriages, and find themselves alone. We are all broken and in need of the sweet mercy of Jesus. I understand that everyone's story is different and I have deep love and sympathy for anyone whose journey has brought such pain. Many sweet friends have lived through these very difficult times and I pray God's gracious love brings healing and comfort. Every story, every life can be redeemed and healed over time.

Yet, when, if we are able to follow God's ideals and stay the course of our marriages, we are building foundations where loyal love, and virtuous commitment can be a story lived out in real life to show the reality of God's unconditional, forever love for us.

The man said,

"This is now bone of my bones,

And flesh of my flesh;

She shall be called Woman,

Because she was taken out of Man."

For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. ~ Genesis 2:23-24

These are serious words. They are words of covenant, of God’s design for marriage. Yet those of us who have entered into such a covenant have also learned a difficult truth: it’s easier said than done!

While today’s culture looks upon marriage as something to provide self-fulfillment, easily entered into and simply though regretfully ended when one or both partners decide they’ve “fallen out of love” or “just aren’t compatible” anymore, we can see in the damage done to our society that marriage is much more than our current view might suggest.

How grateful I am that Clay stood by me through all of my fits and starts, my moments of immaturity. And now we plan our lives—what can we partner to do together for the kingdom of God in the years God allows us to be together?

Marriage is meant to be a picture of the love Christ has for the church; His commitment and persevering faithfulness to us. He said He would never leave us or forsake us. He laid down his life for us.  Jesus treasures marriage because it is the holy place where His love for the world is modeled by how we practice giving to one another and staying the course of our commitment. What might you do to strengthen your own marriage, today? Today, Clay and I are praying for all of you, that you might know God’s grace and strength in your marriages.

Join me on my podcast today where I share more about our story of marriage, some content from Help, I’m Drowning about our marriage, and the ways we were able to live through the storms that came blowing through the many twists and turns of our lives.

Books Referenced in this Podcast:

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Everyone Fails -- We Only Make It Because of Grace

"For through the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think more highly of himself than he ought to think; but to think so as to have sound judgment, as God has allotted to each a measure of faith." Romans 12:3

The storms of my mundane, everyday stress were about to spew. Pounding down our long winding stairs, my anger mounted with each step. I could hear my boys fussing. Sarah and Joy were nowhere to be seen, and still the dishes were piled high—none of the chores I had meted out had been accomplished. As I reached the bottom stairs, I began blasting everyone loudly from the bottom of my toes.

Sarah and Joy came out of their rooms and peered over the railing to the main floor to see what all of the ruckus was about.

My frustration wasn't just about this day. It seemed I had been storing up my anger for quite a while. Many days in a row of messes, fussing, carrying it alone. All the children stared at me partially in fear and partially with humor twittering at their lips--which made me all the more angry. I did not appreciate being a source of humor to this crowd.

Of course, as soon as I quit, I was appalled at myself. What good mother yells like that What damage had I done?

Sarah, the typical oldest child, responsible, compassionate, taking responsibility,  brought me a cup of tea, and sheepishly began,

'Mama, you know how much we all love you. I think you should consider when you feel anger and frustration building up and try to manage it--decide not to blow-- just before you feel like you are going to, because it always makes you feel worse than we do."

Has your child ever been the adult who counseled you!!Does anyone else ever feel this shameful regret? After all, I am a fairly mature believer; I write about motherhood, I love my children, so what comes over me at these times? Maybe I should quit writing and speaking until I have more integrity, the voices whisper to me in my failure.

Sometimes I punish myself when I blow it, as though I am above sinning and am shocked at my failure. I hate to hurt the feelings of my children.

Yet somewhere inside I know all of us blow it in some way almost every day. We are selfish at heart, limited in virtue, and in need of forgiveness--but mostly we need the grace of living beyond our guilt.

Each of us is tempted at times to the kind of pride that pretends we are better than others. However, Jesus was so very clear about our nature and propensity to fall short in every ideal possible. John writes, "If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves."

Jesus does not judge me by my fleshly frailty, but by my heart of love for Him, my utter dependence on His grace, and my heart of gratitude for His enduring patience.

If you have blown it, and feel like a failure, walk in His wonderful grace today, even in the midst of your shortcomings. Remember, you are defined by His strength and provision, not your own limitations. This is why you need a Savior. He forgets our sin, but we remember his grace and humbly walk each day with Him.

