Just didn't want to let the day go without saying.....

I couldn't sleep last night. The wind outside was fierce and wild and kept me awake. I crept downstairs and got a little bowl of cereal, the kind with almonds and cranberries and I put blueberries and pecans on top, and crawled onto the old, soft comfy couch. I was trying to figure out all that I had to do in the next few days--finishing the notebook for the Mom's Intensive at our house, this weekend. Praying that sweet mama will not die this week as it would lay heavy on my heart during the conference. Wondering about the medical issues that are immediately ahead with one so dear. Knowing I have a book proposal due this Friday. And the list grew.

But, in the midst of the darkness and wind and milk, I had a peace and deep joy in my heart that seemed to carry me above all of the stresses that seem to be piled on my soul plate.

Jesus reminded me that most of all, He matters. Loving Him, resting in Him, seeking His glory, straining to hear His voice.

Then He whispered, I gave you gifts-Sarah, Joel, Nathan and Joy. So, my sweet ones, you really are my treasures. You matter most of all, you are still my priority--every day, my thoughts are filled with you, my whisper prayers fill heaven, because you are never far from my heart thoughts, even in this busy-ness. You are all so very dear to me. I love who you are--you are vibrant, alive, passionate, idealistic, and the miracle is you love Jesus so very much and you still love Daddy and me, too. And so you are my priority today and I have prayed for you.

And then there is Clay-Daddy--partner through it all, strong, dependable, sitting in his leather chair and guiding us all with endless intuitive thoughts, ideas; our resident acoustic music man, chasing us all through the details of life and keeping us organized, passing on thoughts of God at Sunday morning feasts--my best friend.

Yes, I do have so very much on my life plate this week, and always more to do, but in this moment, this dark summer night, my heart is filled because of the blessing He has given, and I am so very, very grateful to have had the privilege of loving and caring for you. I love you.

mama

Now, my mind is more at rest, my heart is deeply grateful, my soul at peace again, and I think I will be able to go back to sleep.

Investing your life or frittering away the coins of time

"Time is the coin of your life. It is the only coin you have, and only you can determine how it will be spent. Be careful lest you let other people spend it for you."— Carl Sandburg

Every year, I pull away with the Lord to spend a day asking, "What is your will for my life right now? How should I invest my time, what commitments should I make? What do I need to cut? How am I living for your kingdom? How should I be investing for your kingdom--in the lives of my children, my marriage, other women, the community of women through my writing?

I have met very few women who are intentional about their lives--those women who challenge me to live my life by faith and devotion and expecting the Lord to do great things, as I live it every day in rhythm for Him.

I can tell you this, though, if you do not plan how to live your life, how you need to grow, what you need to commit to, and what God has on His mind and heart for you to do- (His design of your life, personality, and circumstances), then other people will take up your time, or you will just go with the flow and waste the coins of your life in vain.

And so, as you plan your year ahead, with your children, you husband, your home, what are your goals? What do you want to become? How are you growing? What will you study in the word this year?

And so, now you know some of the messages I will be sharing at our Mom's Intensive this year, and the very things I am committing my heart unto during this wonderful season in which I find myself.

My encouragement: go for excellence--don't compromise, work a little harder, be a little less selfish, love more deeply and more generously, read more, study more, celebrate the days.

More intentionality in the next few articles--it is inspiring my soul to ponder it all.

A Movement of God to change the world--a call to mothers!

Emil Österman Mother and Child

In every culture and in every generation, a mother and child reflects the beauty of God's design of womanhood. God intentionally crafted babies so that they would be fragile, dependent creatures that would need the love, songs, touch and nurture of a mother. When a woman understands that one of the greatest gifts she will ever receive from her creator is to have the opportunity to touch eternity through artfully nurturing the mind, heart and soul of a child, whose life will have implications for all of eternity, her life joins in kingdom purposes with God.

Motherhood is one of the most strategic Biblical callings for women at this time in history. When a mother understands God's design for her to raise a godly generation in her home, who can love and serve God and pass on righteousness to their own generation, there will be hope for that nation. Moral excellence, faith, emotional health, intellectual excellence and great works of mankind all stem from the home that wisdom builds as women embrace God's call on their lives.

A Call for Older, Wiser, more experienced women to Train Young Mothers

Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children,  to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.

Titus 2:3-5  reminds us that the skills of motherhood must be taught. Learning to love husbands and to cultivate a strong marriage, to love and train children and to make the home a foundational place of life-giving ministry is at the core of building a legacy of righteousness in each generation.

Yet, at this time in history, the imagination of motherhood in the minds and hearts of women has been lost in a sea on worldly philosophy that pulls women in many directions. Our culture wrongly tells us that all choices of women are equal, and so many women have been trained and feel competent to work at a career, but inadequate to do the eternal work of motherhood.

Children thrown to the wind of culture will not flourish in life any more than throwing seeds over a balcony will become a beautiful garden. However, choices do have consequences, and so for women who have believed the lie that children are resilient, and that there are no consequences for dividing their heart and time between their demanding careers and their children, we see devastating results. Thankfully, there are many ways and endless scenarios in which a mother can cultivate and nurture the hearts of their child, but we know that a child must not just receive the leftovers of his mother's time. All children want to be loved and to be called to a purpose, so if this love and devotion and purpose is not passed on in the home, the child will seek for it his whole life from the place he spends the most time.

As Clay and I committed our lives to ministering to families: to teach and train them in Biblical ways of discipline their children, to stay faithful in marriage, to establish their homes as foundations of love for God, love for each other and centers of His life, we realized that mothers were a key factor at this time in our culture, to establishing family as a foundational place for ministry.

Mothers have been created by God to be gardeners of the soul of children. Consequently, Clay and I have spent many years developing a ministry to help train, equip and encourage mothers in this significan role.

We have written numerous books, hold motherhood conferences, speak at events all over the world, and host intensive leadership trainings for women to learn how to train other mothers in this great task, and more. We are also dreaming with others about how we can reach this whole world of mothers with the vision God created them to fulfill..

Mom Heart Ministries is our attempt to train and reach out to a whole generation of women to watch God use them in their homes to raise a godly generation for his glory. Even this blog is focussed at equipping, encouraging and providing an environment where moms can meet over Biblical ideals.

Our ministry has many goals and projects ahead to continue expanding our reach to families all over the world.

Perhaps you would like to join with us by becoming on of our family of financial supporters, prayer warriors or workers at our conferences and in our ministry, or leading a Bible study for moms. We so appreciate the team of people God is raising up all over the world to be a part of His great work.

If the Lord has put it on your heart to donate to our ministry, please use the "Donate" button in the sidebar, or call the Whole Heart Ministries office at 888-488-4466.

If you would like to be placed on our mailing list to hear about all of our conferences and trainings in the future, please go here.

If you would like to pray for us and for our ministry, please sign up for our prayer letter here.

We cannot do this work alone, and are so privileged to have working alongside of us many people all over the  world. We thank each of you for your generosity in helping us to watch God take this great work all over the world. Thank you so very much for becoming a part of Mom Heart Ministries.

My sweet friend, Sarah Mae, a young mom and blogger, has recently visited me in my home and has come away with vision and excitement in her own heart from the deep needs she has felt as a young mom in the midst of three precious children under 5. Her own life and needs have focussed her mind to understand how much she needs encouragement and she writes from a heart engaged in this journey of motherhood.You will also enjoy her perspective. (go here to see her article today! )

Courtney and Angela at Good Morning Girls also did such an incredible job this summer studying Ministry of Motherhood with over 1500 women all over the world. They are also be used by God in such an amazing way to encourage women in their own walk with the Lord. They meet online to encourage moms as they study the word together. Thanks to them for encouraging so many.

There are more women on our "team" gathering to help reach moms with these inspiring Biblical messages. Won't you join us, as an army of women, to pray, encourage, train, and love moms to reach their children with the wonderful messages of our Lord?

Wholeheart.org

PS It just happens that I have written a guest post that also came out today on our newest version of Educating the Whole Hearted Child. Go to Raising Homemakers to see that post!

Find the happy, look for joy around every corner

Wonderful Jeremy! At La Baguettes downtown Co. Springs

Always, bright, gracious, encouraging and friendly every time I go in for coffee and treats, and on my birthday treated me to coffee and free breakfast! Go Jeremy!

Pondering today, "Only the wise can dance to the rhythm of life."

I want to dance,.......,

Joel, bounding up the stairs from his basement bedroom, and always bringing cheer--wrestling on the floor with Kelsey. Fun, fun memory before he drove off in his new second hand maroon car on his way to California to work in film scoring.

Joel, pounding away on my childhood piano whenever I am in the kitchen, and hearing grand music of his making coming out and invading my brain--ahhh, to have a composer living in your home. A happy memory I will visit. Joel has always made me happy.

Remembering how fun it was to have Sarah Mae in my home and scheming with her for new projects that will change the world!

And so, I regularly look for the fingerprints of fun, the love, the laughter, the good, the beautiful--and then I take a photograph of it in my mind.

So what is your happy this week?

Wishing you the best weekend.

What is the cross you have been asked to bear?