Ponder these verses:

"Love covers a multitude of sin." 1 Peter 4:8

"There is therefore, now, no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus." Romans 8:1

"It was for freedom that Christ set us free, therefore, keep standing firm so that you may not be subject to a yoke of slavery." Galatians 5:1

"Nothing can separate us from the love of God," Romans 8

The storms of exhaustion and frustration catch us all. But God is the storm calmer. May you find today, the rest and peace that comes from living into His gracious, gentle, and compassionate heart.

Help, I’m Drowning: Weathering the Storms of Life with Grace and Hope

Help, I'm Drowning: Weathering the Storms of Life with Grace and Hope

By Clarkson, Sally

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We Take Care of What We Have: Our 24 Family Ways #12

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Way #12: We take care of what we have, using it responsibly.

Memory Verse

“He who is faithful in a very little thing is faithful also in much; and he who is unrighteous in a very little thing is unrighteous also in much." Luke 16:10

Many areas of life can become training grounds for our children. One area Joy loved learning responsibility in was gardening. When she was a small child, I brought her with me into the garden when I planted roses, cultivated irises and daffodils, and made our yard as beautiful as I could. Though it is very hard to grow plants and flowers at 7300 feet altitude and on the rock base of our land, I have attempted to grow many different plants. I love flowers and am determined to keep trying until I make the perfect garden!

Each year I would take my children with me and have them do the work by my side. Because we were blessed with a home and an expanse of land around it, I told them it was our responsibility and privilege to make it as beautiful as we could. These days, Joy is still inclined to plant her own garden each year because she gained an appetite for creating beauty through me training her to be a steward of our home and garden. When she returned from college over the years, one of the first things she would do each summer was to buy herbs, tomato plants, and a few cutting flowers to plant. The training and breathing into her of these appetites have formed a pattern in her heart for being a steward of beauty.

So it is with other areas. Reaching out to our neighbors to love them and share God's love with our children in tow gives our children a sense of stewardship for ministry. Giving them a jar to save their loose change in eventually means a whole jar-full, that they can then give to whatever mission strikes their hearts.

Counseling our children a million times to make peace with a sibling or helping them learn to work hard with the family to ready the house for out-of-town company builds a self-image that says, “I am responsible to be faithful to serve others.”

How can you bring your children into the areas you faithfully cultivate and steward today? As you train them to be faithful in their small corner of the world, their capacity and stewardship will also grow as they become better prepared for all that God will call them to as world changers for his Kingdom. Caring for everything God has given us is the foundation for all of this.

What you teach, model, and practice for your children is what they are most likely to value when they grow up. Give them small ways to be faithful in your home, so they can become strong in exercising bigger stewardship muscles when they are adults.

Faithfulness does not happen all at once, and none of my children were perfectly faithful—it takes time to come to understand a concept, train it, explain it, and model it. Each person grows imperfectly, but it is a growing towards the ideal. When we see that they have a sense of their own personal call to be faithful, then we know they are ready to extend mature wisdom in making “faithful” decisions in their own personal lives.

How will you help your children develop a heart for care-taking, today?

Our 24 Family Ways: A Family Devotional Guide

By Clarkson, Clay

Sometimes, We Are Our Own Storms

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Sometimes it is the raging seas, the storms of emotion that rage inside of us that enact the storms we must weather.

I’m so selfish and petty and keep saying and doing things in ways that are totally embarrassing and unacceptable.

I’m a terrible mom, wife, friend.

I hate my life and can’t find a way forward.

Why is this happening to me?

I feel so alone and I don’t think I have anyone who really cares about me.

My personality is too much…too small…too imperfect.

I feel like a failure.

We are all of us imperfect, say ridiculous things, fail to live up to, into our own ideals. It is a part of being human. God is certainly not surprised or disappointed because he didn’t have expectations that we would ever be “perfect” in our external performance of life.

He also understands our feelings, our temptations, our fears, our frailty and places of tender vulnerability.

Do you have to find a hiding place in your home? Or at least a place where occasionally you can have a few minutes by yourself to ponder life? This room has become my new place to work, escape, hide--hoping that maybe no one will make the extra effort to climb the stairs to our second floor to find me. We all need some alone time to put life back into order.

This was Sarah's bedroom until she moved to Oxford. and then, married Thomas. There is something about being here in the place where we spent so many wonderful hours as friends that feels like sweet memories still linger. But she took one of her bunny statues back to her home with Thomas.