Titian Christ carrying his cross

And He was saying to them all, “If anyone wishes to come after Me, he must deny himself, and take up his cross daily and follow Me. For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake, he is the one who will save it.  For what is a man profited if he gains the whole world, and loses or forfeits himself?

Luke 9:23-25

My birthday was truly a blessing this year. So many years in August my children are on trips with friends or relatives or camps or anywhere but home. Since I am so connected at the hip and heart to my children, I sometimes get sad when we are away from each other on birthdays since they are such a big deal and such a time of blessing in our home.

This year, however, my cup was filled to the brim with such wonderful well-wishers (thank you very much!) and moments of reflection on my life and just how much the Lord has blessed me in my journey with Him.

Before I went to bed, I opened my little devotional to read one last verse to end my day in worship of Him. I have this commitment to think of my birthday as a marking of what I have lived and what I will commit to live for Him in the next year. My heart was soft and I told Him I wanted to hear His voice, His will, to please Him in every way. Then I read:

"Take up your cross and follow me,"

These words and the following seemed to burn into my heart.

I am somewhat of a Pollyanna at heart and love for everyone to be happy and all people living in harmony with each other. However, God has not allowed that to be my story. I have many conflicts that it seems will never resolve, challenges, issues, stresses that come from being in a fallen world. Most I will never write about or speak of because I so believe in loyalty and discretion when it comes to people in my personal life.

Many of these anguishing difficulties,  I have had to bear for years in waiting for God's answer to my prayers.

But this moment , in the darkness of  night, with only Him and me talking, I realized that these "crosses to bear" are just what my heavenly Father wants me to take up to bear. My cross of the pain of my heart is just the place that He wants me to trust, to worship, to accept the limitations, as a part of the story of my life that can glorify Him if I am willing to bear it joyfully right where I am.

If I carry these, bear them up, accept them, I will be pleasing in my heart to my only Love--accepting His will for me with grace and resolve to live there. "Not my will, but yours be done." Total submission to what is.

My Christian life cannot be, "I am yours, but I know you will let me whine and complain about this particular issue or person because it is hard for me." Yet, a new realization came across me that evening that these crosses are what He wants me to pick up and carry--they are a part of my purpose in this world--that somehow when I carry them as a gift, as His will, I can better reflect His glory, His supernatural peace, His love and His grace to sustain me.

So, what cross is He asking you to bear by faith, and as a point of worship to Him? Is it a child? A difficult marriage? Irrational or angry or passive family members? An illness? A death? A disappointment? It is only as we pick up our crosses and carry them to the place of dying to ourselves and living for Him, in every circumstance, that we will live in freedom, grace, love and worship.

What cross will you carry, for His glory, today?

I am committing to accept my cross, to take the load with a grateful heart, that He who sees me each day and has goodwill towards me, knows that this cross, my cross is just what I need to suit my soul and heart for His kingdom.

Summer party for the Dads

I host a monthly Bible study in my home with lots and lots of sweet moms--all ages, backgrounds and types. I have grown to love these wonderful women. Because we have 260 on our address list, we know that every time (since children get sick, life happens and men travel) we know that we will have a varied group every time. Some on the list moved away long ago but still keep getting all of our emails. And of course we have new moms every time. But Clay and I thought there should always be a little something for the dads since the moms were getting a lot of input. Every summer, we host a potluck for the moms and dads who want to come to hear a talk about home discipleship or education or marriage or whatever is the need that year.

To lure the dads in, we offer great food. Each mom brings a meat dish, and then either a salad, desert or veggie. We had so much food this year.

About 90 people came and of course at first some of the guys who are new wonder, "Who are these Clarksons and what have I gotten myself into?

But we have enough of the dads from the past that take initiative to meet and greet and tell enough stories and jokes that all seem to feel at home.

On the deck

some at tables

and then we gather in the living room

Some pile up on the stairs

Clay talks with the Dads about nurturing the life of Christ in the home from his new book, Educating the Whole Hearted Child

Friendships are begun, thoughts are stimulated, hearts are open and a good time was had by all.

I've never been so surprised!

Surprise! and I was.

So, Sarah and I are driving in the car toward the home of my sweet friend, Phyllis. "I hope Phyllis remembers. I forgot to call her. Did you? We emailed about having a cup of tea together a couple of weeks ago."

"I think she will remember, Mom, but you have both been out of town, so we will see when we get there."

Phyllis had lived in Austria, too. We mutually love almost everything about Austria. It was the place where both of us learned so much about Jesus--trusting Him as we worked behind the iron curtain. Loving the beauty, the flowers, the mountains, the atmosphere, the coffee and the tea, and holding God's hand as we walked through a new culture and language and having to depend on Him. So, that is a part of why my heart and Phyllis's are connected. We did not know each other when we were there, but we cut our spiritual teeth on the same place at the same time. And I know that when I am with Phyllis, I will be in the presence of God.

And so, I was excited. She said she would have a pot of tea on her porch and celebrate my birthday with Sarah and me in our mutual, beloved friendship.

I knew that many of my sweet local friends, were tied up in a meeting for their children. And so it never entered my mind.

But, there they were, those sweet ones who could make it, smiling faces, laughing, you could have pushed me over with a feather.

Often alone on my birthday and away from my mother these past years, I didn't know how much I needed to be with friends. The tears flowed and flowed. How did Sarah manage this without me knowing? My sweet, amazing daughter who arranged it.

A breakfast feast--lovingly prepared with a dish from each friend. And of course, Phyllis used the tea set from Austria.

The best part was that they shared memories, life-shared, love, impact and blessing. My cup was indeed filled and I felt so very loved. I am so very grateful and humbled to have sweet friends who took the time to fill my heart. And now I move into my day with a new perspective. Love and grace makes all the difference. I am so very grateful.

Hanging out with the right crowd?

Mary Cassatt--Friends celebrating life together

"Tell me what company thou keepst, and I'll tell thee what thou art." - Miguel de Cervantes (1547 - 1616) Spanish novelist.

There is a smile on my face and a happiness shining in my soul. Celebrating life with a true jewel of a friend this morning on her flowered porch, and I already know that china tea cups, fruit, candles and love will be waiting for me. Even last night I was already excited.

Finding a true friend is a treasure--one who, whenever I am with her, my love for God grows, my personal heart is affirmed, hope shines its light on my dreams, and my emotional cup is filled.

Many years ago, I remember Howard Hendricks saying how important it is to be around those who walk with God. And so, I made this commitment and wrote it in a life journal:  "Invest time with friends who build you up in all the areas of your ideals as often as possible. Cultivate them, affirm them, love them, invest in them.

Spend as little time with critical people, those who gossip, those who doubt and are always negative and drain your soul. You can only have so many drainers in your life at once."

And so, I have sought out friends who are loyal and walk with God. I don't get to see them often enough, but I do make anchors in my schedule for them because I need them. I invite them to my home, they invite me to theirs. It is a lifeline that has kept me holding on to ideals.

I also know that I must own the refreshment and restoration for my own soul as it is constantly being depleted on a regular basis--I am only happy and able to cope when I put back what has been taken away. Fun, beauty, pleasure is a wise investment for those whose life demands a lot.

And so, I am dressed up, made up, feel like a little girl going to a tea party--and that is really exactly what I am doing. I am going for a visit to my treasured friend. I will think about all the responsibilities later, as I know they will still be there. But this strategic meeting will keep me for faithful in the long run.

***************************************************************************************************

PS Guess I need to clarify a bit. I assume that my audience knows me, but I was not clear enough. Nowhere do I say that we are not to reach out or share with the lost or give sympathy to those who need it. I hope that I am able to give encouragement and grace to many, many all over the world, every year. I have committed myself to that. Yet, there will always be more "drainers", those who draw from my time, heart and soul), than I can ever take care of. The drainers who are God's will are my sweet children and husband and then inner circle friends--we take from each other on a regular basis. However, I must monitor how many I am willing to give myself away to, after them, or I will overcommit and be unwise in expending myself to a point of burnout. I am talking here to so many women I know--those who have given their lives to ministry and ideals and serving. But, I see so many women, like myself, who have few or little boundaries. There are so many lost and depleted and depressed and overwhelmed women in my life that I would just love to help. I do not want them to be alone or feel invisible at all.

But, I have had to learn that if I take on too many people and too many issues, I deplete all of my resources and then have so little to give. I have also learned the difference between women who are depressed and truly going through difficult and demanding situations and those who really are destructive in their relationships. But most of all what I wanted to communicate is that we need to hang around with people who help us to want to keep our ideals, to have as our inner circle those who live by faith, who walk with God, who have hearts of compassion, who spur us to a greater walk with God, so that we can keep holding fast to our ideals in a fallen culture and so that we will remain faithful. No one can do it alone--no one can keep giving and giving and giving without burning out, unless they make the time for Sabbath rests in life.

I am guilty of giving to a fault and then blowing my stack and I have had to learn as a leader that part of my responsibility is to refuel, even when my plate is overfull. Grace to all.

It's the Christians who make me crazy!