One day, I was shopping at one of my favorite dusty second hand bookstores. This little rabbit lamp seemed to call out my name. And, it was 50% off.

“Why the discount?” I asked

"It has a little crack," said the clerk, "so I will sell it to you at half price!"

Then I knew is was to be mine!

Somehow his little crack along his neck makes me feel like we are friends. I have a passionate heart. I want to be good, always loving, faithful, patient, unselfish. But then there is the crack and many flaws in my own life. You see, I’m just the slightest bit wonky. I have hidden imperfections, too. 

One of my adult children told me over the holidays, "You know what, mama? Sometimes when I awaken in the mornings the first thing that hovers over my mind like a cloud is this unspecific feeling that i have disappointed someone or that I have failed at something. it's just there under the surface."

I so sympathized with this statement. Many of us carry the burden on our backs of weariness and a sense of inadequacy. Sometimes we carry difficult marriages, past scars, tension of hard relationships that will never end, financial burdens, guilt for our failures. Lately, I have received various notes and comments from women all over the world who are weary or sad or losing hope.

But, God longs for us to rid ourselves of these performative works expectations that we carry inside.

Lately, I have received various notes and comments from women all over the world who are weary or sad or losing hope.

Just this week, in my quiet time, I was drawn to the sermon on the mount. As I read His words in Matt. 6, I was so gently touched by the kind, merciful heart of Christ. In a world where the Pharisees were measuring spirituality by external performance, getting it all right--saying right prayers, giving the right offerings, I remembered what Jesus had said about them, "They tie up heavy, burdensome loads and lay on men's shoulders, they themselves are not willing to lift a finger to help them. All their deeds are done for men to see. 

Our world does so often focus on the external behavior.

But when I read the words of Jesus, I find hope for my imperfections, my failures, my crazy personality. 

I was imagining what it was like: Crowds were gathering as Jesus climbed to the top of a mountain to teach. Women holding crying babes were struggling to get their children settled. Men with scowling faces amongst the crowd with looks of defeat, spouses glancing with hurt feelings, cripples, teens smiling, giggling, and flirting with friends they had known their whole life, children running playing tag--a whole host of people from the slice of life were gathering to hear this man speak to them. Jesus was looking inside their hearts to prepare to teach about what those who were gathering needed to hear so that they would truly understand God better.

His message was one of comfort, sympathy for the pressures they were feeling, the tension stored up in their hearts. Jesus gave a message they longed to hear but didn't even know they needed it until He spoke.

3 “[b]Blessed are the [c]poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

4 “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.

5 “Blessed are the [d]gentle, for they shall inherit the earth.

6 “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied.

7 “Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy.

8 “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.

9 “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.

10 “Blessed are those who have been persecuted for the sake of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

11 “Blessed are you when people insult you and persecute you, and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of Me. 12 Rejoice and be glad, for your reward in heaven is great; for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

These are what we need in our own lives: mercy, comfort, justice, understanding, truth, peace, forgiveness, a right relationship with God. 

And so, for those of us who feel the burdens that a fallen, broken world brings, Jesus offers us love, kindness, and understanding. 

The unconditional love of Christ means more each day.

 He sees us with compassion, he loves us as we are, he speaks to us with encouragement, he offers us hope,

He extends His help because He is the Father who loves us. His love changes everything. It is as we offer to others who feel imperfect the unconditional love of God, that their lives will be transformed. 

And it is His love, through us, that will transform the lives of our children.

Help, I'm Drowning: Weathering the Storms of Life with Grace and Hope

By Clarkson, Sally

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The Storm of Loneliness & Isolation & Giveaway!

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"Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor.
For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up." Ecc. 4:9

Today, I wish I could have you over for a cup of tea, some delicious treat and spend a couple of hours sharing our hearts, dreams, life, sadnesses, fears, and all that is swirling around in our heads. Truly, my love is to have personal times with women.

As I look back over the storms of my life, loneliness and isolation, when I did not feel like I had one person I could think of to help me bear my burdens, I was most tempted to crater.

This verse expressed my needs perfectly! Woe to the one who has no one to lift him up!

Bearing darkness, a sense of failing, and discouragement alone created so many of my personal struggles and depletion and emotional storms. And this led to despair where I was tempted to quit my ideals. There were many times when I found myself alone that made me feel I was drowning in the circumstances of life and tempted me to quit some of my ideals. Not because I didn’t believe in them any more.