When I dress up and try to look like a real adult at conferences, and then I speak about all of my ideals and commitments passionately, it would be so easy for me to give the illusion that I am a perfect person who has finally reached maturity and rarely ever sin. However, when I return home from a great conference like the one in the Woodlands last weekend, I still have to live in my home with myself. And myself is still sinful and selfish at heart and in the midst of grand ideals, I can still stumble and trip over the most menial of issues--like traffic or a crowded seat on the plane, or a night without sleep.

Like the beast in the fairy tale, though he was really a prince in position, he was a beast on the inside. And his inside self came to the outside.

Thank the Lord that will never happen to me. I don't think I would feel comfortable having everyone in the world see all of the darkness or pettiness lurking inside my soul, after all, I am still in process.

I just wanted to put it out there. All of us struggle and wrestle within. If it wasn't for my children, I would be so much more holy. It's those unreasonable in-laws. The people who have hurt me the most are those Christians in my church who were mean-spirited and have been so critical of me (or my children.) Or, if my supposed Christian husband would actually act in a loving way, we would have such a good marriage. Or my family doesn't agree with my Christian ideals, or If the pastor at our church wasn't so unloving or judgmental, If, if, if.......we think and say, and we all have some of these issues, and it is the Christian ones that make me crazy and yet, it is normal life in a fallen world.

We all live in this broken place--this is the place separated from perfect love, perfect grace. It is not wrong to feel anger or depression or discouragement or deep fear or hate. You are not an unattractive personality or person if you feel these things--do not listen to the lie that it is all your fault, as that only leads to despair and hopelessness.

But, it is what we do with all of these feelings. You are not a bad person for being immature or even for feeling anger at the stress another sinful person brings to you. But how you live by faith in the next moments, how you speak to your brain--if you take every thought captive--make it a prisoner--will determine if you will become more free, more loving, more filled with grace and compassion or if you will become a victim of the darkness of living in a sinful world. What you do with your thoughts determines what you become captivated by.

But, it is also best to not allow the "bad" people in your life to define you. You cannot make immature people mature. You cannot control how they behave. But you can control your own heart--and that is the foundation of your whole being--not what you do--but what you think and cherish and practice inside of you--in your heart where the beast lives.

Remember who you are: You are forgiven. You are royalty in the eyes of God. You are not your past--the old things have past away, all things have become new.

It was for freedom that Christ set you free, therefore do not be subject to a yoke of slavery.

There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the spirit of life in Christ Jesus has set you free from the law of sin and death.

There is therefore nothing that can separate you from the love of God.

Walk in your newness. Live in your beauty-you have the imprint of a master artist on your soul. Throw off the people in your life who would steal your joy and bring His light into your darkness.

Spiritual maturity is a process of becoming mature one tiny step, one day at a time. We are all in process until we see Him face to face. Thank goodness he allows me to be the toddler that I am, but He keeps loving me and bringing me forward.

All is grace. All is forgiven. All is new.

Today, I am.........

Up early eating a delicious veggie omelet, drinking strong coffee and alive in my heart with all of the wonderful women I am meeting at the Woodlands HS conference. Such hard working, devoted, inspired moms--all of whom deserve a break, need a massage, a maid, an assistant and a vacation. So blessed to be in their company. So enjoyed our chocolate party last night with 289 women celebrating life together. But I always wonder afterwards--did I say too much? Did I help at all? Do these women know just how much God loves them? Then off to sleep. I talked to Joy and Joel late just before sleep, who lived through a torrential rainstorm somewhere between Colorado and Arizona in Joel's new second hand car that he bought on Thursday. Joy left her driver's license at WalMart and they had to go back for it. I found them in Flagstaff, sequestered at a hotel for the night and making great memories together and building on their relationship. Joy's job is to keep Joel awake, and to give encouragement and help to him this week as he foray's into California to find an apartment, and seek a job in the film scoring industry. And so thankful to the Martinez's, our dear family friends, who will keep our two while they are pursuing apartments this week.

Sarah called us in the middle of the night to ask about our dog, Kelcie. Seems she ate from the garbage bag some old chicken, threw up all over our carpet and now will not move from the porch outside--what should be done? No one wants our sweet,funny,  belligerent dog to be sick. Never, never a dull moment.

Nate called with lots of news yesterday about life, work, friends, movies, dreams--right in the middle of one of my talks. And so I told my audience to yell out "HI, Nathan, " to him and it brought him to chuckles. (I just happened to be speaking about being available to your children to seize the moment and find time to really pay attention to their personality and needs when he called--so it just seemed like a providential live application to my talk. (Thanks, Nate, for calling at just the right time.)

Clay and I working side by side and remembering what we felt like as parents of young children.

And now off to speak again and see old friends and drink more coffee and tea and keep making memories. I am blessed.