But often, when I felt like I was failing or too exhausted or fearful of the season in which we found ourselves, or fill in the blank.

That’s why today I want to give away 2 Tea Time Mentoring Sessions with me and one of you. In other words, on Friday, I will pick two people to win a personal time of sharing lives over the internet with me. It won’t be exactly like being on my porch, but it will be face to face and chatting about whatever is on your mind.

To enter, please leave a comment, share the post with a friend, follow me and be sure to use the hashtag #HelpImDrowningbook. I have done several mentoring online sessions recently and I have enjoyed it so much.

Today on my podcast, I talk about the kind of friend that helped me make it through some of my darkest days. I hope you will share it, too, and be encouraged to be that kind of a friend for someone who needs your love today.

Tomorrow, Tuesday, at 1:00 mountain time I will come on Insta live to discuss some of the storms of my life, how to weather the winds and waves that threatened to overcome me. I will also discuss how lament and being sad is a part of making it through—that it is ok to struggle. Also, some of the ways I had to learn to make it through a disappointing world. I hope you will share with your friends and plan to join me.

What kind of friend are you? I pray each of you will be the kind of friend your own people need and that you will have that kind of a friend now, whatever storm you are weathering.

Books Referenced in this Podcast:

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We Are Generous With What We Have: Our 24 Family Ways #11

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Way #11: We are generous with what we have, sharing freely with others.

MEMORY VERSE: 

“Each one must do just as he has purposed in his heart, not grudgingly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.”

II Cor. 9:7

For two years in a row, the Colorado Springs are where I live had devastating fires. Many houses were destroyed and families displaced, and it was difficult to watch many struggle during that season. However, the situation also let us see generosity expressed in amazing ways.

One man’s story was shared on the local news. He did not sit home and wonder what to do, but took initiative to go out and buy gallons and gallons of water to give to those who had been waiting to be allowed to return and see their beloved homes after the area was cleared.

Others, too, showed the kind of community support that I have not experienced on a regular basis in our area. An estimated 1,000 people lined the streets outside of the Black Forest Fire command center one night to say thank you to the heroic firefighters, national guardsmen, police officers, and sheriff's deputies who had worked long hours, without sleep, to protect their homes.

Generosity is an expression of the way one sees him or herself.

Giving our time, love, consideration, and thoughtfulness to those surrounding us is one of the ways people are able to perceive the love of Christ, expressed through us. Everything we have belongs to God. Our possessions are not only for us to use, but for the service and provision of others. God entrusts us with resources so we will be good stewards of His provision in order to help others.

GENEROSITY, THEN, FLOWS FROM A PERSON WHO PERCEIVES HIMSELF AS A STEWARD OF GOD'S GIFTS.

During the fires, as we housed sweet family friends whose home was at times right in the center of the infrared map, we watched them as they lived what they had practiced--the joyful and humble trust of God.

One morning, as they heard of family friends who lost their home, their first response was to say, "What would most help this family? Let's give a gift card to Target, get their kids some new clothes, and visit them to cheer them up. They probably need a lot of support right now."

The heart of Jesus is to give whatever is required to save His beloved children. In our case, He had to give His all.

Generosity is caught when taught and modeled. It is learned when practiced. It plants seeds in the heart when, out of great thanksgiving to God for all that He has done, we give out of our resources to His kingdom causes and to others who are in need.

When we capture the reality of God's nature being extravagantly generous on our behalf, this character quality born in our lives and trained into the lives of our children reflects a love that will reach hearts.

Serving together is a wonderful way to train our children in generosity.

Practical ways we practiced giving as a family included:

*Serving meals at homeless shelters

*teaching children's Sunday School classes as a family or caring for children while single moms did Christmas shopping

*Helping with work days to serve the elderly, single moms, and those who were unable to mow their lawns

*Hosting missionaries in our home when they were on furlough and helping them gather goods to send back to the country in which they lived

*Gathering money weekly from the kids, storing it in a jar, and turning it into a check at a bank to send to the cause our family voted on after a period of time

*Making meals and decorating "love" cards for neighbors and those who were ill, in the hospital or had a loss in the family.

*Baking plates of cookies for new neighbors and visiting their home to say welcome.

*Stuffing shoe boxes full of toys and books for overseas friends who did not have material goods.

There are so many ways to give, but making it a habit, taking the time to plan it is the key to seeing the root of generosity grow in the culture of our lives and our family's lives.

Our 24 Family Ways: A Family Devotional Guide

By Clarkson, Clay

The World Needs Brave Mamas, Now!

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There are always clouds on the horizon—and storms at this time in history are constantly forming. It is true for my adult kids as well. A few years ago, one of them said, (though they all say this from time to time,

“Mama, I just want to be home. I want to hear your answers, eat your food, live in stability for a few days, be friends and refuel a bit. This has been so hard.” from an unnamed Clarkson child.

It is how life is conducted in the day to day, the mundane, the home rituals where stability, peace of mind, comfort in a whirling world matters so much. To have such rhythms of life requires one who will direct and conduct the love, beauty, peace, truth and comfort—it doesn’t just happen by chance.

As I look upon the landscape of our culture, it seems that more than anything else, adults who love God with all of their hearts—who practice righteousness, who have a heart to reach others, who stand strong against the moral battles of this day— are what is most desperately needed in our world.

God intended for righteousness to be passed on from one generation to the next by mentoring the children who would become this kind of adult. It would be that they would effectively pass on God's Kingdom messages and values and loyal allegiance to Him to those in their own generation. The key to building healthy, godly souls comes from growing to maturity in a home where this life of Christ is lived, breathed and taught.

Mothers were God's finest idea of how such a legacy would be passed on each generation. Mothers were designed by Him to shape and influence the hearts of children who would become the next generation of godly leaders in the sanctuary of their own homes. Mothers have the capacity to inspire messages of truth and hope, to model love and servant leadership, to build mental and academic strength by overseeing the education of her children, to lead in faith and to build a haven of all that is good, true and beautiful.

Satan would love to obscure such an important calling so that generations could not be so well built. He would diminish marriage, having children, family, our walk with God, and loyal love, the glue that holds all of these relationships together.

This is exactly why it is so important that mothers today receive instruction, encouragement, support, and wisdom so that they can continue this great calling in their lifetime, so that history will mark her investment by the lives her children are enabled to lead.

There will always be storms on the horizon or storms coming or storms that just passed. Yet, how we face life in the midst of the storms determines the legacy that we leave. If we give up or give in, we are leaving a legacy of quitting and allowing storms to determine the actions of our lives.

One of the most fulfilling works of life, more of a blessing than I would ever have imagined, is to have built with Clay these wonderful children into godly adults. What blessing and love God had in mind when He gifted me, my children, as the best work of faith I will probably ever do!

My prayer for you, at this time, is that you will embrace your eternally significant role and that you will know just how much your children are hoping you will be faithful to God. Your faithfulness ensures that they may be trained in spiritual strength, moral excellence, and the influence of righteousness. I pray that every day, you will have a vision for understanding how very much each day of your faithful serving as a mom matters to God and to His wonderful plan to create us for this role.

I wish each of you a blessed day today. I wrote my books to build a strong and visual picture for the hearts and minds of women all over the world to provide a vision that gives confidence and hope for being an intentional mama or parent or aunty or grandma.

Get your copy today:

Help, I'm Drowning: Weathering the Storms of Life with Grace and Hope

By Clarkson, Sally

Waiting in the Meantime By Cultivating a Beautiful Life

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Lamentations 3:25
The Lord is good to those who wait for him, to the soul who seeks him.

Over 150 times in the Bible the word wait is used, and waiting is not usually what we want to do. Even as I observe how God works in creation, I see that waiting is a very normal part of the process.

Every June, the fields in Oxford are covered with buttercups, breathtakingly beautiful. But they are for a short season and then we wait again, through the cold storms of winter, another whole year, until we can again enjoy the glorious beauty.

Waiting, waiting, waiting seems to cover most of life.

Waiting to get a driver’s liscense when a teen.

Wait to get out of college, Wait for a job,Waiting to get married,

Waiting to get pregnant,

Waiting for the baby to be born, then sleep through the night, then get out of diapers, to walk, then……

Waiting for friendship, for prodigals to return, for teens to mature, better jobs, a better house, a better church, different circumstances, and on and on till you die. If we are always waiting until we can be happy, we will be disappointed most of life.

Often, emotional storms of our lives occur in a winter season, when life feels cold and dying. Waiting for the next thing that we suppose will make us happy, we drag through our days.. During these times we struggle with feelings of fear, “what if’s,” despair, isolation, loneliness, exhaustion.

Threatening storms, the anguish in a hard time, the pressure when we don’t know what is ahead, can hang heavy upon us. We bide our time because of our need to make it through the darkness and clouds. Often, we are tempted just to “gut it out” and just barely live through the long wait with the illusion that we will be happy when the “thing” we are waiting for happens.

But if we do not find contentment, joy, pleasure in the meantime while we wait, we will waste most of life. And in the wasting, our hearts and souls will grow in despair. And often the things we were waiting for didn’t bring the perfect solution we were hoping for.

“In the meantime,” the time between what we want and when we get an answer embodies most of life. Most days are pretty much the same: Eating, working, cleaning up, sleeping and then again.

But, what we choose to do with our life “in the meantime” is what will write most of the story of our whole lives. To leave a legacy of love, faith, joy, goodness we must search for them in the hidden, mundane days, not in the exceptional events.

As I pondered the life of my whole family at present, it seems that all of us are waiting right now—waiting for a surgery date, children waiting for job opportunities, housing, future jobs, etc.

Who you are “in the wait” and how you cultivate your life in the meantime is shaping your character, your faith, your life messages more than anything else.

Cultivating a life filled with beautiful rhythms, life giving rituals, attitudes of gratefulness, is what shapes our hearts and minds in the midst of the storms. The agency we have to believe forward in God’s goodness and faithfulness will make every day meaningful, every day a gift, as we wait with hope.

In the meantime, today, as you wait for life to pass, how are you living well? What are you doing to validate each day as one in which you can rejoice and see God’s goodness?

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• Subscribe to this podcast on iTunes, Stitcher, or your favorite podcast app.

• Leave an iTunes Review These are so important as they help our podcast reach more women with messages of encouragement.

• Follow on Facebook and Instagram for the latest news and updates.

• Share with others. My prayer is that this podcast brings encouragement to women and families, and I would be honored for you to tell others about it.

• Join my friends and me in membership at Life with Sally, a place for me to share more teaching from the Bible and messages on education, motherhood, discipleship, and more!

Light a Candle in Your Family's Darkness

"Mama, one of the things that most distinguishes you is that you are always a hopeful person. No matter what would happen, you always pointed us to hope."

How surprised I was to hear this from a child, as I have often felt I was barely struggling through the many challenges that threatened to overcome our family over the years! I realized early on that children long to have a happy mother. In a time when media spreads the gloom and doom of catastrophes, fears, and threats, a mama can spread light, thankfulness, and hope so her children feel secure and safe. But when a mama lives darkly, the children harbor fear and insecurity and blame themselves for their parents being angry or sad.

Women who choose hope and choose to trust God are those who, instead of cursing the darkness, light a candle. But this is a conscious choice of the will. Hope is not a feeling, it is a commitment to hold fast to what scripture reminds us is true about God. Knowing scripture, pondering it and truly taking it into your soul, is what gives each of us fuel to live the Christian life as we listen to the Holy Spirit guide us through the wisdom we have learned. The only way to live well is to live in fellowship with God. Nothing else will satisfy.

We live in an imperfect world filled with disappointments, devastation, and difficulty. Without hope, our lives can feel absolutely purposeless sometimes. In my own life, I have struggled with hardships I never could have seen coming. My heart has been broken, my faith has been tested, and I have had to push myself in ways that I couldn't have imagined. Circumstances will come our way, and we will always have a choice to make. We can choose to give up, or we can choose hope.

"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." -Romans 15:13

Oh to allow the Holy Spirit to fill me to overflowing with hope.

Hope it not just wishful thinking. Hope is an assurance that our King has ultimately won the raging battle. Hope teaches us that this is the broken place where we have the honor of believing Him who is fighting on our behalf.

Hope anchors the soul and keeps us grounded.

"This hope we have as an anchor of the soul, a hope both sure and steadfast and one which enters within the veil." ~Hebrews 6:19

When we have nothing else to rely on, our hope in God is what connects us to what is true. As Romans 15:13, above, tells us, when we put our trust in God, we can overflow with hope. This hope from the Holy Spirit is such a powerful entity, it can make us truly unstoppable.

But faith is a choice that requires us to relinquish our fears, doubts and worries into the hands of God--like a child who says, "I will trust my mama and daddy because I know they are good and reliable." So we say, I will give this into God’s hands because I know He is good and loving and reliable.

Hope gives us the strength to take on our future. Hope can cure the incurable. No circumstance, no problem, no issue, no devastation is too large or too difficult for God to take on. However, we have to choose this hope. We must receive it. Sometimes, life can beat us down and make us feel absolutely defeated. But when we choose to carry the hope God has given us, we are able to overcome anything.

Faith is the assurance of things hoped for (Hebrews 11:1).

My hope rests in God's character and ability to see me through. He who answers prayer. He who is always good. He who has overcome the world. He who has forgiven every sin. He who will never leave me or forsake me. I can leave my issues in the file drawer of heaven and know that He has the ability to work them out and to cause "all things to work together for the good for them who love Him."

The God-given gift of hope is the best possible medicine for any hardship in life. My hope says that I am willing to wait on God's timing, God's way and God's will with a belief that I will look back and be amazed at the ways He showed his faithfulness. My hope is what carried me through health issues, struggles in my family, going five years without a salary, and so much more. Hope is the physician of each misery, and God has given us this gift to heal us from our pasts so that we may have a future that is full of joy and light.

Do your children watch you in your tests of faith and see you walking in hope and trust as an example to them of how they will need to live their adult lives?

Precious Heavenly Father,

I humbly acknowledge that you are faithful and that you see me and know my battles. Lord, I want to choose to be a person of hope because of my faith in you. Please take my burdens into your own hands, and through the Holy Spirit, restore my heart to peace. Let my choice to praise you please you, because my spiritual service of worship is to hope in you each day. Thank you for your patience and love for me. I love you, too, sweet Lord.

Help!!! Sally’s Drowning!

Click here to listen to today’s new podcast episode.

Many years ago, I was at the height of demands on my life: 2 teenagers, an out-of-the-box active little boy, and a toddler with nocturnal asthma every night at 1:00 a.m. I had been living on fumes for so long, I didn’t even know how I was existing.

A friend sent me a note and said, “Let’s meet for coffee.” We met at a tiny cafe for a 30-minute chat. She took my hand and said, “Sally, you are amazing. I watch you serving your family, you are getting no sleep but caring for Joy, you are giving your all to everyone you know. I just wanted you to know that I see your faithfulness and it matters!”

Tears started rolling down my cheek. I didn’t even know I needed someone to see me and give sympathy.

As I have been praying about releasing Help, I’m Drowning into the World, I hoped that it would be a book where women would feel seen, understood, and validated through the pressures of their lives in the same way I was.

So, when I do launch teams, I plan fun, community, gifts, tea time giveaways and so much more. But, the past few days have been so very crazy.

For many reasons, (also, I was traveling, chasing continents, setting up house and putting out a million fires),

my launch team did not exactly get launched—

It is a long story of a variety of circumstances. But I still want a big launch team to love, to enjoy, to share life with, and lots of giveaways. But because of the kerfuffles, I need some of you, my kindred spirits to join me, to be a part of a robust, fun community, and to share my newest book with the world. So if you did not get in before, now is your chance.

To join, you just go to this link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/211427150920066/

Request to join and you will be in!

I want to share your stories. I plan on having a tea time giveaway on zoom with several people and their friends. Wouldn’t that be fun—an hour together, sipping and sharing stories together. So, come on over, join and let’s share our hearts, dreams and have a cuppa together.

We have planned some fun giveaways, some live events, and some great opportunities to fellowship with like-minded women. We really have so much fun in these launch teams. I would be so honored if you would consider joining us.

I so need your friendship right now and I would love to be there to encourage you. At this juncture, we shall all face storms and issues as a community of friends—I have so much fun with my launch teams. I receive so much great encouragement and I know others feel it too. So looking forward to hearing your heart and hearing your own storms you are facing. Hoping many will be encouraged. Join in if you can!

Books Referenced in This Podcast:

FOR MORE

• Subscribe to this podcast on iTunes, Stitcher, or your favorite podcast app.

• Leave an iTunes Review These are so important as they help our podcast reach more women with messages of encouragement.

• Follow on Facebook and Instagram for the latest news and updates.

• Share with others. My prayer is that this podcast brings encouragement to women and families, and I would be honored for you to tell others about it.

• Join my friends and me in membership at Life with Sally, a place for me to share more teaching from the Bible and messages on education, motherhood, discipleship, and more!